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May 10

This will teach you for gawfing in front of a lady!Click for full image

Adam Comments: Soooooo, the editor must think blonde women in clingy semi-transparent dresses are either mutants, misfits or genetic mistakes.
Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.72 out of 10)
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31 Responses to “Planet of the Gawfs”

  1. Theo Says:

    Well, they do sunburn easily.

  2. Adam Roberts Says:

    You now that anxiety dream, the one in which you’re about to fight a beardy prospector and his blonde doxy, and you suddenly realise you forgot to put your trousers on?

    Yes. That.

  3. SI Says:

    Teenwolf! Nooooooooooo!

  4. THX 1138 Says:

    Isn’t “Gawfs” what Goofy says?

  5. Claire Says:

    Why isn’t she worried about the giant spider thing climbing up her leg?

  6. Phil Says:

    I wonder if Paramount Pictures knows that the cover artist stole the space station from Star Trek’s “The Trouble with Tribbles” episode:

    http://www.forbiddenplanet.co.uk/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=4_467_575&products_id=56099

  7. fred Says:

    That is the space station from Star Trek – The Trouble With Tribbles ep.

  8. SI Says:

    Phil, Fred. You’re actually right. Excellent space station knowledge!

  9. Dave Van Domelen Says:

    Well, the blonde is a genetic misfit, because his name is Carl.

  10. Smith Says:

    The ash heap of the galaxy – a world of mutants, misfits and genetic mistakes.

    What, so its set in Rotherham?

  11. A.R.Yngve Says:

    It was the ash heap of the galaxy
    – a world of mutants, misfits and genetic mistakes!
    PLANET ABOTTABAD

  12. A.R.Yngve Says:

    It was the ash heap of the galaxy
    – a world of mutants, misfits and genetic mistakes!
    PLANET OF THE GOP PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES

  13. A.R.Yngve Says:

    It was the ash heap of the galaxy
    – a world of mutants, misfits and genetic mistakes!
    PLANET PARADISE HOTEL

  14. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Winner of the Troglodyte Award for most sexist cover!”

  15. deano Says:

    Just couldn’t stop focusing on the “Deathgift” spine in the background. I mean… What a crappy gift, right?

  16. Jane Says:

    It’s always tee time on the Planet of Gawf.

    [Good one about the presidential candidates, A.R.]

  17. Smith Says:

    Is the lizard man saying “oof – right in the space nads!!”?

    In fact is “gawfs” a euphemism?

  18. Del Says:

    The blonde is neither a mutant nor a genetic mistake. She’s just doesn’t fit in with them and has to be escorted off the planet ash heap of the galaxy.

  19. Brian Says:

    And isn’t that the Ymir from 20 Million Miles to Earth?

    http://dvdtalk.com/dvdsavant/images/2350ymir.jpg

  20. Don Hilliard Says:

    @Smith – I think “gawfs” is a euphemism for skinny teenagers wearing black and lots of eye makeup, if one lives in Chatham.

    Is lizard-man side-bum acceptable?

  21. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    In this corner we have Lion Man. And in the other corner we have Lizard Man…oh wait, Lion Man has pulled a fast one, he seems to have used his voluptuous manager as a distraction for Lizard Man and used his laser blaster to take Lizard Man unawares! Lizard Man sure is going to feel that one in the morning…

  22. Matthew Snope Says:

    It was the ash heap of the galaxy
    – a world of mutants, misfits and genetic mistakes!

    Wal Mart

  23. Phil Says:

    Brian: it DOES look like the Ymir, but on a bad hair day.

  24. arch9enius Says:

    GAWF!! is clearly what the surprised lizard guy is saying. Or it could be short for Gerrorff! which might have started tha whole incident.

  25. Dalton H. Says:

    Smallest planet with large gravity since Super Mario Galaxy

  26. Lorelei Mission Says:

    Del is right: that non-mutant female is indeed a part of the story in the book. Shooting a lizardman with a raygun, however, does not occur in the book.

  27. A.R.Yngve Says:

    I tried to say the title of the book three times in a row — now I’m in hospital.
    The pain, the pain…

  28. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘No! Waylon Jennings shot my husband in the gawfs!’

    Needs a ‘hunkbutt’ tag.

  29. Tom Noir Says:

    I appreciate that they’ve taken care to make the aliens/mutants/misfits look like guys in bad costumes from early pulp films.

    No seriously, I appreciate it. This cover is aces and I would gladly hang a poster on my wall!

  30. FearøfMusic Says:

    This might be the winner for the worst weapon wielded ever. Whatever form of projectile it’s firing appears to already be in a descending arc within a few feet of leaving the barrel. Lizard man could have won the fight by standing off a bit and chucking rocks at them.

    Lady-“Ow! Another rock! Shoot him already! ”

    Man-” I can’t! The crafty bugger is staying out of range! ”

    Lady-” Aagh! What do you mean out of range? He’s hitting us with rocks! ”

    Man-” We’ve met our match! The Gawf have the technological edge! ”

    Lady-” He’s throwing rocks you hirsute moron! How is that technology? Good God! How did you master interstellar travel? ”

    Man-” No one throws rocks at you in space. Ouch! Run lady, run! “

  31. A.R.Yngve Says:

    It was the ash heap of the galaxy
    – a world of mutants, misfits and genetic mistakes!

    PLANET OF CHINESE AIR POLLUTION

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