Good Show Sir

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Jeweleya Comments: This cover is so off-putting to me that I can’t bring myself to read the book. A few highlights –

• The sword dissolving into blue dust
• The barbarian’s barely-decent rags (it’s refreshing that the woman is wearing more than the man, for once)
• The utterly generic, swirly, rainbow-threw-up-on-it background
• And my personal favorite: the horse that looks like it’s just been flung backwards from a giant slingshot

…Indeed, a cover for the ages.
Published 1978

Many thanks to Jeweleya!

(Average: 7.13 out of 10)

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Don Comments: “Helmets with bunny ears will overpower helmets with horns every time. So sayeth Ason the Incredibly Bored!”
Published 1973

Many thanks to Don!

(Average: 6.78 out of 10)

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Danielle Comments: The title phrase says – One man against a wonder planet. Yeah. I wonder why these guys are dressed like some weird bird-fetish group. I wonder why one is holding a ray gun, while the rest have swords. I wonder why they have to have a bird emblazoned on their chest. I guess it’s in case someone misses the fact that they’re full grown men dressed as giant birds
Published 1963

Many thanks to Danielle!

(Average: 8.50 out of 10)

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I have been enjoying the delights of Helsinki this week and I have had a wonderful time. Well, except for the price of beer! 7 Euros for a pint! It makes me want to cry!

In honour I decided to search through a couple of the book shops here for the Finnish versions of some popular Sci-Fi and Fantasy. Some of them are just a little odd and a couple do make me laugh.

I hope you all enjoy these wonderful covers!

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(Average: 6.60 out of 10)

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Stevie Comments: Samuel Delaney’s Neveryona is so-over-the-top hetero soft porn. And the lead character is supposedly gay! What a bubble butt he’s got! I wish I had one of those! And what’s he doing with that giant sword, anyway?
Published 1983

Amazing! Many thanks to Stevie!

(Average: 8.00 out of 10)

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Noah Comments: …
Published 1977

Many thanks to Noah!

(Average: 7.90 out of 10)

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Ashton Comments: Everything about the closer man’s outfit is amazing, from his puffy velvet shirt covered with large gold buttons and trousers striped with red and blue, to the leopard print trim on his girdle. The other man’s garbage sack outfit is no match.
Published 1982

Many thanks to Ashton!

(Average: 6.91 out of 10)

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David Comments: It took me a long time to notice that the naked red man with spikes on his feet and a horn in his forehead is holding his sword in a rather odd way.
Published 1973, 1974 & 1975

Many thanks to David!

(Average: 7.60 out of 10)

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Tom Noir’s Art Direction: Okay, this book is heroic Celtic fantasy, but the question is how do we sell it to the ladies? I’ll tell you how: full frontal nudity. What do you mean we can’t – okay, fine. Throw some strategically placed splashes over it to please the censors. But just so people get the picture, fill the remaining cover space with pictures of swords.

Published 1993

You might remember this from here.

Seriously, why do all these guys shave their body hair?
Amazing! Many thanks to Tom!

(Average: 8.63 out of 10)

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Jessie Comments: This cover is so atrocious that every time I go to read it, I just can’t. It’s definitely among the top three worst covers I’ve ever seen.
Published 1995

That is epic. Simply epic! Thanks to Jessie!

(Average: 6.94 out of 10)

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