Feb 17

Nice Beaver! Thanks I just had it stuffed!Click for full image

Tom Noir’s Art Direction: Stevens! We have a problem. ‘Demon Muskrat Vixens,’ just came back from the printers with a picture of some giant cube on the cover. What happened to that crazy ass piece we originally commissioned for it?!

Update: New, improved cover photo supplied by Tom Noir!

Published 1993

Many thanks to Tom!

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.81 out of 10)

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45 Responses to “In the Cube”

  1. Weirdmage Says:

    “A Novel of Future Boston”
    -Giant beavers (or whatever that is) with guns!
    I think I’ll drop Boston if I go to the US.

  2. Adam Roberts Says:

    ‘In future Boston, bras will be a thing of the past.’

    Am I the only one who reads that title as ‘Cin the Ube’?

  3. Ian Sales Says:

    Wasn’t that woman in some 1980s US television series?

  4. Phil Says:

    I see this one is tagged as (among other things) “front problems”. Is this a cleavage reference?

    This is another one for the “behind you!” panto category. Except that the perspective is all off, and the beaver is capable of being on her back AND to the left side of her head AND leaning on the Borg cube which otherwise appears to be half a mile away.

    I defy anyone to identify an exact line where her hair ends and the shoulder-mounted beaver begins.

  5. The Tag Wizard Says:

    Phil> You tag fascist! Ok, mistakes were made and have now been corrected thanks! ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. SI Says:

    No no the book is actually called, “In The OBE.” The right side of the O has just fallen in.

  7. THX 1138 Says:

    Is the beaver called Justin?

  8. Carolyn B Says:

    Oh, dear – am I the first one to make the Police Squad joke? “Nice beaver!”

  9. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    “My story? Well, I came here for the Boston Tree Party…”

  10. Tom Noir Says:

    That beaver has quite a highly developed sense of balance. It’s able to be behind her head even with a hind leg placed on both shoulders AND point a gun at someone.

    Anyways, apologies for the poor picture quality. Difficulties with my cellphone camera. I’ll do better next time.

    I now live very close to my town’s large used book store ‘Chamblins Book Mine’. I expect many good covers to come…

  11. dt Says:

    Wow, is In the Cube really almost 20 years old? A lot of good writers came out of that Boston writer’s project.

    Hey, that cube is like a mile on a side. And that’s just an ordinary Charles River rat. They all look like that.

  12. Dalton H. Says:

    Well your not really IN the cube, but the look on that beaver’s face tells me I shoul shut up.

  13. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “A startling look at Boston of the future — when retro haircuts run rampant on the streets!”

  14. A.R.Yngve Says:

    David Alexander McCall Smith
    A heartwarming novel of the future of The No.1 Ladies Detective Agency

  15. Zycrow Says:


  16. Kris Says:

    I can’t tell where the Muskrat ends and the woman’s hair begins…or, wait, is it a symbiotic relationship?

  17. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “Dammit, I’m NOT doing Catwoman 2! Give me a decent role or eat lead!!”

  18. Tom Noir Says:

    Oh and by the way, this site is now the top Google result for the phrase ‘demon muskrat vixens’.

    You can thank me later!

  19. A.R.Yngve Says:

    [between clenched teeth] Thank you… very… much!


  20. A.R.Yngve Says:

    It must be the first time in history that the cover artwork actually shot the artist dead in retaliation.

  21. GK Says:

    Is the beaver also holding gun?

  22. A.R.Yngve Says:

    One day, they pushed Beaverbo too far.

  23. Tom Noir Says:

    @GK – Yes. That beaver is, as they say, ‘packing heat’.

  24. Tom Noir Says:

    Looking at this cover now, I get the impression that this woman’s hair normally stands straight up, and that the rat/beaver/muskrat thing is the only thing holding it down.

  25. Tom Noir Says:

    Incidentally, rumor has it Ben Affleck is working on the film adaptation.

  26. Anna T. Says:

    I’ve alerted the government to the Sentient Demon Beaver problem, and they’re sending out the armed forces to annihilate the beavers and the people they’ve taken control of. How Boston got so badly affected, I don’t know, but I think there may have been some hiding in the Christmas tree they got from Halifax last year. Makes sense.

  27. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Beacon Hill -> Beacon WhattheHill

  28. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @Tom: you’ll be thrilled to hear that, years later, GSS is still the top hit for ‘demon muskrat vixens’.

  29. Tom Noir Says:

    I’m only mildly thrilled, since it interferes with my searches for pr0n!

  30. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @Tom: try leaving the ‘s’ off of vixens, maybe?

  31. fred Says:

    From the viewpoint of Roger Goodell.

  32. JuanPaul Says:

    Hmmm, future Boston, written in 1993. There’s a a chance this happened and I just happened to be out of town that weekend.

  33. Tat Wood Says:

    A radical re-imagining of ‘Make Way for Ducklings’.

  34. JuanPaul Says:

    I know what you’re thinking. ‘Did my beaver fire six shots or only five’? Well to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, i kind of lost track myself. But being that this is a Boston Beaver, the most irritable beaver in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself one question: ‘Do I feel bucky?’ Well do ya, punk?

  35. Bibliomancer Says:

    I live in Future Boston. The troubles began when the Future Maine beavers became sentient and lured away our women folk.

  36. B. Chiclitz Says:

    According to my well-thumbed edition of Grey’s Beaver Anatomy that fellow has the wrong tail, or, maybe, he’s found a better one.

  37. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @BC: so what you’re saying is, that’s actually a muskrat pointed at us? ๐Ÿ˜‰

  38. GSS ex-noob Says:

    By golly, that IS a muskrat. It’s a ROUS, but presumably the overgrowth comes along with the ability to use weapons.

  39. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @DSWithBTโ€”as in “Is that a muskrat in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?”๐Ÿฆ

  40. infoqueen Says:

    Now contemplating “Angry Beavers” as my all-girl punk band name. (When I start my all-girl punk band, that is…)

  41. Tom Noir Says:

    When muskrats are illegal, only criminals will have muskrats.

  42. Francis Boyle Says:

    OK, infoqueen, you can have ‘Angry Beavers’ but ‘Angry Beavers with Handguns’ is definitely going on my list of bad band names.

  43. Hammy Says:

    About the title of this…thing….

    “C U in the BE”?

  44. Tor Mented Says:

    In Future Boston, beaver eat you.

  45. Tor Mented Says:

    David Alexander Smith in: “The Cube.”
    Funny, IMDb doesn’t list him.

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