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Sep 14

Arrrrrr... I'm the only female pirate to wear make-up and have me own teeth!Click for full image

With books today, you know what people are too obsessed with? That’s right, art! Why not (and you are going to love this) just have a female model dressed up as a pirate, teasing a little as she holds her swords to her lofty chest. With the addition of a terrible font we’ll draw a completely accurate picture of how things were like in ‘ye olden days.’

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.77 out of 10)
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Sep 08

Thinking about it, I probably should have worn armour instead of this bikini.Click for full image

Right, with a title like that I mean it’s self explanatory, we’ll put a dragon there. What? A bikinni clad busty women with a bow and arrow? Well I don’t see….. and a space ship? But..but….oh alright then, but I’m going to give the women some furs to cover her shame. And by shame I clearly mean shoulders! Yeahhh! High five anyone? Anyone….?

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.55 out of 10)
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Aug 31

Sorry officer. I use this to.. gut fish. I swear.Click for full image

With such a great confulence of fantasy and romance, we must voyage into a realm of highest art and… ahhh, who am I kidding. Busty red headed women holding her huge dagger! Do not, on your life, forget the glow.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.36 out of 10)
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Aug 28

GAHHHHH give me back Dave from accounting or I will kill you!Click for full image

So with a title like this, one has to be careful. I was thinking of a sweeping landscape and a storm brewing on the horizon. Silhouetted over the coming clouds and setting sun would be some hands in chains and…… Sorry? You just want busty sword welding chicks and a chained male. Ha! Who would approve that?

(Slightly breaks our rules as this is probably comedy – but it is another bank holiday weekend for UK readers! Have fun!)

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.31 out of 10)
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Aug 18

Ok moving into another dimension and... mini skirts! Sweet.. I'm staying here.Click for full image

Pictures cannot describe the shine I want on this cover. Eyes will turn and minds will be altered. I want… NO… I need a guy floating in the air in the ol’ Jesus cross pose having left behind a dimensional portal. Have some dude popping out only to find a sexy women in knee highs and a tight leather dress. It’s just like those magic shows……

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.53 out of 10)
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Aug 07

Shifting between worlds to get a hooker! ohhhh Yeaaa..God I love my powersClick for full image

Some artists define a generation: Picasso, Michelangelo, Paul Klee… I want you to be inspired by their works and create something for me. Think of these things: hookers, cats, bats, stereotype vampires, a real man with long cheesy hair holding his long sword. And to make it art, we place them all…. between worlds! Together, my friend, we will define the next generation!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.66 out of 10)
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Aug 04

Cover yourself up women! Yer distracting my lizard!Click for full image

You know the two things I love: big bosomed women and lizards. Have them woven in an epic battle, lizard versus women as she tries to slice at it with her magical blade. Don’t go all crazy on me though, concentrate on the boobs.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.73 out of 10)
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