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Jan 12

HA! Look guys I touched his nipple while falling to my death!!Click for full image

Jaouad Comments: HULK ANGRY!!!! HULK THROW ALL HIS ACTION FIGURES ACROSS ROOM!!!
Published 2007

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.23 out of 10)
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34 Responses to “The Long Twilight”

  1. THX 1138 Says:

    “RARR! This halfhearted cover quote make me so MAD!!!”

  2. SI Says:

    It was all fun and games climbing on the big monster. Until a cat jumped on it’s right hand and scared the crap out of it!

    Look carefully 😛

  3. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Discerning people have always read Keith Laumer for a lot of reasons […]”

    Talk about a back-handed compliment…!

  4. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Oh, and by the way, the cover is the artist’s interpretation of
    “Edited By ERIC FLINT”.

  5. Alessandra Kelley Says:

    Does it look to you like he’s yowling because one of the falling humans has punched him in the left nipple?

  6. Tom Noir Says:

    What I like about it is, it’s so subtle.

  7. Jon Says:

    Trust me, if the Twilight movies had featured this guy, they wouldn’t have felt so long.

  8. Yoss Says:

    It might be the cat, SI, but I’m inclined to blame the bear in his armpit. That always puts me in a bad mood.

  9. SI Says:

    Yoss> You just blew my mind! This picture is amazing!!!

  10. SI Says:

    There’s also a guy in a thong just above the bear. This is a picture that just keeps giving!

  11. Phil Says:

    What kind of creature is this? The scales of a reptile, the moobs of a mammal. No wonder he’s so mad.

  12. Yoss Says:

    I know!!!! Look waaaaaay in the back (above the “L” in Flint) and there’s what appears to be some kind of livestock.

  13. fred Says:

    You have a totally logical reason to paint a dwarf hanging from a giant nipple ring and don’t do it. This discerning people is NOT delighted.

  14. Jerk of all Trades Says:

    Great, this kraken sprays people from his nipples.

  15. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    The woman beside the guy touching his nipple looks to be doing a somersault while plunging to her doom…I guess if you have to go, you may as well go in style!

  16. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    Those are some serious abs….I wonder who his trainer is.

  17. Tom Noir Says:

    Is that a housecat falling down near the bottom? I think so…

  18. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @FearofMusic—isn’t this another arrow in your “weird pecs tag” argument quiver? Certainly seems to be, with those nips and all . . . .

  19. Rachel J Says:

    @Tom– do you mean the animal falling towards “edited by ERIC FLINT”?

  20. Tom Noir Says:

    Yes. I think that’s storied housecat and sci-fi cover denizen Orson.

  21. Jaouad Says:

    There’s another one on the monster’s right hand, just left of David Weber’s faint praise. This one seems much more in control of its situation, so it probably isn’t called Orson.

  22. A.R.Yngve Says:

    The more I read the review-quote blurb, the more disturbing it sounds… Who the hell are these “discerning people”? Is it like “right-thinking people”? Or “People who are fussy about what to read?”

    Eh? Eh?

  23. Ray P Says:

    Bob ended his AD&D campaign in style by having Dagon show up: total party kill, hirelings, followers, trained attack bears, the lot.

  24. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Let’s hearken back to the blurb, first mentioned by @ARY many moons ago.

    “Discerning people have always read Keith Laumer for a lot of reasons […]”

    Although none of those reasons ever had anything to do with discernment.

  25. Ryan Says:

    Swole Lizardo was displeased when the party of adventurers activated their portable Tesla coil just inside his right wrist.

  26. Bruce A Munro Says:

    OK, so you have a cover in which a whole bunch of characters from the stories within are fighting a giant monster [1]…and losing? I think AR Yngve is right, the monster must be a metaphor for the editing job that threw together this turkey of a collection.

    Laumer is,,,uneven, even his stuff from before the stroke. Looking at the table of contents, ( https://www.baen.com/Chapters/1416521097/1416521097.htm ), the only one I clearly remember reading is “Night of Delusions” and that’s a book written before his stroke that reads like it was written by someone suffering from a stroke.

    [1] Looks more like the Abomination https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abomination_(comics) than the Hulk.

  27. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Oh, yes, this could only be…

    BAEN!graaarrrr

    The exploding orange type would have tipped me off before even getting to the picture. And the ubiquitous Weber. Wonder if he sent “improved” versions of the stories to Flint? I’m now blind from trying to read the blurb.

    Is everyone at the publisher completely color-blind? At least in the cover layout department? (We know nobody there has taste)

    Still, at least Orson the cat gets work. Posing nicely, unlike his plummeting stunt double.

    I don’t remember Laumer ever writing a story about random characters vs. an extra-giant Marvel character, but I’ve missed some. I agree with @Bruce that @ARY’s right, the monster is a metaphor.

    @BC: Like me, you interpret the quote as meaning “Discerning people have always read Keith Laumer for a lot of reasons […]” and the […] consisted of “mostly because they like guilty pleasure schlock sometimes.”

  28. THX 1139 Says:

    Trouble at the Baen nail bar.

  29. Francis Boyle Says:

    Discerning peoples’s head just exploded. And speaking of explosions this cover is subtle for a Baen in not having any. I mean clouds FFS. You’re not going to win the 14 year old boy market with clouds.

  30. fred Says:

    Perhaps the only cover in BAEN history where the women wearing nothing but(t) thongs are not the centerpiece.

  31. Ray P Says:

    “POOL’S CLOSED!” screamed the behemoth.

  32. JuanPaul Says:

    And thus begins the impeachment of Donald Trump.

  33. Tweet Jane Says:

    Here’s a shout-out to all the little people!

  34. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Francis: No explosions, no female boobs, no giant weapons, a man in a thong — their usual audience will be puzzled.

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