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Sep 30

Exiled: Clan of the Claw

19 Comments »

Exiled: Clan of the ClawClick for full image

DPN Comments: Cat-man had only moments to reflect on some of the poor decisions he made in his life.
Published June 2011 / August 2012

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.31 out of 10)
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Jul 16

Xanthe and the Robots

26 Comments »

Here my love, you have my heart. No really... take it! It's version 3.4!Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Look all I want is a bald man with a robot heart… a comical cartoon heart! Cause that’s just what crazy futuristic electronic LSD taking engineers would do. The back? People put stuff on the back of these things? Standard woman… and we’re done!
Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.41 out of 10)
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Jun 11

The Dragon Guard: The Magickers #3

35 Comments »

And so, the children avoided being eaten by a dragon... through magical interpretive dance!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Gym class will never be the same again!
Published 2003

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.87 out of 10)
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Mar 14

Fear

15 Comments »

Axe o'clock again... man... time to head back upstairs...Click for full image

Good Show Sir’s Art Direction: Man climbing stairs to heaven, a grandfather clock with an axe for a pendulum. I think there is only one way I can improve this masterpiece… it has to shine… and I mean literally! Get the silver glossy shiny cover people on the phone, I’ve got another one for them to perfect!
Published 1992 (maybe)

Many thanks to Ethan for sending this in!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.08 out of 10)
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Oct 25

Death Trek

27 Comments »

Death Trek's hero later had his damsel taken away from him amid allegations of steroid abuse.Click for full image

MisterBOB Comments: Looks like it’s been over-painted until the paint has turned to mud.
Published 1980

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.86 out of 10)
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Aug 16

Artemis Fowl

20 Comments »

You.. shall... not pass!!Click for full image

Jaouad’s Art Direction: This book is so awesome, there’s only one way to sell it: give it an awesome glittering metallic dustjacket, so everyone is blinded by its awesomeness. Also, make sure no one can read the author’s name.
Published 2002 or 2011

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.50 out of 10)
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Jul 30

Murder at the Galactic Writers’ Society

30 Comments »

Sorry your book continues zero Space Sheep... eject her into space!Click for full image

Jaouad Comments: The Galactic Writers’ Society’s annual outing got decidedly less high-brow as the day wore on.
Published 1995

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.58 out of 10)
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May 03

Home from the Shore

20 Comments »

Earlier versions... lightly illustrated!Click for full image

MisterBOB’s Art Direction: A Conceptual breakthrough book! So y’know the yin / yang symbol, shinny dolphins….
Published 1979

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.31 out of 10)
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Mar 28

The Best of All Possible Wars: The Best of the Man-Kzin Wars

39 Comments »

Cat people boobs... really Baen... Really??Click for full UNSHEEPED image

Tom Noir Comments: Naked cybernetic armed cat woman in an improbable pose bursting through a cover of shiny 3D fonts? This is what happens when cover designers play Bingo. This cover is SO shiny that the camera couldn’t quite deal with it. Pretty much everything that looks black is actually highly-reflective chrome.
Published 1998

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.39 out of 10)
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Dec 14

Northworld – Vengeance

30 Comments »

Everyone loves robot limbo!Click for full image

MisterBOB’s Art Direction: Make the armour shiny… it’s a David Drake book!
Published 1991

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.36 out of 10)
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