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Jun 01

But he looked so trustworthy... with the magic crystals... and explosions....Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Ye poor souls, gaze upon the beardy face of PURE EEEEEEVIL!
Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.54 out of 10)
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25 Responses to “The Master of Evil”

  1. THX 1138 Says:

    Overindulging in the curried beans will do that.

  2. Bibliomancer Says:

    Jesus H. Antichrist in a waistcoat.

  3. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    The fart of the first world.

    You’ll notice how all of the dragons on the frame look like Spike, from My Little Pony.

  4. SI Says:

    It’s an alright city… just don’t get a flat under his robe though.

  5. fred Says:

    When the Master of Evil unbuttons all the Buttons of Evil on his Vest of Evil while wearing the Robe of Evil and the Necklace of Evil while holding the Two Glowing Green Gems of Evil, the end is nigh.

  6. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @fred: those aren’t gems. Those are the Jujubes of Evil.

  7. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Any moment he’ll start his EVIL Greek folk dance — beware, world!

  8. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Bow down before the radioactive avocados! Submit to them! MOA HA HAAA!!”

  9. Tom Noir Says:

    @ARYngve: Ooh, do you think the next in the series is titled My Big Fat Evil Wedding?

  10. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    What this cover needs, now…what this cover needs is a ‘Coupon Inside!’ shuriken off to one side. Maybe an evil coupon. To make all of this evil so much more tempting.

  11. A.R.Yngve Says:

    I second the coupon… plus the tag “With EVIL Foreword By Isaac Asimov.”

  12. Anna T. Says:

    If they put THE Master on this cover, that could only be an improvement on the actual situation. He’s ACTUALLY evil. And also more intimidating than this “evil” hipster who thinks the height of fashion is a waistcoat over a robe.

  13. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘I’ve been waiting for you, Obi-Wan. We meet again at last. The circle is–‘

    ‘Shut your gob, Darth Santorini.’

    ‘K.’

  14. Tat Wood Says:

    @Anna T.: Maybe this is the Roger Delgado incarnation in his mellow, Cailiornian phase before we first saw him.

    “I’m, like, the Master. You can obey me if that’s your bag.”

  15. Anna T. Says:

    @ Tat Wood: That’s BRILLIANT! You may be right.

  16. Undecided Says:

    The title is somewhat misleading. At 500 feet tall, you don’t have to work to be evil, you just have to be clumsy.

  17. Ian Says:

    “Don’t rock the boat, rock the boat baby….”

    Beards are cool!

  18. Tom Noir Says:

    He appears to be holding lime jello in each hand which is definitely SERIOUSLY evil.

  19. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Opa!”

  20. Bruce A Munro Says:

    He’s stolen the Flubber from that Robin Williams movie! Nothing can stop him now!

  21. Tat Wood Says:

    The original ending for the Weird Al movie was reshot after it tested badly.

  22. fred Says:

    If he had an evil barber his hair and beard would form a perfect circle.

  23. GSS ex-noob Says:

    He’s the evil twin of Bob Ross, completely opposite, which makes him EXTRA evil.* He will squash the happy little trees.

    @fred: It nearly is already. The barber must be slowly going for that effect, just a little each week and soon — circularity.

    @Bruce: Could be flubber; could be a squishy gel-filled toy, could be green-tinted implants.
    ,
    * I had intractable insomnia for a few months. Then I found the local PBS station had Bob on at about 2 AM. Lulled me right to sleep and I broke the pattern quickly.

  24. Emster Says:

    Actual Evil: who’s the dork in the 80’s granny vest and nightie? nom, nom, nom… kinda bland…

    The End.

  25. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Emster: GSS! Although I think it’s more 70s — it’s not that far from Avocado Green.

    Seriously, it’s like the artist slapped a man’s face on a picture of Granny showing off her necklace and bidding the kids to come try the lime Jello blobs she’s just made.

    (If a groovy granny, she’s invented the Jello Shot and is offering it to the gals at bridge club.)

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