preload
Oct 15

I have been enjoying the delights of Helsinki this week and I have had a wonderful time. Well, except for the price of beer! 7 Euros for a pint! It makes me want to cry!

In honour I decided to search through a couple of the book shops here for the Finnish versions of some popular Sci-Fi and Fantasy. Some of them are just a little odd and a couple do make me laugh.

I hope you all enjoy these wonderful covers!

Am I supposed to be missing a finger?Click for full image

RunClick for full image

Well, we haven't gone off the map, more onto it.Click for full image

Its hard to see how badly photoshopped this one is.Click for full image

What luck.. they sent the blind soldiers after us.Click for full image

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.60 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

Sep 09

For the love of god could someone please get this bird off my head!?!Click for full image

Jen Comments: This photo doesn’t really do justice to just how wrinkled the man is. But hey, it’s Merlin (I think). He can wear a Godawful headdress and stand in the middle of the ocean if he wants to.
Published 1979

Many thanks to Jen!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.86 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

Sep 03

Up UP and AWAYYYYYY!Click for full image

Baen Books – Putting all other cover choices to shame since 1983.
Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.63 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

Aug 31

He may be the evil sorcerer Zog, but he can put on one hell of a fireworks show.Click for full image

Stevie Comments: Jack L Chalker’s Songs of the Dancing Gods cover is bizarre! Crazy wizards, super sultry fairy-women in red and green and a huge mack truck running thru everything. What’s all that crazy action supposed to tell the prospective reader?
Published 1991

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.40 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

Jul 29

The real lynx effect....Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: Okay, this is a Celtic fantasy, so obviously we want a buff surfer dude who is spaced out of his gourd. What? I dunno, put him in a kilt or something. You figure it out, that’s what you’re paid for isn’t it? Anyhow, magic it up. Slap a shiny silver border on with the author’s name in a clashing red font to distract suspicious readers. Anyhoo, I gotta jet, it’s 4:20.
Published 1993

Many thanks to Tom!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.45 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

May 19

phhhoarrr Moses had some incredible thighs!Click for full image

Well after CSA’s comments yesterday with Mr Ellison I noted he said this, “We should post a pic of the Bible tomorrow and see if Jesus posts within 24hours.”

I decided to take him up on that suggestion with this, sent into me about a year ago. And to Mr Ellison, I sent CSA to bed last night without super and I didn’t even read him his nightly install of Harry Potter verses Terminator. Thanks for commenting!

A real cover will be posted later!

Good Show Sir, Good Sir.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.88 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

May 10

Get into that ship or you'll have to sleep with the fat ewok!Click for full image

Hex Comments: The guy on the left is a sort of expert undercover first contact agent, whose job is to alter the course of developing cultures on newly-discovered worlds to suit the needs of Earth. How he manages to do it while being chafed by that jockstrap I will never understand. Sometimes I gaze at the Yeti in a jumper while I try to figure it out.

Incidentally, this book is spattered with grimly bad black and white illustrations that completely contradict the style of the cover. Nice work, Ace!

Excellent! Thanks Hex!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.27 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

May 07

Leather-clad, slightly camp biker warrior to C6 please.Click for full image

Richard’s Art Direction: Ok, I want the devil playing chess on a life-size board with warriors from different periods of history. Don’t forget to throw in a few other random characters, at least one man must clad in leather and a scarf and find a spot for a woman in a bathing suit with a parasol. Then make it from the perspective of an opposing chess piece. Yeah, those should all come together nicely.

Excellent! Thanks to Richard!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.10 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

Mar 31

Good Show Sir, good show!Click for full image

NoiselessPenguin Comments: I tried to make a list of what’s wrong with this cover, and stopped when I realised: EVERYTHING.

Thanks to NoiselessPenguin, I’ve never laughed so much!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.62 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with:

Mar 17

Uh, I have a question...why did I have to shave most of my body hair off?Click for full image

Naked people? You’re right, we can’t have two yellow glowing buck-naked people standing on some far away planet, with the man pointing upwards towards some awful green moon that takes up 80% of the cover. Oh I know, cover their jibblets with some storks. And we’re sorted!

Happy St. Patricks day! – Good Show Sir

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.03 out of 10)
Loading...

Tagged with: