preload
Feb 24

It's not his child. Yolks on him.Click for larger image

Ryan Comments: So fabulous!

Published 1985

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.75 out of 10)
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22 Responses to “The Eggchild”

  1. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Sitting that close to those huge flapping wings, that baby is going to get pneumonia for sure…

    …if the wings don’t fling it off the flying horse first!

  2. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Sequels were:
    THE SUNNY SIDE UP KID
    THE SCRAMBLED EGGS BOY
    THE OMELETTE YOUTH
    THE POACHED EGGS MAN

  3. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @A.R. Yngve: the blurb writer seems to be playing it coy on the gender identity of the eggchild, so we’re not sure if it’s going to be an Eggman [1] or Eggwoman. (Calling the child “it” does seem a bit rude, unless the Eggchild has already decided on a nonbinary gender identity or is like a snail or something. )

    [1] Presumably not the one that fights Sonic.

  4. Bruce A Munro Says:

    The horse really missed out on her morning coffee: she seems to have put on the outer row of feathers backwards.

  5. THX 1139 Says:

    “You’ve made me eat my unborn children!!!”

    Big question here is: how does he stay on?

  6. Francis Boyle Says:

    Sword-wielding guy there looks like a South Park celebrity guest.

  7. JuanPaul Says:

    That guy isn’t stopping anybody in those open toe boots. Maybe he should drive that horse by the mall and get a pedicure first.

    Speaking of the horse, is it wearing black latex leggings?

  8. Bibliomancer Says:

    Young King Egbert, of the McMuffin clan.

  9. Adzel Says:

    If ever you needed a babysitter during your 1980’s weekend-getaway-Arizona-vacation-peyote-dream-quest, Kirk Douglas was always the guy to call.

  10. Ryan Says:

    The horse’s ears are laid back, and I can see the whites of her eyes. She is either terrified of the strangely-short sword, or else annoyed by the screams of the Eggchild.

  11. fred Says:

    Scoff all you want, but Donald Trump has some mad diaper changing skills. This situation? A minute or less.

  12. Tat Wood Says:

    Do the Charles Vess illustrations include semolina pilchards climbing up the Eiffel Tower?

  13. Raoul Says:

    @Tat – Goo Goo G’joob!

  14. Paul Says:

    Eggstraordinary.

    Sorry. I’ll get my coat.

  15. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Oh no! Paul just opened Pandora’s Box of Puns…

    This thread is going to be scrambled eggsactly from this point.

  16. JuanPaul Says:

    @Paul&AR omelet you get away with the puns this time.

  17. B. Chiclitz Says:

    I’m ashirredly not getting involved in this eggschange.

  18. Tor Mented Says:

    You people crack me up.

  19. GSS ex-noob Says:

    That all looks very unsafe. The Eggchild is going to fall off, the dude can’t possibly hold him/her/it/them as the horse is flapping around. And dude has a very insecure seat, between having no saddle or reins (and both hands full), and the chafing on his thighs is going to be terrible. Add in that the pegasus! is unhappy, as @Ryan said, and it’s all bad.

    One more stroke of those oddly-feathered wings, and baby for sure and dude most likely are going to be splats in Monument Valley.

    For once, a cover dude has almost the same outfit as a cover damsel. Impractical open boots, not enough leg or arm covering, probably no scabbard.

    I think the title was written with egg yolk.

    Why a different artist for cover and interior illustrations? I bet the interior ones are better.

    @Adzel: GSS. Kirk Douglas could manage to make that outfit look less silly.

    @Tat: do what now?

    @the punsters: I got nothing, but GSS.

  20. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @all: Your puns are eggscruciating. They’ve left me a shell of my former self.

    Why “evil child” tag? We know the enchanter wants the baby, but that doesn’t make Eggbow Brite evil itself.

    Thought; maybe the guy on the horse isn’t a good guy, but the enchanter. He’s magically protected from falling off or chafing, although not from looking silly.

  21. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Bruce: I was just thinking that magic is literally the only way this transportation is going to work. That or a whole lot of glue.

    I believe all kids are de facto defined as “evil children” here. The baby is at least weird and uncanny.

  22. A.R.Yngve Says:

    With an expectant smile, Vladimir Putin showed the party committée his design for a re-election campaign poster.
    A mortified silence followed, as no one dared to voice his reaction…

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