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Oct 06

HEY!! Those are my leggings!Click for full image

As we all know around this table. There comes a time in every mans life when he just has to, pick up a flute and shake his ass at a redheaded troll figure. So if we have that on there with the troll pointing and shouting angrily at the dudes bottom. Is he jealous? Is he pointing out the guys ass shaking might destroy the fabric of reality? We’ll let the viewer decide.

Published 2005

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.98 out of 10)
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Oct 05

I must look so dam awesome right about now!Click for full image

Well, we’ve got the red on there, ’cause of fire being in the title. We’ve got the epic dragon and the merlin esk wizard with his magic orb. But we’re missing something. Something that’s going to make someone pick up the book and think, ‘this is the one.’ Of course!! Surround the title in an awesome gold shiny goodness!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.04 out of 10)
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Oct 02

How in God's name did you squeeze yourself into that space suit, honey?Click for full image

I need sci-fi mixed in with something suggestive! Yeah baby!! I am talking about tight space suits that make you wonder how they ever got into them. Huge racks and huge packs, if you know what I mean! Guns shaped suggestively like a… you know… *giggles* Whatever you do don’t mess it up with something like giving the women a perm. Are you listening to me?

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.73 out of 10)
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Oct 01

The one peacefully eating that tree. He'll make so many steaks! Mmm MMM!Click for full image

Draw a few dinosaurs and some people jet-packing around the planet. That way we have both words of the title covered. Though, concentrate on the title, huge black box, every word highlighted with something awesome. You don’t know what that means? For God’s sake man, like, put the word ‘Anne’ in an orange diamond shape. That’s the type of awesome I’m talking about!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.63 out of 10)
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Sep 30

And this beast is the one I bravely shot with my sniper rifle from a mile away.Click for full image

I’m thinking book covers are normally so unrealistic. They have things that are so unbelievable it would make your mother cry. Not us! I propose, a photographic quality drawing of a military man placing his shined boot on the head of his latest kill: a giant ant insect alien creature. It will be just like they are back in the great war…. with aliens…

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.71 out of 10)
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Sep 29

I'm not talking to you. Your shoulder pads are better than mine.Click for full image

So I climbed over the mountain peak and made my way through the snow storm. I was close to death and feared I may never see another living soul again. Then I stumbled on the temple, and the great master. There he leaned forward from his mediation. Placing a single flower petal in my hand he whispered, ‘shoulder pads’. It changed my life.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.88 out of 10)
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Sep 28

I can't attack that! Her hair is so 80's!Click for full image

In my life time, I’ve seen dragons vs lasers, dragons vs swords, even dragons vs man-tigers. Where haven’t we gone you ask? Well my dear friend, let me but whisper these words into your ear and pray they don’t start to bleed with pleasure. Dragons vs Concordes! That’s right, with shoulder pads and eighties hair cuts!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.14 out of 10)
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Sep 25

GAHH help me get them out of my head!Click for full image

Excuse me, Sir, there is a phone call for you.

Art Director: Is it ready?
Mysterious caller: It’s more glorious than you could ever imagine.
Art Director: You remembered the…
Mysterious caller: Vampire, Minotaur, Robot, Damsel, Roman man in toga with sword, Angel and death star?
Art Director: Don’t forget Saberhagen.. he must be in there to! Mu hahahahahahaaha!
Mysterious caller: MU hahahahahahahaahhahaaha
Art Director: No… only I may laugh! Mu hahahaahahahah!
Mysterious caller: ………………………

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.92 out of 10)
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Sep 24

What the heck are you shooting at? Land's the other way!Click for full image

A kids’ book? Well you know what kids love: FONTS, terrible fonts – gold outline! Give me: people animals… that’s right, I want a man weasel, man mouse, man rabbit and man mole all on there. Uh, best not make it too cutesy though, give the weasel a bow and arrow.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.08 out of 10)
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Sep 23

Well done Ethan. Who would guess this lovely work could be done by a.. 25 year old man?!Click for full image

The year was 1967… it was the summer of love and we sat the whole team around a field and…… I almost remembered something there…. but it’s gone. When we all awoke three days later we had this.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.06 out of 10)
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