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Aug 29

And there we go... her hand fits perfectly on his ass... perfectly...Click for full image

BookWench’s Art Direction: Okay, so this just looks like two nipple-less people standing there exposing their inner wrists. How do we make it more “Faith of the Fallen”-y? Uhm, how about chucking a craftsman in there, admiring his nipple-less handiwork?
Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 3.62 out of 10)
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29 Responses to “Faith of the Fallen”

  1. Phil Says:

    Terry Goodkind, the only author to have a Venn Diagram as the second letter of his surname.

  2. Pat Says:

    Unfortunately the classic marble of Praxiteles usually known as “Yer Looking at Mi Bird, Knob?” has been lost for centuries.

  3. A.R.Yngve Says:

    A rare example of 21st-century Nazi sculpture.

  4. Smith Says:

    “No, its not a skirt, its a sarong, actually!”

    Nice prong, too.

  5. Adam Roberts Says:

    Terry Goodkind’s classic HATPIN OF THE GODS!

  6. fred Says:

    There be nipple here.

  7. Lilah Says:

    That statue’s actually described in rapturous detail in the book itself! See it here: http://www.journalfen.net/users/white_serpent/13545.html

  8. THX 1138 Says:

    “You can call me… Michelangelo! Not *the* Michelangelo, obviously… a Michelangelo…”

  9. Tat Wood Says:

    Thanks to Lilah for that rhapsodic description. ‘The man’s body displayed a proud masculinity. ‘. Obviously, they couldn’t depict that on a book-cover.

  10. Lilah Says:

    Maybe they couldn’t directly show his proud masculinity, but he is holding a fairly impressive rod. That can’t be unintentional.

  11. Jane Says:

    Tablecloths are all the rage for the fall fashion season.

  12. Jerk of all Trades Says:

    Yes, these crappy, derivative statues that are intended to represent the soul of humanity itself are sculpted in the form of persons of white northern European extraction. This is due to the many personal failings that the people who brought us this book painstakingly included in its creation.

  13. Book Wench Says:

    @ Lilah and Tat Wood – come on, admit it- “The man’s body displayed a proud masculinity” isn’t from this book, it’s from 50 Shades of Grey, isn’t it?

  14. Smith Says:

    Coulda been worse. Coulda been the statue of the woman displaying proud masculinity.

  15. Jaouad Says:

    The way he holds that staff, I suspect the man’s proud masculinity would be reflected quite clearly in it’s er… knob, if it weren’t for the Ting.

  16. Tat Wood Says:

    In that context, his right fist and her left one look more than usually interesting

  17. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    I call this masterpiece “For the love of masturbation”! Notice the hands, how they are perfectly shaped for physical stimulation…

  18. Alex Says:

    What a terrible book, too. It’s the one that made me abandon the series.

  19. S. Peterson Says:

    Anyone who’s read this knows that this image is a perfect rendition of a scene in the book where the main character looks at his finished sculpture (exactly specified and painted in true-to-the-author’s-idea detail) which inevitably helps the people in this story realize that their lives suck due to the oppressive government and rebel leading to his freedom. Sorry, spoiler alert…. This cover is spot-on even if it does have a lot of black space and looks a little old-school. Any author could only wish to have an artist this attentive to his story. This one was probably my favorite in the series as it explored a huge amount of the world or the series that wasn’t really ever used before with some very interesting characters being fleshed out.

  20. Tom Noir Says:

    Hold onto your hat, sir. All covers on this site are user-submitted, so SOME-body thought it was a bad cover, but that doesn’t mean everybody did. As you can see by the rating beneath it, people have actually been quite kind to it. That said, we’re here to snark, please take it all in good fun and is intended. Many of my favorite authors and even some of my favorite books have covers here. That doesn’t diminish what’s underneath the cover.

  21. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    I can’t help but think maybe the artist should have preserved a little more mystery in the cover…left a bit more up to our imagination…maybe by hiding the gentleman behind a curtain…and having the woman seated…in a bear costume…eating a chicken leg…

  22. B. Chiclitz Says:

    We may be utterly humorless, but that’s what makes us the best damn “living statues” in Central Park. Just drop your spare change into that basket beneath my rod.

  23. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Now it’s your turn to hold the pigeon!”
    (It’s an oldie, but it’s still good.)

  24. anon Says:

    One ring-ish to rule them all.

  25. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Ah-ha! ‘Faith of the Fallen’ is in fact an anagram of the real title, ‘HEFT THE NAIL, OFFAL!’

  26. Anna T. Says:

    The artist looks more like the museum janitor to me. That’s what I thought he was at first.

  27. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘HHNNNNNNNG!’

  28. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    They’re rising boldly up out of marshmallow fluff. I think the position of the title was a wise choice.

  29. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Non papillial persons.

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