Nov 03
Click for full imageAlice Comments: Know what else Tolkien readers are fans of? Little naked elf girls.
Published 1971
You might remember this from here.
(Average: 3.73 out of 10)
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Alice Comments: Know what else Tolkien readers are fans of? Little naked elf girls.
Published 1971
You might remember this from here.
(Average: 3.73 out of 10)Loading...
(9.25 out of 10) (9.18 out of 10) (9.01 out of 10) (8.97 out of 10) (8.93 out of 10) (8.93 out of 10) (8.93 out of 10) (8.92 out of 10) (8.88 out of 10) (8.88 out of 10)
Lastest Tweet
November 3rd, 2016 at 12:26 pm
It’s the novel that Tolkien fans really wanted, with naked elves, buff warriors, and acid trips!
*deep sexy voice* Helloooo Galadriel
November 3rd, 2016 at 1:10 pm
And it’s got 100% more crabs than Tolkien had.
November 3rd, 2016 at 2:04 pm
She has a ponytail where the ponies have them.
November 3rd, 2016 at 2:19 pm
Yes, that whole thing is her head.
November 3rd, 2016 at 2:36 pm
And it’s got 100% more warriors riding crabs than Tolkien had.
Why didn’t the dots over the ‘ i ‘ s get the curlicue treatment.
November 3rd, 2016 at 2:37 pm
So, is that like the Sword & Sorcery version of the Japanese horror classic THE RING…?
“What sort of strange book is that, Gundolf?”
“Foolish hobbit! Do not open the Tritonian Book! Do not read it! If you do, the curse of the book will strike you dead within three days… unless you pass on the book to another person and make her read it.”
November 3rd, 2016 at 2:40 pm
“For the fans of Tolkien’s ‘Lord of the Rings'”…
…because nothing says “Sword and Sorcery” like embarrassing butt hair.
November 3rd, 2016 at 3:27 pm
She’s hanging out naked in the woods – she’s probably a dryad, not an elf. I mean, I know elves like nature, but I’ve never heard of them being nudists.
November 3rd, 2016 at 3:38 pm
Half man all crab!!!
November 3rd, 2016 at 5:56 pm
She’s going to sue the media http://www.bbc.com/news/blogs-trending-37838197
November 3rd, 2016 at 6:35 pm
I guess, what I want to know is, are those her eggs surrounding her on strands? Or whose?
November 3rd, 2016 at 6:53 pm
Oh, there are so many things one wants to know. Like, who taught the artist how to use foreshortening (check out her teeny little right arm)? Why is there an extra space before the closing quotation marks after “Lord of the Rings”? Why is he wearing such a funny hat? And, given the derivation of “Tritonian” (Triton→Trident→Three teeth) + “Ring” does this mean we have a three-ring circus?
November 3rd, 2016 at 8:14 pm
And she was drifting through the cover
And she was taking off her dress
And she was moving very slowly
Cross-legged on her arse
Moving into the fields of kelp, and she’s
Drifting this way and that
Not touching the crab at all, and she’s
Down below the blurb…
November 3rd, 2016 at 8:20 pm
Could this hairy elf be the grandmother of the furry
cultphenomenon?November 4th, 2016 at 1:50 am
Hello, Tony? Got a book here that I suggested I ring you. What about? Um, naked little girls with tails and crabs. Tony? You still there? Tone! TONY?! Please yourself.
November 4th, 2016 at 12:55 pm
@JuanPaul. If so, any chance we can travel back in time and slay her?
November 4th, 2016 at 5:45 pm
@Rachel: but what if she were also the grandmother of the vore phenomenon?
November 5th, 2016 at 1:10 am
Watch out, crab rider, she’s ripped out the vertebrae of better men than you.