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Jan 07

Cover yourself up women, yer distracting me horse!Click for full image

Most covers only hint at cleavage. Where we will succeed will be in the tactic of placing an actual topless women on the cover! Riding horse back along an alien desert. Oh, and she is being lead by a sort of Apache Indian bloke with an extremely long sword. And yes, I mean a literal sword.

Thanks to Craig!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.85 out of 10)
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27 Responses to “Flight to Opar”

  1. little mi Says:

    ooo… naked lady and naked man, something for everyone!

  2. SI Says:

    What is the women using the whip for? It doesn’t seem long enough to hit the dude, and surely hitting the horse would just annoy it.

  3. CSA Says:

    …. there’s even a naked horse! ooooooh yeaaaaaah!

    I love the illusion that the horse is floating about 10cm off the ground

  4. Simon Says:

    Made me think of Avatar for some reason. A poo-brown avatar rather than a blue one but Avatar nonetheless.

    Perhaps this would look better in 3D too. And with more tails on the people and legs on the horse.

  5. CSA Says:

    Haha, too true; you may enjoy reading:
    http://www.dump.com/2010/01/06/proof-that-avatar-is-actually-pocahontas-in-3d/

  6. little mi Says:

    It is called Flight to Opar (why is it that only the last word in the title is underlined). That obviously refers to the flying habits of the local horses.

  7. Tom Kratman Says:

    Apparently both this and its predecessor, Hadon of Opar, had different covers for different editions, at least one version of which for each had a bare breasted woman on it. Personally, I think this one has much better jugs: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/images/0879976373/ref=dp_otherviews_0?ie=UTF8&s=books&img=0

  8. Tom Kratman Says:

    Hmmm..it also appears, from this: http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.pjfarmer.com/bimages/fto2.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.pjfarmer.com/ftothumbs.htm&usg=__VcjLrCTyy1WtM8HjXiHnNeH45io=&h=521&w=308&sz=50&hl=en&start=2&um=1&tbnid=eebz2aSeWBV3tM:&tbnh=131&tbnw=77&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dflight%2Bto%2Bopar%26ndsp%3D21%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26um%3D1%26ie%3DUTF-8 that the jugs are a British adaptation. That’s why there’ll always be an England.

  9. CSA Says:

    The first one is pretty bad. It just goes to show that maybe both the stupidly long sabre and the the naked chick are actually important story points.

    The British one looks likes for a totally different story though

  10. Simon Says:

    @Tom,

    We have our traditions, yes.

  11. Alessandra Kelley Says:

    So… The humans are both pretty much naked.

    Which means she’s riding a galloping horse naked. The bounce alone makes me cringe with sympathetic pain.

    Oh, and she’s riding sidesaddle!. Except of course she isn’t. Real sidesaddle has a special saddle with a sort of post you hook your knee over for stability, because riding sidesaddle is, frankly, stupid, and you need all the anchoring you can get. She’s just sideways draped over the back of the horse, which doesn’t look like it has a saddle or bridle.

    From its shadow, the horse is galloping. So that woman (and shouldn’t her hair be at least disturbed?) with no saddle or bridle or stirrups should be sprawled in the dust somewhere a hundred yards back.

    He is running, with no leg or foot protection of any kind, right in front of a galloping horse, holding an unsheathed sword. Don’t those hooves look ominously hard next to his vulnerable feet?

    He is running flat out. Is he swinging his arms to help his momentum, thus risking slicing himself, the horse, and the girl to ribbons, or is he running while holding his sword arm stiffly out in front?

    It’s like a fantasy-style public service message of What Not to Do.

  12. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Is she being eaten by her cowl…?

  13. David Cowie Says:

    Where is space sheep?

  14. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Fantasy Horses do not follow the rules of real horses. The Fantasy Horse Rules are:
    1. A horse can gallop for an indefinite time without rest, food or water.
    2. You can ride a horse in any manner, without the aid of stirrups or saddle.
    3. A horse will never kick its user — its loyalty is unshakeable.
    4. A horse never takes a dump.

  15. Tom Noir Says:

    Does it look like both their faces have been photo-shopped on, or is it just me??

  16. anon Says:

    @Tom Noir: It looks to me the characters and the background are magazine cut-outs, but yeah, their faces seem to have been cut out separately.

  17. THX 1139 Says:

    Whatever did he do to be banned from the horse?

  18. Leak Says:

    “Lady Go Die Far”?

  19. fred Says:

    It’s like a cosplay version of those Eadweard Muybridge stop motion photographs.

  20. Adzel Says:

    Two Mules for Sister Sarah, Bene Gesserit edition.

  21. Bruce A Munro Says:

    “Wait a mo – it’s flight _to_ Opar, not away from!”

    The man either has antennae or a silly hat. He also seems to be wearing a ruff shaped like a satellite dish with multiple dangling yellow tags, and either his torso is strangely wrinkled and painted red and blue or he’s wearing a tie-died shirt and no pants.

    (The artist seems fond of red and blue: aside from his torso, the woman seems to be sitting on a red and blue striped blanket, and has in her right hand either a worm, a party favor, or a really long fingernail striped in the same colors).

    As mentioned by earlier commentators, the whip doesn’t make sense if it’s being used on the horse: if it moves faster, it will just overrun sword-guy. Is the horse refusing to keep up with him? Or perhaps she has the whip and her robes are open because she’s taking a little self-flagellation break?

  22. Tat Wood Says:

    I didn’t realise Marty Feldman made any westerns, least of all soft-porn ones.

  23. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Looks like that sword is slicing up the horse’s front legs pretty bad. Any second now Lady Go Die Far is gonna tumble onto her naked arse.

  24. GSS ex-noob Says:

    So much orange. Or so much sepia. Whatever. You can tell this is set in the past thanks to the color.

    @Bruce: Looks like antennae on Weird Head Runs With Horse. I’m betting the whip is for her own personal use, because you’d have to be a masochist to ride a galloping horse without any chestal support or pants. Not that I expect she’s going to be on that horse very long. Which may be Weird Head’s plan — he’ll be back on the horse any minute now.

    @fred, @Adzel, @Tat: GSS!

  25. fred Says:

    If the camel is the ship of the desert then going by the title this horse must be the plane.

  26. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @fred: so the guy is towing the horse until it reaches takeoff speed, like a big kite? The woman really better fasten her seatbelt.

  27. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Bruce: Maybe the horse and the lady ARE a big kite!

    It’s never going to be aerodynamic (thus it’s only a few inches off the ground), but making them all one 2 dimensional piece of art solves all the “naked woman on a horse with no tack or support” problem.

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