Sep 11

Mars has two moons. Checks out.Click for larger image

Surface of Venus is super hot. Checks out.Click for larger image

It’s a Two-fer Tuesday: NEL – ERB – WTF!

Good Show Sir Comments: Synthetic Men Are from Mars, Synthetic Boobs Are from Venus

Published 1972

Thanks to Lulu for sending one in!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 3.00 out of 10)

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20 Responses to “Synthetic Men of Mars & Escape on Venus”

  1. THX 1139 Says:

    1: Don’t think much of the new Wonder Woman costume.

    2: That year’s frisbee championships were sparsely attended.

  2. Bibliomancer Says:

    1. Not a man

    2. Not an escape

  3. fred Says:

    1. With no title I would swear this is a Gor book.

    2. I thought Adrienne Barbeau died in Escape from New York.

  4. B. Chiclitz Says:

    1. “Hmmmm, my boob seems to be shrinking. I think this arm cuff is cutting off my circulation.”

    2. It’s amazing what you can do with a large fondue fork.

  5. Francis Boyle Says:


    1. You don’t know how they identify.

    2. Escape by bondage balloon is a thing, and if it isn’t, I’ve just invented a new fetish.

  6. Tat Wood Says:

    I read the first one in 1980. My main memory is that there’s a chapter called ‘The Mighty Jed of Goolie’. In a town full of expat Scots a ‘Jed’ is a tramp.

  7. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Tat W—Judging from that cover, are you sure it’s not “The Mighty Goolie of Jed”? 😉

  8. Tat Wood Says:

    @B. Chiclitz: just the one? Does he lean to one side as a result?

  9. Longtime_Lurker Says:

    BC, Tat: Tat’s right. No goolies on the lady. Both books are now out of copyright in Australia and are available on Gutenberg Australia. And if you think no. 1 is GSS-worthy, have a gander at the original Argosy cover:

  10. Raoul Says:

    “bondage • cleavage • damsel • devil’s dumplings • hunkbutt • nip slip • pole weapon • side boob • Sir Mix-A-Lot • starkers • teat shields” …
    … it’s like Tag Wizard’s birthday!

  11. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Tat W—What we have here is another rich instance of two people being divided by a common language. I wasn’t sure what a “goolie” was (though I now know); I was riffing off the word “coolie” which, according to, is “used as short for a slang Spanish and Italian term, “culo”, spelled “coolie” referring to the buttocks.” I learned that word as a kid and it always makes me giggle.

    If I had known what you meant by “goolie” (singular) the first time, I’d have responded with a reference to this guy.

  12. Tat Wood Says:

    @B.Chiclitz: now you see why ‘The Groovy Ghoulies’ never really caught on in Britain.

    And I’d never wear a glow-in-the-dark T-shirt like his

  13. Bibliomancer Says:

    @TW, BC – Actually, these covers remind me more of La Goulue.

  14. Tag Wizard Says:

    @Raoul – It was hard work. I had to take a shower afterwards.

  15. GSS ex-noob Says:

    I’m afraid that #1 might actually be a good illustration of the contents, judging by the items it has in common with the original Argosy cover! Although I think the lasses of Barsoom had bazooms larger than Ms. Sideboob here (why, since they lay eggs, I dunno, but they did. Related to platypi?)

    @BC: I knew what “goolie” meant in British, but I’d have thought your “coolie” comparison to apply to the synthetic men in a different way, as synthetic men could take the place of unskilled labor without all those pesky human rights issues.

  16. JuanPaul Says:

    1. That little towel over her butt must also serve as a polishing cloth.

    2. Isn’t it annoying when your hands are tied up and you get an itch on your leg?

  17. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Bibliomancer—What a sad story! I found it captivating, and learned something about fin de siècle Paris—like Montemarte really used to have a lot of working windmills before they became dance halls.

  18. Bibliomancer Says:

    @B. Chiclitz – I actually first heard about her from a throw-away line in a Roxy Music song: “Do the Strand”.

  19. A.R.Yngve Says:


  20. GSS ex-noob Says:

    And melons?

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