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Nov 27

Starfire Down

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Smirky McSmug is my co-pilot

Good Show Sir Comments: STAAAAE DDUUN

Thanks to Ryan for sending this in!

Published 1991

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.50 out of 10)
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9 Responses to “Starfire Down”

  1. Tat Wood Says:
    November 27th, 2023 at 11:26 am

    Dave Bartram from Showaddywaddy refuses to listen to the small astronaut who suggests that at least one of the people at the controls looks where they’re going.

    (Where ARE they going? The toroidal lay-out and circular windscreen only works if they are all travelling in the direction we would call ‘up’ but there’s a ceiling full of controls.)

  2. fred Says:
    November 27th, 2023 at 1:55 pm

    This brings up the classic conundrum of which came first – The cover art or the position of the cover blurb.

  3. GSS ex-noob Says:
    November 27th, 2023 at 10:54 pm

    This assaulted my eyeballs when the first word showed up… and then it got progressively worse.

    @Ryan: Your title interpretation is perfect. It was a good rendering of the noise I made looking at the cover. We would also have accepted STAAAAE OOLUN.

    Also, who gives a prime character the name “Cge”? How’s that said? Cage? Something excessively Balkan?

    Presuming “Conek and Cge” are Smirky and Large Bot, then who the heck are Small Robot (Cge Jr.?), the man and woman in jumpsuits, and the two green aliens?

    @fred: I also am not fond of how the blurb doesn’t quite fit the space allotted. Particularly the final “die!” which ought to be more visible.

    @Tat: Perhaps Small Bot is telling Smirky to stop spinning the ship while they progress in whatever direction they’re going?

    One of the brothers Warhola was way more successful than the other…

  4. Francis Boyle Says:
    November 27th, 2023 at 11:23 pm

    Girls don’t need seats, amirite?

  5. Bruce A Munro Says:
    November 28th, 2023 at 12:10 am

    Smirky Guy (to be played by 2000 AD Brendan Fraser perhaps?): you’re just being paranoid.

    Small robot: paranoid? Well answer me this, wise guy: where are the doors to this place? How the hell did we get in here in the first place?

    @Tat Wood: it’s all entirely automated, they’re mostly just playing video games or scrolling through Space Social Media.

    @GSS ex-noob: perhaps Conek and Cge are _both_ robots, once again having to deal with annoying, smirky organics.

    Uninspired lumpy green aliens. “I don’t know what controls for a spaceship look like so I’ll just put in a bunch of colored squares” controls. And overly crowded outer space, unless that image is just something created by the ship’s computer to keep the redundant crew amused.

    Is the small dragon-thing on the bottom left a ship’s mascot or a space-bobblehead?

  6. Emster Says:
    November 28th, 2023 at 1:04 am

    If Bk8hd did not quit pestering the other Space Campers and return to his seat, he’d be thrown out the airlock (embarrassing because this “bridge” is in a large studio set, and he’ll be expected to wait out in the hall until lunch break).

  7. Ryan Says:
    November 28th, 2023 at 3:22 am

    @GSS ex-noob: The title interpretation is entirely the makings of the Tag Wizard. I am not creative enough to come up with the funny stuff The Wizard adds to the byline.

    Smirky McSmug is definitely number one on my literal hit list if we get stranded in space. What a punchable fiz.

  8. B. Chiclitz Says:
    November 28th, 2023 at 4:29 am

    “You know, you two aren’t nearly as funny as Raket and Skibet.”

  9. GSS ex-noob Says:
    November 28th, 2023 at 10:40 pm

    @Bruce: I’m going with bobblehead. Seems like the kind of thing Smirky would like. Also, anything with functional wings would be on the other side of the bridge. Between dude and green alien #1 looks like a better place to perch. Unless tiny dragon is the actual boss.

    @BC: Truer words were never typed.

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