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Jul 11

Somone's been on the Tesco own-brand bourbon again!Click for full SHOCKINGLY INDECENT image

Jon Comments: I know those Moorcock/Mayflower covers are like shooting fish in a barrel, but I needed something to go with my chips. I actually got the man himself to sign my copy recently and I told him I felt the film version was underrated. He agreed with me, with the minor change of “under” to “over”. Seemed a nice bloke, though.
Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.58 out of 10)
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Jun 29

Damn this magical nakedness. No need for the censor sheep yet again!

Joachim Comments: Girl with strategically placed stars (of course). Chola eyebrows and bleached blonde hair with walking shark with gill piercing/oops, I mean a chain-leash…. And she has claws of course — see, the cover is derived entirely from the TITLE!
Published 1975

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.18 out of 10)
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Jun 27

The Warriors! Coming to a local leisure centre near you!Click for full image

Art Direction: The real question is, what can’t we put on the cover? I want everything, a dragon, a muscle bound man in tights, a wizard and even a dwarf. Oh and the standard 80’s teenager thrown into a world they don’t understand but slowly come to love. All emerging from a fine mist.
Published 1985

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.20 out of 10)
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Jun 20

RIGHT! Who brought me back after 500,000 years without a penis! WHO!?!Click for full image

Ian Comments: Reach for your gun! A man wearing nothing but a couple of spangly lights has just materialised and is scaring the women!
Published 1966

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.06 out of 10)
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Jun 14

You may be in a protective bubble, but it doesn't mean you can't see me get naked!Click for full (newly unchewed) image

E Comments: According to my husband, his dog chewed up the cover of this book. I think the dog was making a statement. Like why the hell are those people sitting in a hollowed-out asteroid?
Published 1984

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.00 out of 10)
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Jun 13

What can I say... my electricity just knows what to cover!Click for full image

Joachim’s Art Direction: Man, surrounded by flowing white firmamental materials, which conglomerate/emanate at/from his manhood… Everyone standing in awe since he’s floating down steps, or, staring at his….
Published 1968

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.46 out of 10)
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May 30

What can I say, the snake really knows where to rip my clothes!Click for full image

Jen Comments: All I can say is, anyone who actually bought this for the cover is going to be VERY disappointed.
Published 2010

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.31 out of 10)
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May 20

It's either snow on my shoe or icing... either way it was mighty tasty!Click for full image

Art Direction: Look this is the 70’s! Who doesn’t have a LSD induced swirling vision of a womans face while walking around topless and carrying their longbow? I had one last night. Just draw, or you don’t get any happy juice!
Published 1973

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.34 out of 10)
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May 19

No... don't sing a whole new world! It will summon death!Click for full image

Matt’s Art Direction: Fabric! I want to see lots of fabric. And hands, lots of dramatically posed hands. And least one bare breast, only you’ll have to conceal the nipple with something. How about a cross?
Published 1994

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.09 out of 10)
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May 03

Well that was one messed up orgy, I'm off to cut some wood!Click for full image

E Comments: The giant soda can in the background is the clincher.
Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.83 out of 10)
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