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May 01

Seriously? Don't look Merman... you'll just encourage her!Click for full image

DPN Comments: I couldn’t resist buying this one. I hope this cover is an accurate depiction of a scene in the book, because I really want to know what’s going here.
Published 1984

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.79 out of 10)
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Apr 08

The plume of smoke was later arrested for indecent touching... Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Now THAT’S what I call a smoking hot body! I’ll get my coat.
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.53 out of 10)
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Apr 03

Look I maybe an alien entity of fire... But I ain't dating a girl with only four digits!Click for full image

Bibliomancer’s Art Direction:OK so you painted an awesome space fire monster, and the iron moons are cool, and you even got the starfield in the corner, but aren’t you forgetting something? Yeah, girl ass. And make it blue. She’s an alien. You think these paperbacks just sell themselves?”
Published 1971

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.69 out of 10)
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Feb 19

And thus... the first time travelling flasher was born... Click for full image

Sara Comments: Here I am, just stepped out of my mecha-techno, time-traveling, chrome, orb-y…thing. The only drawback is that it destroys all clothes that are not right gloves or right boots. Swords are not clothes so they’re all right, too. Also it makes weird shadows stick to you. Wait, am I floating above a strange river?
Published 1958

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.94 out of 10)
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Feb 12

Noooooooo!!!!! Your fine buttocks shall be avenged!!!!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Daniel Comments: Bought this gem in an second-hand bookshop last year. I was slightly embarrassed taking it up to the counter. It’s rubbish on a number of levels: it’s a literally awful bit of artwork; it’s artwork that bears pretty much no relation to the story; and said story is a sombre dystopian yarn by Christopher Priest, a renowned purveyor of genre-crossing, award-winning novels that have more recently been reprinted by Gollanz with classy covers.
Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.78 out of 10)
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Jan 09

You hear about the english man fish assassin? He got battered! Ah ha ha... sorry...Click for full image

Joachim Comments: Doing the fish dance! Steps: 1) make sure you have a fish head, 2) limp wrists, 3) and a steady gurgle.
Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.44 out of 10)
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Dec 21

I hope you showered miss!! That's delicate advanced scientific equipment you know!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: You know what I would love reading in public… a book with a fully naked women on there. Tied down to some sort of Sci Fi chair… yeah… If anything it shows my literary intellect.
Published 1977

Well that’s us for Christmas folks! We’ll be back for an Old Year Sum Up on the 31st!
Happy holidays!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.07 out of 10)
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Dec 20

Just going for one of those, butt in the hell-light walks...Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: I expect hell will be similar to my Friday night… naked and flexing my fine stuff! HEYOOo… high five? High five…? No? Ok… but seriously, I want a bum on there. You can draw mine, I shaved and…. what… No? Ok… just get Ron from accounting, he works out.
Published 1982 (maybe)

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.14 out of 10)
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Oct 31

Wait.. who gave you underwear? Let me get those off you and my experiment will be complete!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Glenn Comments: An alpha male, a naked lady, a cautious beta male, and a 1950ies era high tech explosion. It’s a time capsule. A horrible time capsule.
Published 1958

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.45 out of 10)
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Sep 25

Dude... I thought chasing a naked women couldn't get stranger... look at that guy dancing on rubbish!Click for full image

Vincent’s Art Direction: So here’s what I’m thinking. A man and a woman in a landfill. I want the woman tastefully nude, so have the man covering her naughty bits even though they’re standing about twenty feet apart. Lastly, have an army of giant preying mantises coming over the hill.
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.33 out of 10)
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