Good Show Sir

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Miranda Comments: Disproportionate armed wizard holds some kind of jester-headed marital aid. Cover reads, “it could save the kingdom, and entertain at parties!”.
Published 1989

(Average: 7.23 out of 10)

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Tom Hering Comments: In a land where sculptures flaunt and crumble, one statue comes to life: cat girl! Little does she know, however, that life means nothing but the sight of a bug, and the sight of a bug brings sadness and withdrawal. Oh pathos! Oh cat girl!
Published 1976

(Average: 7.51 out of 10)

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Dead Stuff with Big Teeth’s Art Direction: Gentlemen…perhaps what this cover needs is both a man, and a horse! Yes! And another man with a mullet, showing he doesn’t know how to ride a horse. And… a girl wearing nothing but body paint, standing at the top of a staircase! Because, gentlemen: nobody would otherwise pay money for something a woman has written!
(the senior partners, followed by everyone else in the room, erupt in a perfect storm of applause. The junior copyrighter wipes a tear from his eye)
Published 2003

(Average: 7.37 out of 10)

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Erica’s Art Direction: Weird sea horse creature. Check. Scary-looking sword. Check. Hot warrior woman. Check. Leather Vest. Check. Pants. Uh, what? You wanted me to draw pants?
Published 2005

(Average: 8.09 out of 10)

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John C Comments: Yes, I think we have it in a size 12 in puce, let me just check out the back sir.
Published 1980

(Average: 7.03 out of 10)

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Bibliomancer Comments: Thar she blows! Oh, sorry ma’am. Mistook you for the Leviathan!
Published 1975

(Average: 6.47 out of 10)

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Sara S Comments: This cover has everything. The cat-being is looking out at the reader as if to say, ‘How do you humans like it when we dangle something in front of YOU and then snatch it away, huh?’ The cherry on top of it all is the title artist who thought, ‘Wouldn’t it be great if the preposition ‘at’ didn’t line up with any of the other words on the cover?!
Published 2005

(Average: 7.21 out of 10)

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Tom Hering Comments: From St. John to Krenkel to Frazetta to this. The most egregious example I’ve ever seen of a publisher using an amateur artist to save a little money.
Published 1977

(Average: 8.63 out of 10)

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Frank Comments: This is clearly of the 1970s, a fantasy warrior knife-fighting pose, but in disco dress, with zodiac symbols in the background. And big bugs! Seriously, I looked at it to see if it was an update of “The Radio Man” for the Disco Years. It wasn’t.
Published 1979

(Average: 7.74 out of 10)

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Winged Wolf Comments: An excellent series, and one of my favourites. This scene actually appears in the book, and is depicted fairly accurately. Except for the tentacles. They never get the tentacles right.
Published 1983

(Average: 6.24 out of 10)

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