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Jan 06

PCP man... AWAY!!!Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: I want a cover that oozes manliness from every pore! And I want to see those pores! I want to smell the musky odor of that manliness! I want to bathe in it as it drips down my naked, strapping torso beneath the scorching gaze of a skullsplosion! KABOOM!!!
Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.84 out of 10)
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Jan 05

Sorry about the delay in posting! I would like to say the New Year was full of alchomohol but unfortunately it was full of coldy flu-y illness!

It’s been a crazy year, full of server crashes, fighting with corrupt databases, resurrections and return to nearly former glory! Just want to say thanks to all who have stuck around and I still love laughing daily at all your comments!

Also just want to thank the Tag Wizard who has been a huge help to me this year! May it continue on over 2016! Happy New Year!!

First, the top rated cover of last year:

We have trained him wrong... as a joke.Click for original post

The Tag Wizards Chosen favourite:

Dude... that is one awesome nipple!Click for original post

And my chosen favourite from the year:

Sir I'm picking up something permed coming into orbit.Click for original post

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.73 out of 10)
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Dec 21

How do you like my... MOUSTACHE!! Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Good Show Sir Comments: I’m sorry Sir, we just can’t have passengers on this bus reading… whatever that is you are reading. You’ll have to get off at the next stop. But… know where I can get a copy?
Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.50 out of 10)
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Dec 16

Oh sorry were you whipping me? I fell asleep...Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: “Very well Mistress Raven, I want you to whip me gently until I am hit with my next great cover inspiration. Don’t spare the buttocks. And remember my safe words: poul anderson.”
Published 1980

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.45 out of 10)
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Dec 07

I don't even want to think about Australia’s view!Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: I want a naked man, and he’s playing with these two blue balls. No, no, I’m saying he’s handling two massive globes. Don’t make ’em the same size, one is bigger than the other. Have him straining, concentrating intensely. Look, I don’t see what’s so funny about this.
Published 1968

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.93 out of 10)
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Nov 26

Is that a Men in Black Noisy Cricket gun?Click for full image

Tat Wood Comments: “Allo, oui, c’est vous Monsieur Siudmak? Ah, bonjour, nous avons un livre que je devrais acheter un… um… we need a cover, comprend? C’est pour ‘The Stars Like Dust’. Er… ‘Les Etoiles Ame le Poudre’. C’est un histoire comme Genghis Khan mais dans le Nebula de la tete du… er… chevaux? Un grand nuage dans l’espace qui semblaient un… oh, there go the pips”
Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)
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Nov 09

Put your sword away... this looks like a creature we can work things out with.Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments:  “I now pronounce you ThighMaster representative and wife!”
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.26 out of 10)
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Oct 26

He goes for the DUNK! AND HE SCORES! Click for very slightly larger image

Hammy Comments: I’m not sure how he’s wearing that in outer space…or holding onto a planet, for that matter. But who cares, MUSCLES!
Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.92 out of 10)
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Aug 28

Ewwww... just look at them. I don't even know why you invite them over for dinner in the first place.Click for full image

Scott B Comments: Creepy eyeballs! (Also, broccoli hair.)
Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.84 out of 10)
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Aug 21

Has she stopped looking? I really need to stop sucking in this gut. Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: I want a sexy space princess trying hard not to ogle a slab of beefcake. Have her cleaning out her earwax or something.
Published 2000

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.35 out of 10)
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