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Dec 04

You know... you guys could help instead of barely pulling, riding your purple unicorn or even.. STANDING... on it!!Click for full image

GK Comments: Room for another unicorn somewhere?
Published 2010

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.71 out of 10)
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22 Responses to “Knot Gneiss”

  1. Claire Says:

    A mermaid butterfly? How does that work? Does she just flail around in the water? Good old DKS.

  2. Adam Roberts Says:

    The sequel to Knots Gnlanding.

    Showing my age with that gag, I know.

  3. Phil Says:

    A mermaid butterfly I can take, but a GINGER mermaid butterfly on a BLUE unicorn? Preposterous!

    The lady on the right is the least help in this picture. Not only pulling the cart the wrong way – sideways – but with her feet tied together.

  4. Jaouad Says:

    I wonder how the butterfly mermaid manages not to slide off that unicorn.

    Not surprisingly, the grumpy Easter Island moai has covered its eyes with leaves in embarrassment.

  5. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “I am your host Robert Stack, and this is Unsolved Mysteries. Tonight: Were the Easter Island statues built by elves and mermaids?”

  6. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @Phil: she’s adopted. 🙂

    This one’s another Xanth cover, so I’m tempted to excuse it. Then I see that the damsel on the right is posed so that she’s not accomplishing anything except showing the inside of her thighs. Good art direction, sir!

  7. L.B. Says:

    Whoa, is that the unicorn from the ‘Apprentice Adept’ series? Could this be a crossover book?

  8. Tat Wood Says:

    ‘Couldn’t lift it, couldn’t even shift it, we was getting nowhere, and

    so

    we

    ‘adacuppa tea…’

  9. Tom Noir Says:

    Two questions:

    a) Why does butterfly-mermaid-girl need to ride a unicorn? Couldn’t she just… flutter along?

    b) What is up with her GINORMOUS SIDEBURNS?!?

  10. Adam Roberts Says:

    “… I WEEP … I WEEP TEARS OF LEAVES …”

  11. THX 1138 Says:

    “Do you know, I can’t remember why we brought this now.”

  12. Yoss Says:

    It’s probably a fool’s errand to question physics in a scene that features a butterfly winged mermaid with righteous sideburns and riding a purple unicorn… BUT how is that wooden cart supporting the weight of a statue that no doubt weighs thousands of pounds? It also looks extremely top-heavy. With a 2-wheeled cart it would never stay balanced.

  13. fred Says:

    Knot gneiss? Tuff!

    Pun said Fred.

  14. Jaouad Says:

    Yoss @12: A heavy statue? Hah, I see, you think it’s gneiss. But don’t worry, it’s knot.

  15. FearofMusic Says:

    This being a Darrell K. Sweet cover it is generically unrealistic and what not, but still…the yoke is so short the man who is actually trying to move said unbalanced cart would have to take tiny little steps. Even then the wheel would probably catch his heel. While the two women make things even more difficult.”What? Not heavy enough. Here, I’ll jump on the cart while she pulls sideways upon it.” How long ddo you think it was before he used that huge sword of his to bring the journey to a tragic but personally satisfying end?

  16. FearofMusic Says:

    Just out of curiousity..are there any DKS illustrations involving non-white humans? If so, do they llook like all his other people with a change of paint/skin tone?

  17. Phil Says:

    I’ve figured it out. It’s a normal(ish) human woman on the back of the unicorn, but she is being attacked from behind by a giant butterfly. And is carrying a dead fish with her. For some reason.

    I still haven’t worked out the sideburns, though.

  18. MrDalliard Says:

    Looks like they’re hauling a load of schist.

  19. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    @Phil you forgot to mention that she has no clothes on….maybe the butterfly stole her clothes and knitted a sweater with the material?

  20. Herm Says:

    The mermaid simply is not balanced. If the tail were her right leg and she had a left leg to match, then yes, she’d be seated comfortably – straight on, that is, not side-saddle. (And indeed, my guess is the pose is stolen from reference of a woman seated on a horse.) As it is, she’s hopelessly lopsided and not even fluttering her rather skew-angled wings at speed is going to prevent her from falling off immediately.

    I have no idea how side-saddle riding works, but my guess is it’s not like that.

  21. JuanPaul Says:

    Something tells me this is high fantasy.

  22. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Today, at long last, I FINALLY got the pun. “Knot Gneiss”… “Not Nice.”

    And now I wish I hadn’t.

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