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Jul 28

Going to the toilet in a space suit always looks awkward.Click for full image

Jen Comments: You know, it’s been a while since I’ve read this, but you’d think I’d remember the part with the giant mecha vs. super soldier race. And boy, is that shiny.
Published 2001

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.62 out of 10)
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Apr 13

At least these invading alien robots had the decency to make themselves look humanoid!Click for full image

Nix comments: This has an annoyingly shiny cover, so it may be hard to read its contents. It’s an anthology of four famous SF works: _2001_, _The Demolished Man_, _The Day of the Triffids_, and _I, Robot_. As you know, all of these contained city-sized giant mecha and huge explosions (although only two had the giant mecha dive-bombed by rocketships), so the cover is quite appropriate, and obviously is a fine piece of artwork: tasteful, yet subtle. I’m only sending it in because it’s so annoyingly shiny.

Many thanks to Nix!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.93 out of 10)
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Mar 29

I cast my level 4 summon fish spell.Click for full image

Rex’s Art Direction: Okay, gaudy covers are out, minimalism is in! So let’s see, what shall we put on this cover… a fish! Yes, a fish, that’s right, I’m sure they live in forests, right?

Thanks to Albertosaurus Rex!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.18 out of 10)
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Mar 10

Well you know what sucks... my lack of depth perception.Click for full image

Holy crap. We need something to distract from that bright silver font we’re using. So, how about a guy with an eye patch posing with weapons and a women doing the very same thing. Put a moon in the background, and by background I mean most of the cover.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.34 out of 10)
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Feb 26

I found this child all by myself! Get your own!Click for full image

Gwad Darn it, we know from experience realism sells! If you haven’t got some models to pose for you in costume it’s just not going to sell. We’ll grab their attention with a kid hiding behind a sword fighters cape. Then we can make it shiny…

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.37 out of 10)
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Feb 15

Gunner, aim directly for her nasal hair!Click for full image

Look, with this we’re in a win-win situation. How could we go wrong with a space ship going through some sort of light speed travel and the captain pointing at a huge shiny hologram of a person? Just as long as we keep the fonts subtle we’ll be fine.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.17 out of 10)
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Jan 20

As hard as I try I just can't get leather cat suits that accommodate my ridiculous chest!Click for full image

You know what all guns should have? Large magazine, maybe. Insanely large silencer on the end, possibly. A leather clad busty blonde, you’re almost there. Nope? All guns should have a guitar hero controller. When wouldn’t you want to stop fighting and starpower some AC/DC?!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.89 out of 10)
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Dec 14

Engineer!! My tank is fuming purple gas again!Click for full image

Out of the many things I have quoted which people love, I can guarantee there is nothing loved more on a cover than a good nazi! In a tank. With a huge purple nuclear explosion going off in the background. And the cover all shiny. Nothing more my friend. Nothing more.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.16 out of 10)
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Dec 11

Hmm. Why did I think sitting on the tail of this shuttle would be comfortable.Click for full image

Guy sits uncomfortably on the tail of a space shuttle. Don’t forget huge shiny text. And we’ll have to quote another one of her books, something that will really appeal to those hardcore Sci-Fi readers. Oh oh! I know. Dragons of Pern. Ace!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.97 out of 10)
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Nov 05

Damn it they're back. I'll go get the pixie poison.Click for full image

The shine! We are all about the shine. But we’re lacking somewhere, there is just something we need to push the readers right over the edge and into the pit of greatness. Got it! Half-naked faeries and royal elves. Making one of them look like an Elizabethan queen will drive all the boys crayze-Z!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.71 out of 10)
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