I like the television nature show presenter sneaking off the cover on the right after deciding that he doesn’t even want to do a voice over for a programme about giant War Frogs..
‘The nearest I’ve seen to a genuine rival [to Terry Pratchett [‘s binman [‘s daughter’s GCSE English final]]].’
— Sarah Broadhurst, THE BOOKSELLER [didn’t write this]
The very popular Hounds of Love were requested for the annual environmental cleanup. Unfortunately, the agent mistakenly heard “Hounds of Hell” who were unavailable, so he sent the Frogs of War and threw in a Battle Snake for good measure…
“But the painting cover is so gloriously bad I decided to front the post with it. Bad in a ‘lady goes into a wallpaper shop to find behind the counter not, as she expected, a wallpaper shop assistant, but instead a man dressed as a Spanish conquistador manipulating a life-size ventriloquist dummy whilst a larger feller with three spears sticking out of his arse stands to one side watching’ sort of way.”
I knew this one would be appreciated. It tried to hop off the shelf at me but I held it at bay with my trusty phone camera.
@Ryan can attest, the “good” stuff is at HPB. I too liked how they put the sticker over the the boring sunlight so we could see all the true horror, plus the title LOL. The employees have to look at this stuff every day (plus all the horrid covers in every other genre) so I think they deserve a bit of fun and amusing sticker placement.
This book cover has everything:Giant slavering toothed frogs, confused people in a pile of boxes, someone in black getting the hell outta Dodge, and a dragon lurking in the background.
@NomadUK: I wonder if Sarah Broadhurst has regretted this blurb. I kind of hope so.
@BC: GSS!
@Bruce: Yes, Adam was a regular here, but before either of our times. And he summed that image up perfectly.
I am returning to HPB soon to sell more books (none with covers bad enough for here) so perhaps I will come across something else worthy of GSS.
March 15th, 2023 at 11:44 am
I have to say it, I don’t give two frogs for this cover.
March 15th, 2023 at 12:04 pm
If it was Pratchett it would be Firkin Mirkin & Co..
March 15th, 2023 at 12:07 pm
Moses is back…
in black…
and he’s PISSED.
“This is what the plague of frogs should’ve been!”
March 15th, 2023 at 12:17 pm
Anyone feel like crying havoc?
I kind of feel like crying, at least.
March 15th, 2023 at 12:55 pm
I like the television nature show presenter sneaking off the cover on the right after deciding that he doesn’t even want to do a voice over for a programme about giant War Frogs..
March 15th, 2023 at 1:50 pm
Ferkin Hell.
This looks about as much fun as a ‘Fun Pub’.
March 15th, 2023 at 2:00 pm
‘The nearest I’ve seen to a genuine rival [to Terry Pratchett [‘s binman [‘s daughter’s GCSE English final]]].’
— Sarah Broadhurst, THE BOOKSELLER [didn’t write this]
March 15th, 2023 at 3:17 pm
When unboxing videos in fairyland go bad.
or,
The cyborg ninja’s greatest rival: the pirate witch.
“Terry Pratchett’s greatest rival who nobody’s heard of!”
(To be fair, the name seems vaguely familiar).
March 15th, 2023 at 3:29 pm
The very popular Hounds of Love were requested for the annual environmental cleanup. Unfortunately, the agent mistakenly heard “Hounds of Hell” who were unavailable, so he sent the Frogs of War and threw in a Battle Snake for good measure…
March 15th, 2023 at 4:00 pm
There’s a reason why we’ve all hard of this https://dark-mountain.net/with-with-the-newts/ and this https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Fog_of_War but not today’s offering.
March 15th, 2023 at 4:02 pm
@Emster: are you proposing a Paul McCartney/ Kate Bush team-up? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gVfaf43W9cM
“It’s in the Swamp! It’s coming!”
March 15th, 2023 at 4:08 pm
You can’t tell me the employee at HPB who put this price tag on the book didn’t know exactly what he or she was doing.
March 15th, 2023 at 4:59 pm
Portland Mayor finds a way to remove the homeless camp from Peninsula Crossing.
March 15th, 2023 at 5:37 pm
@Tat – I b’lieve that’s the first time I’ve heard/seen that particular song/vid from Sir Paul, so that was good fun.
March 15th, 2023 at 6:15 pm
The Frog of War—isn’t that what Robert McNamara blamed all of his disastrous Vietnam decisions on?
“Secret bombing of Cambodia? Agent Orange? Blame that goddamn frog, not me!”
March 15th, 2023 at 6:51 pm
Day of Judgement God is calling
On their knees the war frogs crawling…
March 15th, 2023 at 9:36 pm
In the nitty, gritty retro-future of the Frogger reboot, there is only war – but at least no more cars, or roads…
March 15th, 2023 at 10:17 pm
It could also be The Fart of War lol
March 15th, 2023 at 11:11 pm
Off topic but didn’t Adam Roberts use to occasionally post here? His description of this http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_2brR4nApx7A/TBqPTqMruAI/AAAAAAAAAxA/Glw4-k_vVUw/s1600/Jordan%2BKnife.jpg
Wheel of Time cover seems rather GSS-ish:
“But the painting cover is so gloriously bad I decided to front the post with it. Bad in a ‘lady goes into a wallpaper shop to find behind the counter not, as she expected, a wallpaper shop assistant, but instead a man dressed as a Spanish conquistador manipulating a life-size ventriloquist dummy whilst a larger feller with three spears sticking out of his arse stands to one side watching’ sort of way.”
March 15th, 2023 at 11:27 pm
Three down, one to go….
March 16th, 2023 at 4:44 am
I knew this one would be appreciated. It tried to hop off the shelf at me but I held it at bay with my trusty phone camera.
@Ryan can attest, the “good” stuff is at HPB. I too liked how they put the sticker over the the boring sunlight so we could see all the true horror, plus the title LOL. The employees have to look at this stuff every day (plus all the horrid covers in every other genre) so I think they deserve a bit of fun and amusing sticker placement.
This book cover has everything:Giant slavering toothed frogs, confused people in a pile of boxes, someone in black getting the hell outta Dodge, and a dragon lurking in the background.
@NomadUK: I wonder if Sarah Broadhurst has regretted this blurb. I kind of hope so.
@BC: GSS!
@Bruce: Yes, Adam was a regular here, but before either of our times. And he summed that image up perfectly.
I am returning to HPB soon to sell more books (none with covers bad enough for here) so perhaps I will come across something else worthy of GSS.
April 11th, 2023 at 11:22 am
OK, but if Terry Pratchett is explicitly outside the scope of the rules as parody, why are we allowing Andrew Harman?
I do have this as well as a few others in the series (The Sorceror’s Appendix, The Tome Tunnel, The Scrying Game).
April 12th, 2023 at 1:32 am
Silly newbie.
Rules don’t apply to me!