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Oct 12

cover text: tl;drClick for larger image

Marge Comments: Oh come on! You can squeeze some more text onto that cover!

Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.33 out of 10)
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36 Responses to “Jade Darcy and the Affair of Honor”

  1. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Her legs are so long even Bayonetta feels short by comparison.

  2. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Nothing makes a book cover look better than small astrological symbols scattered about – amirite?

  3. THX 1138 Says:

    Jade Darcy and the Handy Ladyshave.

  4. Bibliomancer Says:

    Is she the floor show at The Restaurant at the End of the Universe?

  5. Raoul Says:

    “She was rough, tough, gruff, computer-enhanced muff stuff sitting on her duff ,,, huff and puff … grab ’em by the scruff and cuff and snuff and” … enough.

  6. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    “THE”. It’s spelled “THE”, you nitwit art director! You don’t get to put new letters into the alphabet just because you planned the title design so poorly.

  7. fred Says:

    I would have gone with affaire d’honneur just to cram a few more letters onto the cover.

  8. B. Chiclitz Says:

    They oughtta computer-enhance that terrible shag haircut!

  9. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @fred—and her name should be “Jade D’Arcy.”

  10. JuanPaul Says:

    I read it as “rheumanization” and thought it was novel about a woman’s struggle with arthritis.

    This cover is glorious.

  11. Lillie Awesome Says:

    Reading that makes me feel like I’ve just pushed a loaded wheelbarrow over the crest of a steep hill, and now I’m running to keep it from getting away from me. I never realized my eyes could get out of breath.

  12. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Lillie A.—that definitely wins the “Simile of the Week” award! 😉

  13. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @Lillie, BC: shush! Or they’ll try to put the simile on the cover too!

  14. Bibliomancer Says:

    Jade should simile more. She’d look more pretty.

  15. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @B’mancer: well, she is rough and tough. Maybe she should try more of that computer enhancement?

  16. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Strike a light, I’ve seen those tights before!

  17. Anna T. Says:

    With a body structure like that, of course she needs to be “rehumanized”. I mean, anatomical issues much?

    And if she’s supposed to be a “mercenary on the brink of battle” . . . why the fetish gear?

  18. Tat Wood Says:

    “I Lost My Leg to a Starship Trooper’

  19. B. Chiclitz Says:

    After reading this book I know the title to the sequel: The Defenestration of Jade Darcy

  20. Mellie M. Says:

    I bet those boots have stiletto heels. You need computer enhancement to fight battles in stilettos.

  21. Tor Mented Says:

    Book One in Tie: A Science Fiction Novel By?
    Why doesn’t the rest of the cover rhyme?

  22. Tor Mented Says:

    You could do a book report just on the cover.

  23. Yoss Says:

    Speaking as a designer, I feel like I know that layout. I’ve made that layout. That’s the design that resides in a folder named “Kitchen Sink” — as in, “everything AND the kitchen sink.” It sits next to the folder that contains the original tasteful design.

  24. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Tor M.—Why doesn’t the rest of the cover rhyme?

    It’s free verse, stream of consciousness, concrete poetry and, um, one more, er, what is it . . . oh, I know: rubbish!

  25. Tor Mented Says:

    ‘I just started reading “Jane Darcy and the Affair of Honor.”‘
    ‘Great. How far along are you?’
    ‘Halfway through the cover.’

    (Note: Because this is a British site, I did the quote marks the opposite way. I refuse to drive on the wrong side of the road, though.)

  26. Tor Mented Says:

    (Actually, I always thought the British quote marks made more sense anyway.)

  27. Tat Wood Says:

    @Tor: I refuse to drive on the wrong side of the road, though’

    You must crash a lot when you’re driving in France or America.

  28. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @Tor, Tat: almost as much as Jade’s enhancements! 😀

  29. fred Says:

    Oh. There’s a parrot. A partially blue parrot. It may or may not be nailed to the perch.

  30. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Needless to say, this is NOT the authors’ preferred cover (Old pals of mine).

    But like most authors, they had no say in it. We did get a few laughs at parties, half “ooo, congrats you got a book published”, half “ooo, that cover is… erm…”

    (There is no apostrophe in her name, though. And she is most emphatically NOT a fetish model or sex symbol or anything.)

    ———————————————————-

    Tag Wizard: you should have 3 emails from me which include a total of 14 of the most eye-popping covers available today (Or at least, as of last Sunday).

    Mostly BAEN!explosions but a few other, including at least one self-pub about costuming your octopus. More from our old pal Gordon R. “Out standing in his own field” Dickson. And at least one that was too shiny and had an awful pun even by their standards.

  31. Tor Mented Says:

    @Tat
    Do you look askance
    At driving in France?
    But I’m in America
    We drive way over there-ica.

  32. Tracy Says:

    No one’s mentioned this yet, but that lady’s head is freakishly large.

  33. Ray P Says:

    Nice to see that even Deep Ones celebrate Christmas/Thanksgiving.

  34. JuanPaul Says:

    Be sure not to miss book two: The Walk of Shame

  35. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Goodness, it’s been quite the few days here on GSS for me and my pals; their book shows up and is immediately followed by a submission of mine.

  36. Muttley Says:

    Of course Darcy is correctly spelled. My own surname (Dicey, and yes, Americans, that is my Surname) is derived from it, probably after the money ran out….

    I would like to know why she’s open-carrying a dustbuster though

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