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Dec 05

Hold on one second dude... look what's checking into the hotel... a black blob with a wizard stick!!Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Well it’s a busy anthology so we should keep things busy on the cover. This is for Focus magazine… and we all know they only want one thing on their free book… mannequin cleavage! Just fill the rest with whatever you feel like.
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 6.45 out of 10)
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Sep 27

When the School of Medicine accidentally meets with the LARP'ing society!Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: It’ll be just like our D&D game we played last night… except John from Accounting can be the hunk attacking a skeleton… and Dianne the Receptionist can be the sword-wielding damsel in a cape!
Published 2000

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 7.83 out of 10)
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Jan 08

And thus... the moon became her personal lollypop... Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: No no no… I said more glow! And more Ting! And more of the horse looking like he’s awkwardly floating over a field!
Published 2011

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 6.86 out of 10)
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Aug 29

And there we go... her hand fits perfectly on his ass... perfectly...Click for full image

BookWench’s Art Direction: Okay, so this just looks like two nipple-less people standing there exposing their inner wrists. How do we make it more “Faith of the Fallen”-y? Uhm, how about chucking a craftsman in there, admiring his nipple-less handiwork?
Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 3.67 out of 10)
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Mar 16

Dentistry of the future!Click for full image

Craig Comments: Ultimate because they can’t smell you apparently.
Published 1990

Many thanks to Craig!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 8.95 out of 10)
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Mar 09

OYE!! Kali! What have I told you about photocopying your face!?!Click for full image

Dorian’s Art Direction: Kali, eh?  Goddess of death and destruction?  It’s not exactly…well, friendly, now is it?  I tell you what.  Make the cover pink. Bright pink.  That’ll be more…cosy, like.
Published 2008

Many thanks to Dorian!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 4.91 out of 10)
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Dec 17

Yep... children's programs are definitely being written on more LSD than normal.Click for full image

Artist: What ya want chief?
Art Director: Ever seen a baby staring at bright flashing colours or the TV? Well draw that type of face! Except floating disembodied through space.
Artist: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit taking amphetamines.
Published 1990

You might remember me from here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 8.85 out of 10)
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Jun 09

Worst date ever... and you call those flowers?!Click for full image

Richard Comments: I recently bought some books from the wonderful (and charming) Gwyneth Jones. Gwyneth’s site you should have a look; she gives the money less p&p to Amnesty and her books are tremendous. She signed the book with the message requested, but had also written notes about the cover art. In this one, “This delicious cover is my own fault, I talked to the artist. Never do that!” Not entirely sure what’s going on, though – it seems that Ben Affleck has really pissed off that woman.
Published 1997

First floating heads, now full bodies!
Many thanks to Richard!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 7.81 out of 10)
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May 26

It's too early. My mind can't make sense of anything on this thing.Click for full image

David Comments: I haven’t read this, so for all I know, centaurs and one-eyed jellyfish are essential to the plot. The S in JONES was cut off by the printer, not by me – it wraps round the edge of the cover (this is a hardback). The scan makes the colours look a bit more lurid than they really are. Published by Victor Gollancz, 1970

Another Heinlien! I’m flooded with them.
Thanks very much to David!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 7.47 out of 10)
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Apr 02

Wrong... just wrong...Click for full image

Nothing – and I mean nothing – attracts readers more than naked children. What.. why are you looking at me like that? Why are you leaving? Guys? Guys?

Thanks to Dave R – The ever-living!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 8.60 out of 10)
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