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Jun 05

Death by lens flare!Click for full image

DPN Comments: There is someting about this cover that just isn’t working.
Published 2006

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.96 out of 10)
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May 12

So... It's not a dog... I admit that... and I have pretty much conjured a sin against nature. But come on, how can you refuse that face!?Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Now this here is a real fine used dragon, ma’am. The previous owner was a little old lady who only drove it on Sundays.
Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.19 out of 10)
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Sep 02

It's dangerous to go alone... take this TING! with you!Click for full image

Andrew T Comments: Darth Vader, before he had the Death Star, trained crows each winter.
Published 1978

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.19 out of 10)
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Aug 15

*sigh* Training for decades... just to relieve headaches!Click for full image

Tom Noir Comments: Joey’s mom shows up unexpectedly at his bachelor pad.
Published 1994

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.24 out of 10)
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Aug 01

Jesters are cool... in my kingdom... everyone will dress as jesters!Click for full image

Miranda Comments: Disproportionate armed wizard holds some kind of jester-headed marital aid. Cover reads, “it could save the kingdom, and entertain at parties!”.
Published 1989

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.23 out of 10)
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Oct 30

Men... always fighting with their snakes... HEYOOOOOOO!Click for full image

Frank Comments: What’s with the nipple jewelry on the lady’s leather armor?
Published 1982

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.43 out of 10)
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Oct 17

For anyone wondering how CD's work... it works this way... every time you use a CD!Click for full image

Jaouad’s Art Direction: This author sells multi-millions, so I was thinking huge laserdisc with some vaguely operatic characters on it, flying across a landscape of red crystals with a ridiculously large moon in the background. Also a beach girl.
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.41 out of 10)
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Jun 01

Another bank holiday approaches for those in the UK! And also something about celebrating some sort of zombie vampire’s diamond jubilee… so I hear. So we might be taking a break until Wednesday while we sharpen our stakes and resurrect Peter Cushing to stop the foul beast!

So for our honourable mentions we have a collection of books about J. R. R. Tolkien and one about C. S. Lewis. These are simply fantastic and have all been sent in by Missie Kay so a big thanks to her!

Enjoy the covers and if you are benefiting from a long weekend, like me, I hope you enjoy it!

This is why they banned smoking in Bars & Pubs!Click for full image

Missie Comments: That’s not what “high fantasy” means, guys.

Just wait till you see where I keep Boromir!Click for slightly large image

Missie Comments: Not a very clear photo, sorry, but Gandalf and Gollum are on his shoulder, and there’s hobbit in his vest pocket.

Well I broke my back to sit here... I am going to finish this story!Click for full image

Missie Comments: Just hangin’ with some orcs.

Oh please... talk to the hand Troll... Talk to the hand!Click for full image

Missie Comments: Gollum clearly finds J.R.R. more frightening than the giant cave troll staring at him. (back cover of the previous book)

I believe Lewis should step in for Space Sheep at some stage!!!Click for full image

Missie Comments: Bonus cover! C.S. Lewis looks a bit shocked that there’s a naked lady behind him.

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.67 out of 10)
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May 18

Look dude... this... in no way... is a good replacement horn!Click for full image

Scott B Comments: Only the most evil of wizards would tease his familiar by tying its food to its face, juuuust out of reach.
Published 1977

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.24 out of 10)
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Feb 08

I look suspiciously like the wizard from two days ago...Click for full TOP-SHELF image

Claire’s Art Direction: Hum, riders on the wind. Well obviously lots of wind in a pretty colour, and a rider – I know, a naked chick with body tats. Throw in some standard fantasy stuff, like a castle and a wizard dude et voila!
Published 1988

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 4.76 out of 10)
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