Badger Books are the bomb! Stinkbomb. We’ve gotten a number of Badger covers over the years, most of which have sat unused (mainly because Tag Wizard couldn’t meet the high bar we set for alt-text humour). So we figured if we piled enough Badger Books into one heap they would reach critical mass and burst into flames, solving our problem.
So let’s have a go at our first Badger Books Megapost. Today’s theme is
Damsels in Distress,
or, Badger those Babes!
or, BEHIND YOU! RUN!
The Girl From Tomorrow
U.F.O. 517
Night of the Black Horror
Mind ForceGood Show Sir Comments:
1. “I come from the future to … rock your world!”
2. Whence did they come? Thence must we run! Hence.
3. “Get away from me, Nerd!”
4. This is where you’d expect to find Bow-tie Man!
Thanks to Marvin and Roger T. for sending these bad boys in.
Published 1961, 1965
(Average: 6.27 out of 10)
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Lastest Tweet
February 28th, 2019 at 9:57 am
1: “I’m whacked, do you mind if I just collapse here?”
2: “Quit throwing chicken feeders, Adamski!”
3: It may be a night of black horror for you, but it’s a moment of wonderful inspiration for a manga artist.
4: Hey, two sets of identical twins! What are the odds?
February 28th, 2019 at 10:25 am
1. It’s just a planet. No need to run.
2. Run
3. RUN!
4. Oh no! They’re doing the spotlight dance. RUNNNNN!!!!!
February 28th, 2019 at 1:16 pm
1. That ginormous hypodermic syringe seems a wee bit awkward to use on a patient.
2. Bad King Whenceslas initiates world conquest.
3. Make her an obvious transvestite and you have the ultimate Ed Wood production.
4. Don’t often see a random 7 ft man in an hysterical crowd stampede.
February 28th, 2019 at 3:49 pm
2. “No way! Not three probes in one day.”
February 28th, 2019 at 4:01 pm
I wonder if the UA or their children got to apply the India Rubber Stamp of Meline Approval, or if that was the preserve of Mr(s) Badger themselves. And did he think carefully about where it went (its a different place on each one), or shut his eyes and stamp randomly. Perhaps we shall never know.
February 28th, 2019 at 6:34 pm
1. The girl from tomorrow has travelled in time to tell the girl from today to put on jeans in the morning.
2. “Dammit, Henry, these flying hubcaps! I told you we shouldn’t by a house next to a freeway!
3. Did questions marks cost extra in the early 60’s?
4. Starring: Marcello Mastroianni, and Marcello Mastroianni, and introducing, Marcello Mastroianni!
February 28th, 2019 at 7:02 pm
1. See, this is how you do the twist.
2. No, this is how you do the twist.
3. You’re both wrong—THIS is how you do the twist.
4. Those who open the cover of this book will feel their minds melting without them.
February 28th, 2019 at 10:22 pm
1. She came from a future where women wear sensible shoes and stupid skirts.
2. Who cares whence they came? All you need to know is that the 517 UFO is all stops to Wolf 359 and then express to Procyon.
3. Formless? Seems like quite a bit a bit of form there, especially when that dress finally slips off. Oh, are you sure this book’s not called Attack of the Sentient Boobage.
4. Panic! at the tea dance.
March 1st, 2019 at 12:41 am
Badger Books brings you Moderately! Alarmed! Women!
1. She came from a strange land of long thighs and short calves.
2. From inside the hollow Earth, you ignoramus.
3. Brains aren’t formless, and when fresh they’re about as damage-resistant as scrambled eggs. Perhaps you are getting your giant brain confused with The Blob?
4. Looks more like eyeball force to me.
March 1st, 2019 at 2:49 am
1. Her proportions are *so* weird – not only short calves and long thighs, but her neck is a few inches too long and Her head seems too big. And is that a submarine in the green glass globe that’s BEHIND YOU, lady?
2. They came from the land of cocktail dresses and ballet flats! Oh, you mean the UFOs!?!
3.That’s not a brain. That’s a furry octopus….
4. Woman in lower right: “Oh my. There goes Leo again with his tacky mind-control rays…”
March 1st, 2019 at 4:04 am
@Hammy;
1. Clearly a result of future evolution gone wrong!
4. She _does_ have more a “I forgot to take the souffle out of the oven!” or “Oh dear, George is wearing a lampshade and heading for the piano” look than a “OHGOD MY BRAIN IS MELTING” look.
March 1st, 2019 at 4:10 am
You can’t fool me, they’re ALL by Fanthorpe, right? It’s the one thing I know for sure. 2/6 was the cost, and 2 days, 6 hours was the max he spent on each one.
Bow-Tie Man is supremely perfect on #4!
#1: her strange culture forgot to put buttons on that front seam placket thingy like we did here on Earth.
@fred, regarding #3: I’ve looked at the boob shape and the middle of the neck, and you’re correct. I’ve got suspicions about #1 too.
Badger Books: Everything’s BEHIND YOU!
March 3rd, 2019 at 5:02 am
@GSSxn (prev.):
1. She *does* have a rather square chin, as opposed to a more lady-like pointed chin.
As far as buttons are concerned, maybe her culture was just way more advanced in using snaps instead.
March 4th, 2019 at 5:42 am
@Hammy: I see no evidence of snaps either, but am willing to concede that they might be there. If so, she’s using them completely wrong. They’re too tight at the top, unsnapped and gapping along the middle of her ridiculously long thighs, and yet tight down around her presumed knees. She and her skirt are completely unprepared for whatever or whenever she’s doing.
March 5th, 2019 at 7:17 am
I love the fact all the women look only slightly put out and not terrified as these situations suggest.
March 8th, 2019 at 4:33 pm
Do you understand how hard it is for me to look at Cover #2 and not make a Trump joke? Can you fathom how much I must struggle to avoid making that cheap, obvious comment? Can any of you realize, how much a man can hurt inside?
March 8th, 2019 at 4:35 pm
@ARY: We’ve all been there. Each and every commentator has wrestled with this very issue.
March 13th, 2019 at 2:35 pm
The first three covers look like all the girls were doing the twist, but got interrupted by a planet, ufo, or alien….you know the usual stuff.
March 14th, 2019 at 4:19 am
They might have been attempting The Twist in the nightclub in #4 before whatever that is happened, too.
“come on baby, let’s do The Twist… BEHIND YOU! RUN!”