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Jul 04

OK kids. It's just a fun boat ride. Like Splash Mountain.Click for larger image

Jimmy Comments: “I said “socks” not “sucks”! Please don’t send me to the front lines. I’m ten years old!”

Published 1991

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.43 out of 10)
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19 Responses to “George Washington’s Socks”

  1. THX 1138 Says:

    “No, we’re not there yet! Well, you should have gone before we left!”

  2. Tom Noir Says:

    Winter in Valley Forge was no laughing matter. Good luck, kids!

  3. Innocent Bystander Says:

    At least one of George’s socks is being worn as a cap by the guy in the lower right hand corner. I have a feeling the smirky kid behind him knows where the other one is.

  4. fred Says:

    Uh oh.
    https://www.scholastic.com/teachers/books/george-washington-s-spy-by-elvira-woodruff/

  5. Ray P Says:

    Why have they got a Chinese girl in a sack. Is she there to wash Washington’s socks?

  6. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Maybe spending too much time on George Washington’s Hemp Farm.

  7. Bibliomancer Says:

    It’s time travel. You know they’re all going to end up preventing their great-great-great-great-great grandparents from rogering.

  8. Ray P Says:

    Followed by the exciting sequels Thomas Jefferson’s Underpants and Ben Franklin’s Spectacles and Surrender at Yorktown Washeteria.

  9. Tat Wood Says:

    She missed a trick not doing ‘Bill Clinton’s Socks’ and writing a kiddy time-travel adventure about a cat.

    It’s be just as likely to skirt around uncomfortable issues as this.

  10. Ray P Says:

    Jack Kennedy’s Back Brace. FDR’s Leg Irons.

  11. Francis Boyle Says:

    Donald trump’s. . . Er no, even I won’t go there.

  12. JuanPaul Says:

    Don’t worry kids. I’m sure your new foster parents will love you as much as your real parents do.

  13. Tat Wood Says:

    If they want a Newbery Award then Washington has to die about 2/3 of the way through the story.

  14. Anna T. Says:

    Is this a photo from that spot at the Smithsonian where you can get a photo of yourself making it look as though you’re in that painting, Washington Crossing the Delaware? It must be.

  15. Ray P Says:

    Regarding Washington’s death, everyone knows he was replaced by Adam Weishaupt of the Bavarian Illuminati at some point.

  16. Tor Mented Says:

    As one of the later entries in the series, ‘Monica Lewinsky’s Dress’ was not appropriate for children.

  17. Tat Wood Says:

    Three or four schoolkids could probably do a better job of running a naval campaign than John Paul Jones did.

  18. GSS ex-noob Says:

    I really don’t think Gen. Washington would have taken children who were strangely dressed, talked funny, claimed to be from the future, etc. in the boat while crossing the Delaware (Nor that GW stood up in the boat, famous painting aside). He and his socks would have dumped them at a farmhouse, orphanages and mental asylums probably not available in the middle of the war.

    @Ray P: The sequel was supposed to be called “Ben Franklin’s Boots”. One wonders if the kids were sent to the past by some mad scientist/alien with a foot fetish. But I think it ended up as “George Washington’s Spy”.

    “George HW Bush’s Broccoli” wasn’t a best-seller.

  19. Tracy Says:

    I don’t think this is so bad. Except the little girl looks like she has frozen to death.

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