Frickin laser beam isn’t frickin cauterizing his frickin exploding face.
That’s what happens when you choose an ammo belt for fashion and not practicality. You quickly run out of bullets in the never ending battle to defend your virtue.
Well, at least Dagmar von Bazoomba paired some reasonably sensible running shoes with her completely impractical everything else. Pity she didn’t take the extra five seconds to doubleknot the laces, though.
I’ve been trying to figure out what’s up with that frickin’ laser, and JuanPaul’s comment has helped me. I think it’s not a straight laser but a Space Amplifier Transmuter™️. That is, he shoots the gun into his ear where it amplifies his brain activity and transmutes it into a focused beam of powerful neural energy which he then aims by using his eyes to direct the beam. It’s quite effective. The only drawback is that the energy levels melt his face off, so really it’s restricted to one usage per person.
A kid in a red anorak has climbed into the idol’s eye with a super-soaker and is assaulting the archaeologist dance-troupe. Their choreographer, in the foreground, is recovering from falling from a jet.
Dagmar von Bazoomba is definitely a Barbie doll, as @JuanPaul and others have noted. Her legs are coming out of her hips and bending in ways humans don’t, plus her waist is the same size as her head, meaning she has no internal organs. Basically, her entire lower half is improbable. The only part of her that doesn’t match my old “Twist and Turn Barbie” is the sensible shoes, and I’m not 100% sure of that. I literally could put my Barbie’s legs into that exact position, since she lacked knee joints and her legs just… bent.
Is DvB the “forbidden thrills” promised by the blurb?
That is definitely a green, extra-armed, laser-eyed Tor Johnson.
Who are the two (three?) people at the back who aren’t being lasered? They might have some Sir Mix action going on. I think one of them’s a damsel as well.
Ewww. I embiggened it and saw the gore falling from “my head asplode” guy’s face. That’s quite some laser.
@GSSxn—Ooof! The perils of un-embiggened decoding. What I now see is face gore I had previously thought was some sort of stylistically rendered ray gun! Guess I have to scrap my whole Space Amplifier Transmuter™️ theory.
Is one of the three people closest to the idol taking a picture? GSS, it looks to me as if they somehow haven’t noticed it’s face-melting activity yet.
“Wow! Look at all that ‘ting’!”
“I gotta take a pic!”
“Did you two hear a ‘goosh’ sound?”
A: That depends on the specific country you’re in. In Saudi Arabia, for example, it’s forbidden to experience the thrill of flirting with women. In America, it’s forbidden to experience the thrill of flirting with women.
December 12th, 2018 at 9:40 am
Frickin laser beam isn’t frickin cauterizing his frickin exploding face.
That’s what happens when you choose an ammo belt for fashion and not practicality. You quickly run out of bullets in the never ending battle to defend your virtue.
December 12th, 2018 at 9:53 am
The secret origin story of Trump’s hair.
December 12th, 2018 at 10:29 am
And to think he was worried about the seagulls.
December 12th, 2018 at 1:38 pm
Well, at least Dagmar von Bazoomba paired some reasonably sensible running shoes with her completely impractical everything else. Pity she didn’t take the extra five seconds to doubleknot the laces, though.
December 12th, 2018 at 1:41 pm
“That’s the last time I go on a date with a giant green ogre. My god, he was just—all hands! I barely got away with my cleavage intact.”
December 12th, 2018 at 2:21 pm
It’s Tor Johnson! He’s gone beserk. And jade.
December 12th, 2018 at 2:21 pm
Did the artist literally use a Barbie doll as his reference? If so, did he melt the face off of a Ken doll using a magnifying glass?
December 12th, 2018 at 3:04 pm
You know that idol is valuable. He’s covered in tiny Tings!
December 12th, 2018 at 4:32 pm
I’ve been trying to figure out what’s up with that frickin’ laser, and JuanPaul’s comment has helped me. I think it’s not a straight laser but a Space Amplifier Transmuter™️. That is, he shoots the gun into his ear where it amplifies his brain activity and transmutes it into a focused beam of powerful neural energy which he then aims by using his eyes to direct the beam. It’s quite effective. The only drawback is that the energy levels melt his face off, so really it’s restricted to one usage per person.
December 12th, 2018 at 4:54 pm
Another botched Lasik surgery.
December 12th, 2018 at 5:13 pm
It looks like one of her legs has gotten dislocated. Either that, or something completely inexplicable is going on with her pelvis area.
December 12th, 2018 at 5:31 pm
@Anna T. – Quick anatomy quiz: is that her left or right leg?
December 12th, 2018 at 5:33 pm
Believe it when the Sacred Idol of Joe Besser says, “I’ll harm you!”
December 12th, 2018 at 7:14 pm
A kid in a red anorak has climbed into the idol’s eye with a super-soaker and is assaulting the archaeologist dance-troupe. Their choreographer, in the foreground, is recovering from falling from a jet.
December 12th, 2018 at 10:52 pm
Dagmar von Bazoomba is definitely a Barbie doll, as @JuanPaul and others have noted. Her legs are coming out of her hips and bending in ways humans don’t, plus her waist is the same size as her head, meaning she has no internal organs. Basically, her entire lower half is improbable. The only part of her that doesn’t match my old “Twist and Turn Barbie” is the sensible shoes, and I’m not 100% sure of that. I literally could put my Barbie’s legs into that exact position, since she lacked knee joints and her legs just… bent.
Is DvB the “forbidden thrills” promised by the blurb?
That is definitely a green, extra-armed, laser-eyed Tor Johnson.
Who are the two (three?) people at the back who aren’t being lasered? They might have some Sir Mix action going on. I think one of them’s a damsel as well.
Ewww. I embiggened it and saw the gore falling from “my head asplode” guy’s face. That’s quite some laser.
@Tag, we need another tag or two.
December 13th, 2018 at 3:58 am
@GSSxn—Ooof! The perils of un-embiggened decoding. What I now see is face gore I had previously thought was some sort of stylistically rendered ray gun! Guess I have to scrap my whole Space Amplifier Transmuter™️ theory.
December 13th, 2018 at 8:52 am
“Yo! Back here, guys – damsel in distress? Yeah, yeah, giant face-melty idol, but I think I have my legs on backwards.”
December 13th, 2018 at 8:58 am
Is one of the three people closest to the idol taking a picture? GSS, it looks to me as if they somehow haven’t noticed it’s face-melting activity yet.
“Wow! Look at all that ‘ting’!”
“I gotta take a pic!”
“Did you two hear a ‘goosh’ sound?”
December 13th, 2018 at 4:13 pm
@Alice: Good question.
September 5th, 2019 at 8:34 pm
Q: What exactly are “forbidden thrills”?
A: That depends on the specific country you’re in. In Saudi Arabia, for example, it’s forbidden to experience the thrill of flirting with women. In America, it’s forbidden to experience the thrill of flirting with women.
September 6th, 2019 at 7:09 am
Not to be confused with the damned city of the lost.