Good Show Sir

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You know what’s on the way back in terms of being considered manly? Pink! That’s right. So we’ll have a lot of it. And on top of that epic dose of man we’ll add more layers of manliness. A crewcut, a crossbow and most importantly a stomach wound. That’s one large slice of man-cake for your eyes.

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You know what a book cover can never have enough of? That’s right chum, text. Lets fire as much on there as possible. And possibly some worm creature being attacked by guys with guns. But that’s secondary, no in fact it’s tertiary, to the fonts with their various marvelous colours and shapes.

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Ok! What would gods normally do, while inhabiting the body of a busty half naked women? Hmmm, how about standing by a sweet tower glowing oddly, on all fours in front of some sort of cat creature and swinging a sword about to decapitate a snake. Gods are all about the sexual innuendo! Yeaaaaahhhhaaa!

Thanks to David D!

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There’s only one thing in this world that can make a muscle infused man in a loincloth and his scantily clad female faint almost instantly. A naked red headed minotaur who is sneezing at them. Just remember, the sure fire way to success, keep the clothes to a minimum!

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So this is the cover I came up with, what do you think? Tim? Paul? Guys? Did you like the inclusion of the berries, the half skull, and subtle heart monitoring line? The large glowing atom in a circle on the dudes head? I’ll take your silence as a yes.

Thanks to CSA!

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You know what I love when admiring the female form. If only they’d put on a robe, a death mask and pick up a scythe. Man, if we draw a women like that. Why are you looking at me like that guys? Don’t tell me you’ve never thought of it before. No? Really? Oh.

Thanks to CSA!

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I’ve heard on the grapevine that science fiction slash fantasy readers only want one thing. Naked women! What’s with that, eh? What we need are dudes. The type that make you feel really uncomfortable. No mention of fantasy or anything. Just a dude and… The Quest!

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You know the two things that make everything look fantastic? Glow and blur. The best photoshop tools money can buy. So we’ll have a glowing blurry tattooed man with a wolves head! And some girl with some glowly blurry transparency around her. Make sure the title is huge and don’t forget to blur what you can.

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OH OH OH! Let’s have a half naked man grasping his magic electrified sword around waist height. That sounds suggestive? Of course it is, he’s holding a sword right next to his baby maker. A ha ha ha. Don’t forget to overload the whole cover with text, a lot of text, in all shapes and sizes.

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You know what you thought? You thought, you’d seen everything anyone could possibly do with a dragon. Well, you’re wrong. Three words for you to eat today, ‘Dragons In Space’! Oh yes, and trying to decipher the controls of a space ship! I mean, dragons can read, right?