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Jan 16

Best work out video... ever!Click for slightly larger UNSHEEPED image

Guthrie Comments: The story inside features no naked women, no earthquakes and no desert.  I have no idea how the artist or editor thought the cover would be any good at all.
Published 1974

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 8.04 out of 10)
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18 Responses to “The God Makers”

  1. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Women always think they’re heavy when they’re not.

  2. THX 1138 Says:

    “Ah, waking up in the sun… geez, my goddam neck!”

  3. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    She: ‘I read 204 pages of this…and they made me god of abandoned parched wastelands? WTF?’

  4. SI Says:

    Whatever song she’s dancing to must be a good one.

  5. L.B. Says:

    I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer…

    Oh wait; wrong story.

  6. fearofmusic Says:

    she appears to be in pain. considering that she seems to have hit the ground hard enough to shatter it, it’s rather understandable. at least her silicon implants didn’t burst. that will be one less surgical procedure she’ll have to endure.

  7. Bibliomancer Says:

    Warning: when jumping from great heights never land on your knees. Your knees will be all right, but you’ll end up breaking your neck.

    Unknown Artist™ has his boob technique mastered. But faces are so hard to draw.

  8. Tom Noir Says:

    Bah, these are sci-fi covers. Faces aren’t important!

  9. Bibliomancer Says:

    Here at Unknown Artist Institute™ we teach you the skillz you need to be a playa in the fast-growing, high-paying field of sci-fi cover art. You will learn such proven techniques as drawing convincing:

    Boobs
    Rockets
    Cleavage
    Butt-cracks
    Dinosaurs
    Tits
    Cat People

    Start today! See our ad featured on Chinese GSS.

  10. SI Says:

    “I went to Unknown Artist Institute™ you know! I got one cover, well… self published, my book of sci-fi poetry. It didn’t sell well… sorry? Of course you have make that a large meal.”

  11. Rags Says:

    Frank Herbert: “Ok its done and i have to tell you, it might be my best work!”

    Publisher: “Great Franky, great. Now to add the cover.”

    (game show lights go off, blaring alarms and 2 las vegas show girls push a wheel of fortune type device into the room)

    Frank Herbert: “What the……”

    Publisher: “Ok Franky, SPIN THE WHEEL OF CRAPPY COVERS!!”

    Frank Herbert: “I dont think………”

    Publisher: “SPIN THE F+$#IN WHEEL FRANKY BABY!”

    Clack – clack – clack – clack – clack. Wheel finally stops on “awesome dark boobies. No face, dancing girl erupting from the ground”

    Frank Herbert: “You got to be kidding me………….”

    Publisher: “Cheer up Franky baby, could be worse look what was next on the wheel.”

    Frank looks down to the next spoke on the wheel of crappy covers and it reads; lion man in a banana hammock gut punching a naked white guy while standing in a sea of fire with a snake in the foreground asking whats up?!.

  12. Tat Wood Says:

    If she’d fallen from slightly higher, or in softer ground, it could have made a more iconic cover http://www.boldaslove.us/2009/12/31/miracle-for-a-maggot-fundraiser-for-funkadelic-graphic-artist-pedro-bell/ Iconic, but not as lucrative as a soul sistah walking naked over a creme brulee and finding the weak spot, alas.

    But Unknown Artist (AKA Ray Feibush) did such a bang-up job here that only three years later they replaced this with a Bruce Pennington cover that is just about the most Bruce Penningtonish thing in the entire history of Bruce Penningtonness http://www.flickr.com/photos/pulpcrush/sets/72157629689967864/detail/

  13. fred Says:

    Just a semuta user grooving to the music.

  14. B. Chiclitz Says:

    I bet if you turned the book over there’d be a wicked butt crack to contemplate . . . .

    If only the Unknown Artist Institute™ included lower legs and feet in its curriculum. This cover artist clearly gave it his “all” on the torso, and did a workmanlike job on the nimbus of hair, but just collapsed in despair when he got to the calf region.

  15. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    As a graduate of Unknown Artist Institute ™ I got…published…in major markets. My art has been…appreciated. I am…[the] envy of my colleagues…who…wish to follow [in] my [footsteps]. I am under…the gun…all the time…[t]o do my best. I don’t need the money anymore. I have my dignity. Thank you.

  16. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Frank Herbert Winner of Hugo and Nebula Awards.”

    So the guy who won the “Frank Herbert” (whatever that may be) and who comes from Hugo and Nebula has decided to award… what exactly?

  17. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    @Bibliomancer – aren’t Boobs and Tits the same thing? Oh wait, did you notice a little bird in the cover?

  18. Tag Wizard Says:

    Many thanks for the correction, Tat.

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