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May 28

Solid Rocket Broomsters

Good Show Sir Comments: The untold story behind the Challenger Disaster

Thanks to Ryan for sending this in!

Published 1984

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 5.11 out of 10)
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21 Responses to “The First Astrowitches”

  1. Bruce A Munro Says:

    Kiki’s planet express delivery service.

  2. fred Says:

    ‘…and when I grow up I’m going to be the bestest astrowitch that ever astrowitched.’

    https://leagueofcomicgeeks.com/comic/9479022/astrowitch-1?variant=8762331

  3. Tor Mented Says:

    I hate it when my astrow itches.

  4. fred Says:

    The paperback cover gives us a little more info on the two.

    https://www.brotherhoodbooks.org.au/the-first-astrowitches-071001002508

  5. Emster Says:

    @Tor: GSS!

    Challenge to everyone else: name the cream that’ll fix it…

  6. Leak Says:

    Are we talking Astronowitches or Astrolowitches here? BIG difference!

    @Emster: Baen & Jerry’s?

  7. NomadUK Says:

    Emster@5: Astrowitch-hazel?

    (Trying for the obvious one, but neither Preparation Haitch nor Preparation Aitch seem quite right. Preparation Witch?)

  8. Bruce A Munro Says:

    GSS, @Tor Mented, @Good Show Sir Comments

    Good find, @fred

  9. B. Chiclitz Says:

    “C’mon Astrow, get a move on. we don’t want to be late for our hot date with Raket ad Skibet!”

    “Sorry Itch, I’m getting thigh-burn from this stupid broom.”

  10. B. Chiclitz Says:

    “Hurry up Astrow, we don’t want to be late for our hot date with Raket and Skibet!”

    “Sorry Itch, I’m getting thigh burn from this stupid broom.”

  11. fred Says:

    The Popeil sandpaper in a tube.

  12. GSS ex-noob Says:

    I first thought, “well, standard for a 50s-60s kids’ book… wait, that’s the 80s?”

    The paperback cover is actually better, more in tune with that time.

    I really think NASA would have noticed small children in and around their spacecraft — then again you’d think they’d have noticed that o-ring.

    GSS to all. Especially @Leak, @Bruce, and good callback from @BC.

  13. Ryan Says:

    I guess if Witchard and Witcheena are such slaves to fashion that they must sport that particular footwear, then they are going to need to ride broomsticks to get anywhere.

  14. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @Ryan: you’d think, but… https://medium.com/be-open/fads-from-the-past-ridiculously-pointy-shoes-in-medieval-europe-188733c0695 https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-57427365

  15. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Ryan: I too wondered about the shoes. It’s 1984 and they’re teens, why not magick up the first Air Jordans? Or at least the knock-offs.

    NASA clothes do not allow for such footwear. Or hats.

    @Bruce: Your second link shows the terrible bunions they got — and the damage on older people’s feet from wearing them in their youth. Just because it’s historical doesn’t mean it’s good for you.

    I suspect that kids in the 80s rolled eyes at their names. They make our jokes above look like the highest of highbrow humor. Makes them sound like they talk like Elmer Fudd. “Witchard! Be vewy vewy quiet…”

  16. Tat Wood Says:

    @Ryan: if they’re American witches, maybe 1984’s the year they caught up with European fashions from the early 60s. Or perhaps they were uncharacteristically on-trend and had met some Goths from Leeds.https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winklepicker https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/F_Club

    Then again, they’re in Florida, where people seriously thought Crockett and Tubbs were stylish.

  17. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Tat: Crockett and Tubbs were infinitely more stylish than everyone else in Florida at the time, believe me. Or even now. And they didn’t wear stupid shoes and hats.

    These poor children should not have to dress like an antiquated stereotype of their profession. Particularly if they’re interested in space travel. Even Floridians would look at them funny unless they were underage workers at Disney World. Then or especially now. You go swooping around in those clothes (or any other) at NASA’s launch pad, and I don’t know if any magic can fight off Feds with extremely automatic weapons. You ain’t getting on board, and even if you did, you better bring your own oxygen and anti-mass devices and… yeah, we’re back to Challenger.

    Were there ever any more of these books? Did the little bastards burn up too, I hope?

  18. JJYoyo Says:

    Leningrad Cowboys Go Trick-or-Treating in America.

    https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0097728/mediaviewer/rm3153441536/?ref_=tt_md_1

  19. Tracy Says:

    A cute cover… for 1974. It reminds me of the artist who worked on Charlotte’s Web.

  20. A. R. Yngve Says:

    I have so many questions…

    – Do Astrowitches need space suits?

    – How far into space can you get on a broomstick?

    – Would the presence of witches make NASA rethink its entire approach to space travel?

    – Did sales of this book suffer due to the Satanic Panic in the 80s?

    – And… WHAT IN THE EFFING EFF??

  21. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @ARY: Your last point sums it up.

    I still think they have a speech impediment and their names are Richard and Regina. Maybe they’re descended from Monty Python’s version of Pilate, or Elmer Fudd. I hope they never have to interact with regular humans.

    Still, you’d think either magic or a therapist could have fixed that.

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