Apr 05
Click for larger imageGood Show Sir Comments: The fonts! They burn!
Thanks to Ryan for sending this in!
Published 1992
(Average: 4.55 out of 10)
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Good Show Sir Comments: The fonts! They burn!
Thanks to Ryan for sending this in!
Published 1992
(Average: 4.55 out of 10)Loading...
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April 5th, 2022 at 10:03 am
From Roger E. Moore, this should really be called The Maelstrom’s Eyebrow.
April 5th, 2022 at 11:23 am
Putin unleashes the iron dirigable submarines. I quite like the sparky ting. Perspective problem with the conning tower.
April 5th, 2022 at 12:10 pm
Is a Cloakmaster such a proud boast? Is there a Cagoule Master? A Cardigan Master?
April 5th, 2022 at 1:23 pm
@fred: I don’t know if it’s perspective problems or a TARDIS.
April 5th, 2022 at 1:48 pm
One hand for your sword one for for the sub!
April 5th, 2022 at 2:20 pm
Kirk Douglas successfully convinces Stanley Kubrick and Walt Disney to merge their two film projects into the soon-to-be-classic MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Slaves Under the Sea.*
It will require a reshoot of, amongst other scenes, Douglas singing this song, wearing his gladiator togs.
* Yes, should be XX with bars above, but I can’t be arsed to figure out the HTML to do it.
April 5th, 2022 at 5:32 pm
Sony get their hands on the rights to Fortycoats.*
Is a spelljammer when predictive text is stuck on ‘English (US)’ rather than the real thing?
(* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fortycoats_%26_Co.)
April 5th, 2022 at 6:01 pm
Quite impressive how Rainbow Lady can impale that beast and, despite her daring decolletage, not suffer a nip slip.
April 5th, 2022 at 6:10 pm
OK, so a gypsy and a ren fair reject fighting S&M Orcs atop Captain Nemo’s submarine…or is it an improbably armored dirigible? Kind of a “let’s throw stuff at the wall and see what sticks” cover.
I guess the dude is the Cloakmaster, since he seems to have a universe in his cape, er, cloak. [1] I wonder if that leads to trouble if he sits down incautiously. (OTOH, it makes cleanup a snap, whether after yardwork or a battle: just toss your waste into outer space!)
[1] Is that a galaxy in your pants, or are you just glad to see me?
April 5th, 2022 at 11:48 pm
Oh hey, there are 6 books in this series, each cover crazier than the previous. Put yer thrifting hats on and meet me back here in a coupla months?
https://www.worthpoint.com/worthopedia/d-spell-jammer-cloakmaster-cycle-set-1826052531
April 6th, 2022 at 12:18 am
Is the book as much of a mess as this cover?
So there’s a submarine-ish thing atop which a guy — possibly Kirk Douglas, per @Nomad’s excellent suggestion — clad in Ye Olde Ren Faire costume made of Ye Olde Spandex, and a woman in a late 19th/early 20th century theatrical “gypsy” costume suitable for being a can-can girl…
(deep breath)
are both fighting orc-things who have battle axes and stupidly pointy armor.
Do I have that right?
There seems to be a comfy chair in the conning tower, I guess it’s Kirk’s but maybe the girl gets to use it once in a while.
As regards the title, are they in the eye of the maelstrom, or is the bright light the eye?
@Bruce: Don’t know if that’s a galaxy, or if his cape is reversible and has blue on one side, sequins on black on the other.
@Emster: Good find. While the covers are uniformly eye-gouging, changing the layout and colors partway through seems an odd choice for Generic Extruded Fantasy Product.
@Tat: Nah, it’s like a phone jammer. No one can use spells around him, it’s all pointy things and cloak mastery.
Although since the wind seems to be coming from 3 different directions, maybe the cloak IS the master and has a mind of its own (like Dr. Strange’s) and Kirk and the girl are just its henchpersons.
April 6th, 2022 at 3:02 am
@GSS ex-noob: in Sorcerous Union, cloak wear you!
April 6th, 2022 at 3:23 am
It could be worse: if this were the cover of the typical Baen edition Harry Turtledove book, the vessel would be a nuclear-powered USS Monitor, Kirk Douglas would be Abe Lincoln in Kevlar body armour and the orcs would have jet packs.
April 6th, 2022 at 7:24 am
TBH, orcs in jet packs would be a definite improvement.
April 7th, 2022 at 2:27 am
@JJYoyo: the damsel, however, would still be scantily clad. Also there would be so many guns.
April 7th, 2022 at 3:17 am
Emperor Davros called, he expects that Dalek to quit partying on the main deck and get back to taking over the universe.
April 7th, 2022 at 3:49 am
@GSSxN: looking at the show girl made me rethink the whole scene, somehow. It might not be 20k leagues under the sea. It might be an episode of The Wild Wild West – Night of the Juggernaut… only Artemus Gordon has really outdone himself on his disguise this time. Maybe it’s been Artemis Gordon all this time, and the show was even less wholesome than we thought.
April 7th, 2022 at 3:59 am
That green room in the tower looks like an absurdly small tiled bathroom with an elaborate toilet and lamp for reading while doing one’s business.
April 8th, 2022 at 2:47 am
@JJYoyo: I don’t think Artie had gams like that; even the master of disguise he was couldn’t pull that off. Could easily be Jim in the cloak, though, and it does look steampunky. Maybe Jim and the girl of the week are fighting the orcs — which are really guys in costume; the sub probably is Dr. Loveless’. Perhaps Artie’s below and left the conning tower door open.
(BTW, have a couple friends who worked with Ross Martin once. Just as nice, charming, and awesome as you’d hope.)
@Tracy: So, a deluxe portapotty? If the sub does belong to Loveless, he’d fit in it better. I think we have it figured out!
April 8th, 2022 at 3:33 am
@GSSxN: I am really happy to hear that Ross Martin was a class act IRL. You’ve made my day.
April 9th, 2022 at 1:51 am
@JJYoyo: Funny and thoughtful. It was a stage play, and he learned the names of everyone in the cast, crew, and even the ushers and thanked them all individually. My friend still gets dreamy-eyed.