Good Show Sir

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A kids’ book? Well you know what kids love: FONTS, terrible fonts – gold outline! Give me: people animals… that’s right, I want a man weasel, man mouse, man rabbit and man mole all on there. Uh, best not make it too cutesy though, give the weasel a bow and arrow.

(Average: 4.16 out of 10)

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Word association game: say the first two words that come into your head when I say “Sci Fi”. Laser guns? WRONG! It’s cat people! Eat your words! Though, lasers… not bad actually. Add them in with some weird cloaked alien holding a gun. Might help distract from the fact we have friggin’ cat people on there.

(Average: 5.34 out of 10)

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Hey guys, well I have the chips, beers, d20’s, cigars ….. and so I told them for the cover just put a large cybernetic cat man pondering meanly into the distance whilst standing in the midst of an exploded wasteland. *coughs* Why are you looking at me like that? …. Oh right, I forgot the dip!

(Average: 8.16 out of 10)

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You know what people are into these days… dressing up like strange animal creatures. So put a couple of people talking to some weird bunny person.. just like the convention we were at last week! Except less of the, you know, horrible single 45 year old men looking for sex. Take away from that with a huge space ship in the sky with the author’s name printed in horrible fonts.

(Average: 8.35 out of 10)

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Sometimes I stop and wonder, “what if man evolved from cats?”. Like that guy from that sci-fi show but much more furry! We could have them just standing around hugging, scratching and talking with a space ship in the background and a robed alien stepping down. And you just know that they are thinking, “What did this guy evolve from, San Francisco?” hahahaha.

(Average: 7.27 out of 10)

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HOLY mother of HADES I have it! Ready? How about a big muscled LEOPARD MAN! Holding his rifle and roaaaaaaring off to one side….. YAWHAAT!?!? No I don’t want to see his leopard genitals! Put in him some futuristic combat armor, but no leggings.. his crotch is right there!!! God can only dream of how good this will be……
also known as Prescription For Chaos

(This is special! Have a great Bank Holiday weekend! Well, for those in the UK! 🙂 )

(Average: 8.55 out of 10)

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You remember in the Falklands when the British fleet attacked the Argentinians? Just like that, but imagine the Argentinians were reptiles! And have a large reptilian eye staring at the ass of a busty not-very-clothed women who’s casting chain lightning. I know… I’m physically excited too!

(Average: 7.93 out of 10)

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Let me paint a picture for YOU my friend. Image the world but not as we know it… where man evolved from… CATS!!! No not the musical! Ah forget it just put a couple of ridiculous cat men with spears on the cover with a huge werewolf thing in the background ready to pounce.

(Average: 6.83 out of 10)

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WEELLL!! How about a guy in a space ship pointing at some futuristic map. Hmmm, yeah, you are right, it’s just not sci-fi enough! How about putting in someone with a straight bowl hair cut, and a huge werewolf creature with botox lips?!

(Average: 5.74 out of 10)

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Art direction: Right, so give me a dirty big white werewolf on top of an open space ship with some guy laying dead. Have the werewolf carry a bag of water or something and, you know, just make the whole thing look generally terrible.

(Average: 8.05 out of 10)

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