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Sep 25

Dude... I thought chasing a naked women couldn't get stranger... look at that guy dancing on rubbish!Click for full image

Vincent’s Art Direction: So here’s what I’m thinking. A man and a woman in a landfill. I want the woman tastefully nude, so have the man covering her naughty bits even though they’re standing about twenty feet apart. Lastly, have an army of giant preying mantises coming over the hill.
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 8.21 out of 10)
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14 Responses to “Starlight”

  1. SI Says:

    I like to think the guy is directing some sort of post apocalyptic Broadway dance number.

  2. THX 1138 Says:

    “Either we’re really small or something’s getting bigger!”

  3. Tat Wood Says:

    Which story is this supposedly depicting? ‘The Mantis Who Murdered Mohammed’? Is his left arm preternaturally long? He seems to be attempting foreplay from twenty feet away. To allow this he has absorbed his right foot and forearm. But not his clothes.

  4. weaver Says:

    “They Don’t Make Life Like They Used To” would be my guess. No giant mantises though there are some insectoid heads; no nudity though there is semi-nudity. All limbs were of normal length in the story, as far as I can recall.

  5. A.R.Yngve Says:

    I have that book! Awesome stories. Awful cover.

  6. Adam Roberts Says:

    “In this volume we’ve assembled all the great short fiction of Alfred Bester. In the other volume is the not-so-great stuff.”

  7. Phil Says:

    Bester writes some of the smartest SF around, but we know the SF market is made up of people who just like giant insects, so let’s put some on the cover and hope they’re not disappointed when they discover there aren’t any in the book. They’ll only make the discovery after they’ve bought it, so it doesn’t matter.

  8. Herm Says:

    The largest praying mantises are females. Your whole sacrificial maiden thing may be about to backfire, Tastefully Flailing Arm Guy!

    (Accuracy demands that I mention that the post-coital snacking of female mantises on their mates does not happen all, or even most, of the time. See Snopes for details.)

  9. Jerk of all Trades Says:

    Beware the clothes-eating giant space mantids!

  10. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    “Jill, I think if you do the Watusi and I do a Luau they will be highly entertained and not want to eat us….Plus, you should take your clothes off for extra effect.”

  11. Yoss Says:

    There by his right knee. Is that the head of the robot maid from the Jetsons?

  12. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘Cheer up, human! If he’s all that into you, he’ll GLADLY let you chew his head off in your carnal ecstasy while his pulsing loins continue to sire your hideous monkey larvae.’

  13. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Editor: “Whew! That was a close one. We ALMOST released a book with just the author’s name and the title on the cover. Lord knows what could’ve happened! Thank my lucky star I found that poster for THE DEADLY MANTIS and slapped it on the cover at the very last minute…”

  14. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Wait, is that a music cue I hear?

    We represent the Lollipop Guild
    The Lollipop Guild, the Lollipop Guild.
    And in the name of the Lollipop Guild
    We’d like to welcome you to Mantis Land

    Followed by:

    Ding! Dong! my mate is dead
    He dropped his sperm then lost his head
    Ding! Dong! my mantis mate is dead . . .

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