Jul 01
Click for full imageDon Comments: OK, we’ve seen tons of perms and oodles of mullets on these covers – but I do believe this is the first permed mullet. (Pullet?) Assuming that’s the eponymous Bard whose Tale this is, he’s apparently not the brightest light in the harbor, since he a) agreed to accompany his hairdresser on a thieving expedition from an albino lizard-man (do such things EVER end well?) and b) misunderstood her when she said she wanted him along to carry the loot.
Published 1993
Many thanks to the Don!
(Rating: 6.63 out of 10)
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July 1st, 2010 at 9:40 am
Isn’t that Michael Bolton before he cut his hair?
July 1st, 2010 at 9:55 am
Would a bard take his guitar with him when thieving?
It would seem to be an unnecessary emcumberance.
July 1st, 2010 at 9:58 am
Cowabunga! What’s Master Splinter doing with all that treasure??
July 1st, 2010 at 10:02 am
>>Psst, it’s not his birthday yet …. three, two … <<
But the cuttlery seems a little oversized for any kind of cake.
July 1st, 2010 at 10:17 am
The bard has two weapons: Sword and his instrument
) The instrument is crucial, especially when one needs to be quiet.
July 1st, 2010 at 11:10 am
Creature: Hold on while I get a few coins. Wait a minute, you aren’t charity collectors at all… you’re musicians!
July 1st, 2010 at 11:47 am
Maybe they’re operating by the mariachi principle. They go door-to-door and play until someone pays them to leave.
And, like any starving artists, they are shocked and awed by the presence of actual money.
July 1st, 2010 at 12:22 pm
The fortress was a cross between frost and fire… you know like luke-warm water.
July 1st, 2010 at 2:56 pm
“I’ll stab him, you go Michael Bolton on his ass.”
July 1st, 2010 at 4:34 pm
my brother TOTALLY had a permed mullet in the 80s. he also wore zubas and took breakdancing lessons. oh and wore braces. i believe thats whats known as a “hot mess.”
July 1st, 2010 at 5:28 pm
He must have a pretty low IQ if he needs to be told to shut up in the middle of a break-in.
July 1st, 2010 at 7:04 pm
I thought he was Robin Hood again, this time without hat or quiver. And she is Judith Hann. Or Brian May.
July 1st, 2010 at 7:15 pm
Send the girl with the dagger in first. You stand out here with the sword and keep an eye out. And no singing!
July 1st, 2010 at 7:39 pm
[The Bard sings]
Come hear my desperate saga
of sneaky nightly deeds
I shouldn’t have been thieving
but bards do have their needs
I met this armed maiden
With mighty raven hair
She said that I did carry
my mullet with such flair
Said she, “The albino lizard
“has plenty gold and pearls
“So let us go a-thieving
“To pay our costly curls…”
July 1st, 2010 at 8:39 pm
Bravo sir!
July 1st, 2010 at 8:40 pm
those look like world-class 1990s US soccer mullets to me. I guess the MNT needed coin for new jerseys?
July 1st, 2010 at 9:36 pm
I have this one! Almost sent it in, too, but I was afraid this would count as a franchise book. I don’t remember it too well, but I have a sinking feeling Mr. Albino Lizard is supposed to be the dragon antagonist. It’s kind of hard to see because of the shininess, but note how they felt compelled to print ‘frost’ in blue and ‘fire’ in red. (They also did this on the spine. And the back cover.) Not too bad a book, though.
July 2nd, 2010 at 9:38 am
@Yagiz #5: THREE weapons. His sword, his lute and his instrument.
And his rapier wit.
FOUR weapons. His sword, his lute, his instument and his rapier wit.
And his flowing locks. FIVE weapons…
July 8th, 2010 at 3:07 am
You know, I like to keep my gold hoard right near my front door too.
August 9th, 2011 at 3:55 pm
I don’t mean to judge, but I think if you’re an albino you should shy away from wearing white.
Unless you want people to think you’re a statue.