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Mar 02

Who let all those cats into the steam room!Click for full image

MisterBob Comments: One for the ladies?
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.67 out of 10)
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Feb 10

Crystal answer me... why did I buy such a big dish washer?Click for full image

Rachel J’s Art Direction: Mark, *nothing* happens in this yawn-fest, so let’s go with the general girl-power-in-space-with-crystals theme from the earlier books. Pink-and-purple colour scheme, huge embossed title in neon yellow, rocketships, chick in the foreground holding up a sparkly rainbow crystal. Oh, and make her look awed. What? No, I said “awed”, not “bored!” But hey, “bored” works too.
Published 1993

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.64 out of 10)
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Jan 04

Happy New Year!

Well another year is here, I am just about over my hang over and of course back in work! So it’s time to start again and see what exciting covers we can find to brighten our days. Last year didn’t see a cover which had the power to beat, I Sing the Body Electric. But maybe this year… maybe…

Thanks to everyone who has sent in covers and comments! You all bring such entertainment to our lives. And of course thank you to all those amazing publishers, without you and your art direction where would Good Show Sir be?

Last year was very exciting now that I think about it. And my quest for terrible Sci-Fi/fantasy book covers also led to the best conversation ever in a second hand book store.

Shop Assistant: Wow.. that cover is so bad!!!
Me: Yeah isn’t it? That’s kinda why I am buying it actually.
Shop Assistant: Really? Awesome. You should start some sort of website to show covers like these.
Me: I have…
Shop Assistant: ……
And nothing more was said. Here is the book I bought.

The top rated cover of the year:

Bum chins are well known for invading the rest of your face.Click for original post

A Personal Favourite:

The dangers of eating radioactive fish.Click for original post

CSA Chooses dragon crotch!

Carry On films did get a bit... odd...Click for original post

And of course, how could we not mention the cover that started a censoring legend:

I know space ships don't need to be aerodynamic but...Click for original post

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.00 out of 10)
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Nov 10

Everyone else is wearing leggings here! Why can't hawks do it? eh!?Click for full image

Tam W’s Art Direction: This is a great work of fantasy, so naturally we want it to look as retro, cliched and formulaic as possible. I’m talking men in tights! If you do decide to depict a wizard turning into a bird, don’t forget to catch him in the act. And make it man-sized, never mind what the novel says!
Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.92 out of 10)
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Oct 28

*German accent* I'm here to cast a spell of heal light wounds... *bass guitar*Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction:
“Are you sure you’re a licensed massage therapist?”

“Of course dear, now just relax and let me work. Your thighs look very… tense.”
Published 1986

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.68 out of 10)
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Oct 19

Gwaddd.. stop trying to kiss me. Spello Repulse-o!Click for full image

Tim Comments:This cover had me simultaneously going, “I don’t ever want to be spotted with that book,” and, “Awesome, I need to know what’s going on here!”
Published 2008

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 3.94 out of 10)
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Oct 12

COFFEE!! I need some, can't think of a caption today. New neighbours that have moved in with horrific faces? Ah who cares. COFFEE!!Click for full image

Alessandra Comments: I think they were going for a cutting-edge symbolic look, some sort of classical reference to alchemical historical scholarship. But they just look goofy. Oh god, that eye.
Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.96 out of 10)
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Sep 30

Ouch ouch ouch! Don't cross the thumbsss!!!Click for full image

Muttley’s Art Direction: A Wizard, right? You know, caped, with magic sparks or something. Big Hair (TM) too.
Published 1986

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.23 out of 10)
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Sep 21

No... what have you done with ET?!?Click for larger image

Joachim Comments: It’s one of these covers where words simply fail to describe the horrors at play — the garish colors cavorting among mutated humanoid shapes (Malcolm McDowell?) and what can only be a doe-eyed, disembodied, (potentially) cuddly dragon spirit monkey…
Published 1986

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.60 out of 10)
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Sep 16

A He-mullet and a cat-suit! You are out done sir alien thing, hand over the weapon! Whatever it may be!Click for full image

Adam S Comments: So this is what He-Man sees when he’s tripping on acid.
Published 1964

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.88 out of 10)
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