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May 21

You just straddle it! Don't do... whatever you are doing to it! Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: I have to think of everything around here! Just put Paddington Bear in a cowboy hat on top of a thing… and I really mean a thing! I want readers to stop and say, “What the hell is that thing!?!” Got it?
Published 1970

Many thanks to CH@os!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.41 out of 10)
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Mar 11

Nothing sexier than a huge apple!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: When I said I wanted a New Model Army this is NOT what I had in mind.
Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.32 out of 10)
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Jun 27

Hell wasn't the nicest of places at times, but the local theatre groups tried their best.Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: KITTY! KITTY! Get off my keyboard! If you don’t get off this instant you are going on that cover in hell we’re getting done. Cause that’s where you belong… RIGHT! You’re going on… you are going on there… with Genghis Khan… in hell! That will teach you.
Published 1989

Many thanks to A. Waltz for tweeting this in!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.93 out of 10)
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Feb 12

Noooooooo!!!!! Your fine buttocks shall be avenged!!!!Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Daniel Comments: Bought this gem in an second-hand bookshop last year. I was slightly embarrassed taking it up to the counter. It’s rubbish on a number of levels: it’s a literally awful bit of artwork; it’s artwork that bears pretty much no relation to the story; and said story is a sombre dystopian yarn by Christopher Priest, a renowned purveyor of genre-crossing, award-winning novels that have more recently been reprinted by Gollanz with classy covers.
Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.36 out of 10)
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Jan 21

OH man... I don't know what I ate last night but it's... rainbows!Click for full image

Scott B Comments: Judging by the back cover blurb this one surprisingly is a faithful cover. Except it didn’t mention geodesic-head guy there. But the rest of it, including blue-glow-from-nose man, seems to be taken straight from the book. Still… wow.
Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.66 out of 10)
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Dec 13

Ok lets do this gun fight. Everyone got your... ah who am I kidding. Crane... you are screwed!Click for full image

Marmontoast Comments: Evidently, there really is a bird-like entity in the novel, deciding humanity’s fate. If only it could answer its mobile phone!
Published 1994

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.15 out of 10)
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Nov 13

And so... the war to bring Terry Wogan back to the breakfast show waged on...Click for full image

Scott B Comments: The Civil War re-enacted by radio-antennaed Peter Pan fairies and giant ants.
Published 1964

You might remember this from here!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.39 out of 10)
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Mar 24

Afros need protected in deep space. Skin? Ah who cares!?!Click for full image

Miggity’s Art Direction: Shirtless black dude in tighty whities with a space helmet and a pneumatic fishing spear gun, flanked by two white Amazonian women in see through tops giving the whole thing a weird sex vibe, with a spacecraft carrier, space figthers, four planets and sweet moon base in the foreground… PERFECT!
Published 1981

Many thanks to Miggity!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.43 out of 10)
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Dec 04

Well... here comes 100 years of horrific radiation poisoning.Click for full image

World gets destroyed by large alien disco balls firing lasers. Lasers that create nuclear explosions. Then we’ll have some women in a tight shirt, unbuttoned just enough to tease our readers. And like every other cover out there, she’ll be completely ignoring the fact that there is a mammoth nuclear explosion going off in the background. Women, eh?

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.90 out of 10)
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Oct 08

She made us stand like this till someone turned up to see how awesome we are.Click for full image

WELLL! How about Lois sitting on a rocking chair right next to a lovely log fire with a couple of cats curled up nicely beside her. To amplify the warmness we’ll have three people in space-age uniforms standing right best her, one of them holding a laser rifle. And for the finishing touch, put a mustache and bandana in there too.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.25 out of 10)
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