Rather than have one straightforward campaign using one idea, US advertisers run six or seven at once for the same thing. Geico, yet another even-cheaper-car-insurance one, muddles its message with this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdAqnocf81Q (A neanderthal trying to insure his car, or do other supposedly-amusing everyday activities) and this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuTpvCjg-fw(a CGI reptile with the voice of Max Branning, because nothing says ‘trustworthy source for car advice’ like a philandering used-car dealer and murderer).
The wraparound back cover probably shows the couple who’ve bought a new house with obscure 80s band Ratt living in the basement. And a woodchuck. And a camel.
Once I realized that the brown thing at the top was a dragon’s head and not a distant rock formation, then I wondered where exactly the caveman was exiting.
The lost Fifth Gospel of Melvin had so much cool stuff in it, especially about the dragons and amazons of the Resurrected Christ. Pity it was edited out by the early Church…
So much bad with this I’ve given one of my rare 10 ratings. What kills me is the lady’s denim jumpsuit with the bell bottoms and the artist’s complete lack of skill with texturing rock and scales, not to mention the lack of perspective depicting the serpentine mounds in the distance. The caveman looks like he is quietly trying to escape all this in an artistic photobomb moment.
At last, a book for which the SFBC cover wasn’t the worst. The guy on that one has clothes and the dragon-thingy is more impressive.
I thought I remembered Phantasia Press as appearing here regularly, and indeed it has. Consistent badness.
The French and German covers are, as usual, bad.
@Tat: The wrap-around cover has the rest of the dragon, the rest of the cave Mr. Starkers is exiting, and more dragons. It’s actually better than the front.
@Tracy: You can tell this is a primitive planet by the fact that denim bell-bottom jumpsuits were out of fashion by 1983.
@ Hammy: maybe the title isn’t investment advice, which they had better not be making without a Series 7 and 63 registration anyway. Maybe it’s a real estate pitch: $40 000 in Gehenna; $10.7 million in Sagaponack.
I think I see why that guy’s stuck in the cave. Look how awkward and possibly useless his attempt to climb out is. Wouldn’t you want both arms with hands supporting your weight, not one just touching, the other off to the side doing nothing, and only one leg up? If he brings the other leg up, he’s going to collapse back down on his starkers butt.
No wonder Denim Woman’s ignoring him.
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July 21st, 2022 at 3:00 pm
Rather than have one straightforward campaign using one idea, US advertisers run six or seven at once for the same thing. Geico, yet another even-cheaper-car-insurance one, muddles its message with this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdAqnocf81Q (A neanderthal trying to insure his car, or do other supposedly-amusing everyday activities) and this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuTpvCjg-fw(a CGI reptile with the voice of Max Branning, because nothing says ‘trustworthy source for car advice’ like a philandering used-car dealer and murderer).
The wraparound back cover probably shows the couple who’ve bought a new house with obscure 80s band Ratt living in the basement. And a woodchuck. And a camel.
July 21st, 2022 at 4:47 pm
You had forty thousand
When you were in Gehenna.
But I was in the valley
And I didn’t have enna.
July 21st, 2022 at 4:49 pm
Unfrozen caveman climate denier.
July 21st, 2022 at 4:53 pm
I’m glad naked rock climbing never became a thing.
July 21st, 2022 at 5:25 pm
Once I realized that the brown thing at the top was a dragon’s head and not a distant rock formation, then I wondered where exactly the caveman was exiting.
July 21st, 2022 at 6:09 pm
The lost Fifth Gospel of Melvin had so much cool stuff in it, especially about the dragons and amazons of the Resurrected Christ. Pity it was edited out by the early Church…
July 21st, 2022 at 6:41 pm
So much bad with this I’ve given one of my rare 10 ratings. What kills me is the lady’s denim jumpsuit with the bell bottoms and the artist’s complete lack of skill with texturing rock and scales, not to mention the lack of perspective depicting the serpentine mounds in the distance. The caveman looks like he is quietly trying to escape all this in an artistic photobomb moment.
July 21st, 2022 at 7:08 pm
“See? I told you 1983 would be a lot more fun than that Hawkwind concert you were complaining about.”
July 21st, 2022 at 9:41 pm
At last, a book for which the SFBC cover wasn’t the worst. The guy on that one has clothes and the dragon-thingy is more impressive.
I thought I remembered Phantasia Press as appearing here regularly, and indeed it has. Consistent badness.
The French and German covers are, as usual, bad.
@Tat: The wrap-around cover has the rest of the dragon, the rest of the cave Mr. Starkers is exiting, and more dragons. It’s actually better than the front.
@Tracy: You can tell this is a primitive planet by the fact that denim bell-bottom jumpsuits were out of fashion by 1983.
July 21st, 2022 at 11:05 pm
Aliens make crop circles, dragons make pasture swirls. Just don’t ask what they are made of. And maybe stand upwind.
July 21st, 2022 at 11:56 pm
@Emster: I can’t unsee that now. GSS!
July 23rd, 2022 at 4:48 am
Forty thousand in Gehenna isn’t much of a retirement fund….
July 23rd, 2022 at 4:33 pm
If that is Jamie Lee Curtis this should be an interesting addition to Halloween canon.
July 23rd, 2022 at 9:49 pm
@fred: Jamie Lee is gonna take her dragon and kill that bastard once and for all. Then he can become what @Emster suggested.
July 24th, 2022 at 2:50 am
@Hammy: you’ll end up naked and living in a cave.
July 24th, 2022 at 4:51 pm
@ Hammy: maybe the title isn’t investment advice, which they had better not be making without a Series 7 and 63 registration anyway. Maybe it’s a real estate pitch: $40 000 in Gehenna; $10.7 million in Sagaponack.
July 26th, 2022 at 2:25 am
@JJYoyo (prev.): Is that what they mean by “location, location, location”?
July 26th, 2022 at 9:47 pm
@JJoyo, @Hammy: the “pasture swirls” will certainly have an effect on real estate prices.
July 27th, 2022 at 12:00 am
I think I see why that guy’s stuck in the cave. Look how awkward and possibly useless his attempt to climb out is. Wouldn’t you want both arms with hands supporting your weight, not one just touching, the other off to the side doing nothing, and only one leg up? If he brings the other leg up, he’s going to collapse back down on his starkers butt.
No wonder Denim Woman’s ignoring him.