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Sep 26

Masquerades as science fictionClick for larger image

Assassin of Gor

Masquerades as a romance novelClick for larger image

Nomads of Gor

John NotnormalClick for larger image

Marauders of Gor

Good Show Sir Comments: Acting on a tip, we wasted an afternoon browsing the visual excesses of John Norman book covers over at “The Complete John Norman“. So many editions, all terrible in their own way. But one edition had a special style of terrible that makes us sit back, doff our hat, and say “Good show sir, good show, indeed”. Here is the full set, we could have selected any of them for today’s post so I present a random threesome.

1. Asshat of Gor

2. Gonads of Gor

3. The Rotters of Gor

Published 1997, 1998

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.00 out of 10)
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Oct 09

Booty Call!Click for larger image

Mrs Jones Comments: “How to Pick Up Girls” by Conan.

Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.38 out of 10)
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Jun 25

Trick or treat, muthafucka!Click for larger image

Alice Comments: Sucks when the last three guys you met on Tinder get together to compare notes.
Published 1986

 

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.67 out of 10)
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Apr 24

The hookah-smoking caterpillar went thatawayClick for larger image

Sgt Rock vs. AsterixyClick for larger image

It’s a Two-fer Tuesday: Worst of the Best from F&SF

Ace E. Doocy Comments:

1. The FBI Taint Team swings into action.

2. Better add a rocket or they’ll never know it’s science fiction.

Published 1962, 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.00 out of 10)
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Sep 20

Calm down Faux-nan. Don't get your knickers in a twist.Click for larger image

Good Show Sir Comments: Cover art, suitable for framing, from the artist’s website.
From his biography:
Peter died much too soon but at least he was sitting in a bar with a drink in front of him. There are worse ways to go. At his funeral the vicar said he was probably “getting in the rounds” in heaven. I like to think he’s painting there too … He was intelligent and widely read and a regular member of his local pub’s quiz and cricket teams, though he would say that was mainly for the beer! He died in March 1998 in Skegness while he and some colleagues were working on a mural at Butlins, relaxing in the hotel bar after work.

Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.87 out of 10)
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Apr 01

I'm almost done my next anthology: Dangerous Visions, Post MortemClick for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: Harlan Ellison has been promising to publish this for a long time. He allegedly had to wait for all the contributing authors to die off, so he could save money not paying them royalties.

Published 2017

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.82 out of 10)
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Mar 27

Who you callin Puss n Boots?Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Release Notes for Catware 3.7:

– Reduced shedding by 15%
– Catpeople can now wield glaives, halberds, and Beretta AR70s
– Removed ridiculous names from Author Name Generator
– Tail toggle added to preferences
– Text correction: mages cast ‘fireball’, not ‘hairball’
– Runaway reproduction issue now fixed

Published 1999

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.25 out of 10)
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Mar 23

Ye Olde Mom JeansClick for full image

JuanPaul Comments:
“And ye will know them,
Danu’s Children
For they shall be
Until the last
The bearers of
Booty most mighty”

From the ancient scriptures of Mixalot

Published 1984

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.58 out of 10)
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Mar 09

Bronze Axe: The new Axe body spray and bronze tanner. All-in-one!Click for full image

Raoul Comments: Get crackin’, punsters!

Published 1969

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.84 out of 10)
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Feb 14

Adopt-a-Highway by Vlad the ImpalerClick for the E-Z See cover image

Good Show Sir Comments: The E-Z read audio book version plays at 100 decibels.
Published 1967

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.52 out of 10)
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