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May 01

Murky Murk and the Funky BunchClick for larger image

RachelJ Art Direction: “This is no ordinary novel. Not even a “A Novel”. This is… “A MOSAIC”. I want every element of the cover– title, subtitle, font, artwork– to blend harmoniously into one vast, resounding “WTF”.

Do it justice, my boy.”

[Note: It’s not my camera. The cover image is just really, really dark and murky and it’s hard to tell what anything is.]

Published 1990

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.91 out of 10)
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Apr 02

Any other strange body parts?Click for larger image

JuanPaul Comments: Oh Baen, will you ever cease to amaze us?
Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.82 out of 10)
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Mar 22

Magazines, franchise books, paper dolls and “non-fiction” occult. We have a potpourri jamboree here for another in our continuing series of Honourable Mentions. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

 

Now add a pinch of PicardClick for larger image

Erik Tollstedt Comments: I want an image of Ernest Hemingway. He should be sitting on a purple couch in outer space. There should be papers flying away from his lap. Also, I’d like to see Ernest Hemingway’s head explode. But not in the normal way. It should explode into several other heads, one of them a sleeping hispanic man, and the other Emperor Ming. And have some sort of purple beam shoot out of his brain too. Yeah, that will convey “creative genius” like nothing else.
Published 1990

 

Laser RhodanClick for larger image

Lillie Awesome Comments: When the party supply store attacks.
Published 1972

 

You look great! Let's head to the sushi barClick for larger image

GSS ex-noob Comments: Why don’t you post more of my covers?
Published 2017

 

Conjure Wife-swappingClick for larger image

Theresa Comments: The satanic black mass orgy happpened so fast that it was just a blur.
Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.67 out of 10)
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Jan 31

A tinfoil hat would block those space waves!

Click for larger image

Good Show Sir Comments: “Hey! You! Climb down off the seafood buffet!”

Published 1971

Thanks to Sérgio for sending this in!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.31 out of 10)
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Nov 23

Whack-a-Mole: The NovelClick for larger image

Marge Comments: My eyes! The burning!

Published 1972

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.00 out of 10)
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Aug 24

Faces are so hard to paintClick for larger image

Alice Comments: “The sewer’s backed up again. Let me clean up this mess before we do our virgin sacrifice!

Published 1983

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.50 out of 10)
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Apr 12

No I don't want a balloon ride!Click for full image

Good Show Sir Comments: Don’t tell me I have to die for these blobs’ sins!

Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.54 out of 10)
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Nov 16

Walking on tentacles? That's just cilia!Click for full image

Tag Wizard Comments: And needless to say: Amateurs in Artistry
Published 1952

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.36 out of 10)
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Aug 01

The catch-of-the-day is quite a dishClick for full image

Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Comments: ‘Gilligan’s Island’, a SyFy epic

Published 2016

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.29 out of 10)
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Jul 06

You've had a busy day little man. Time to go to 'sleep'Click for full image

Bibliomancer Comments: They hired the robot nanny and housekeeper because Dad kept getting caught cheating with the female help.

Published 1959

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.55 out of 10)
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