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Aug 09

Lipstick... really?Click for full image

Shelley’s Art Direction: We’re looking for a sort of lion-centaur. And a spaceship. And gore. And…could you do something with foreshortened perspective? Thanks.
Published 1977

That is… awesome.
Many thanks to Shelley!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.19 out of 10)
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Aug 06

Stars... how clich. I wanted a double rainbow.Click for full image

Art Direction: We’re all women here and the book is written by women. Isn’t it clear what we need to have on here? A sky of dull looking stars surrounded by silver border. Oh wait… and a woman, who’s a bit pasty looking and has a earring to make all other earrings feel inadequate.
Published 1985

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.86 out of 10)
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Jul 27

You have mighty claws yet you choose a stick to defend yourself?Click for full image

Sarah’s Art Direction: So there’s this guy, right? And he’s a lobster. But not really a lobster! Just has a lobster body. Uh, and really skinny arms. And he’s got a parrot for a sidekick, but get this — the parrot is a lobster, too! You getting all of this down, Steve? Ooh, maybe thrown in one of those “Manamanah” things from The Muppets, too. People love those.
Published 1978

Lets just see who that killer crab from the other day really is!
Many thanks to Sarah!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.02 out of 10)
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Jul 21

I gave him the snips.. mu ha ha ha HA!Click for full image

Rod Comments: Killer crabs. Look, there’s a picture too. Surely this spares us having to read the shity thing?
Published 1978

I have a cream for that…. I’ll get my coat.
Many thanks to Rod!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.63 out of 10)
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Jul 20

But if I am dreaming, why do I need a microphone?Click for full image

Neil Comments: May Day May Day, we have a situation up here. At least I think Im in an aeroplane, maybe its some tech suit. Either way I think we should concentrate on a wolf coming out of the clouds.
Published 1990

Many thanks to Neil!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.05 out of 10)
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Jul 15

I will seduce you with my powers of... interpretative dance!Click for full image

Brian’s Art Direction: What makes vampires scary? Exactly: it’s their lack of proportion. It’s their slightly big heads and taste for late-80s haircuts. Imagine a vampiress Bonnie Tyler. Get to it.
Published 1989

Many thanks to Brian!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.90 out of 10)
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Jul 07

His trouser snake finally got the better of him.Click for full image

Dave Comments: Let’s see. We have a guy in a tree, with a sword, getting ready to lop of the head of a snake, with its head super-imposed against The Moon. Paging Dr. Freud!
Published 1983

Hey, I’ve seen that scene in the jungle book!!
Many thanks to Dave!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.41 out of 10)
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Jul 06

Ohhhh I get it.. no wait what...?Click for full image

Corwin Comments: Where to start… A truly wretched color scheme with a bright pink neon title, two title fonts that go in four different directions. Then the rest of the cover is way too busy including a blue shark, a green sub with pink polka dots, and a man hole cover. And lest we forget, the story has a computerized Ayn Rand as one of its characters.
Published 1998

Flying shark!
Many thanks to Corwin.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.92 out of 10)
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Jun 30

I find this frightening....Click for full image

Dahne Comments: I haven’t read the title story, so it is possible that before writing epic deconstructions of swords-and-knights fantasy, George R.R. Martin wrote about flying swarms of disembodied sexy lips invading from across the ocean. You really can’t pigeonhole the guy.
Published 1976

Uh….uhhh….
Marvelous! Thanks to Dahne.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.90 out of 10)
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Jun 28

In space no one can hear you varrrrooooooom!Click for full image

Rod Comments: Monochromatic red? Hardly kaleidoscopic when describing this gang unidentifiable flying bike objects.
Published 1979

Who wouldn’t want a space bike?
Many thanks to Rod!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.70 out of 10)
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