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Jan 21

Looks like I picked the right war to shave my arm pits! Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Frog people, monkey people, fish people and lizard people? It’s like it’s Tag Wizard’s birthday!
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 8.26 out of 10)
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Oct 26

If you think these cards are strange... you should see space Top Trumps!Click for full image

Durbin Comments: Book officials were shocked when it was revealed that an elderly parishioner had painted over a deteriorating fresco with a haphazard splattering of paint. “The once-dignified portrait now resembles a crayon sketch of a very hairy monkey in an ill-fitting tunic,” one official says.
Published 2010 (maybe)

You might remember this from here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 7.13 out of 10)
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Feb 14

All children with very defined square chins are drafted into military service.Click for full image

Mangraa’s Art Direction: We need a different cover for the Vor Game! Do that, “soldier being led to jail”, scene we talked about. Only make the prisoner a clone… no, a SMALLER VERSION clone of the Captain!  Genius!  And make sure the Captain smells what mini-clone did while crossing the Captain’s path.  Irresistible!
Published 1990

You might remember me from here

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 6.97 out of 10)
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Nov 09

Scary uncle, still ruins every photo.Click for full image

Nix Comments: You may recognise some aspects of this cover. The huge glowy face on the left? That, I think, is Tung: I suspect Miles is the other glowy face. In the book, Tung’s never described as having any kind of moustache, and it would fit poorly inside a combat helmet, but hey, Eurasians all look like Ming the Merciless, right? Right?
Published 1997

You might remember me from such covers as The Vor Game.
Many thanks to Nix!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 6.82 out of 10)
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Apr 06

I hate these family photos, there's always the scary uncle in the corner.Click for full image

I love the realism, so we’ll definitely have to get that on there. In fact I think we should tone it down a little. We’ll keep it simple so it’s not too bad (and almost like it’s creeping up on its prey) then WHAM! We’ll hit them with a gold black red title banner!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 6.62 out of 10)
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Oct 08

She made us stand like this till someone turned up to see how awesome we are.Click for full image

WELLL! How about Lois sitting on a rocking chair right next to a lovely log fire with a couple of cats curled up nicely beside her. To amplify the warmness we’ll have three people in space-age uniforms standing right best her, one of them holding a laser rifle. And for the finishing touch, put a mustache and bandana in there too.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 8.79 out of 10)
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Apr 01

Face it John, you can't draw trees!

Click for full image

WEELLL!! How about a guy in a space ship pointing at some futuristic map.  Hmmm, yeah, you are right, it’s just not sci-fi enough! How about putting in someone with a straight bowl hair cut, and a huge werewolf creature with botox lips?!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of artI would touch it without protective glovesI have seen worse. Far, far worseInteresting, but I would still read it in publicMiddling: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lamé picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show, Sir.... Good Show! (Average: 5.90 out of 10)
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