Apr 15

Horse!?! New women even night he has...Click for full image

Joachim Comments: Despite the pluralized ‘horse’ in the title, a naked redhead is far more important to include perched on “top” of the asteroid.
Published 1970

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.92 out of 10)

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41 Responses to “Horses’ Asteroid”

  1. saxonb Says:

    RT @GoodShowSir: New Book Cover: Horses’ Asteroid

  2. THX 1138 Says:

    Are they standing in a hole? I’m sure there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for all this.

  3. Scott B Says:

    It’s Lady Godiva’s personal modesty asteroid.

  4. SI Says:

    There has gotta be some horse puns… my head just isn’t working this morning…

    I love the look on Horse, “OHHHHH yeah!”

  5. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Pleased with their work, the editors mused:

    “We said ‘ass’ on the cover! Huh-huh, huh-huh…”
    “Heh-heh, heh-heh!”
    “Huh-huh, huh-huh…”
    “Heh-heh, heh-heh!”
    “Huh-huh, huh-huh…”

    Unt so weiter…

  6. Tat Wood Says:

    That’s no moon, that’s a half-melted chess-piece with her off ‘Mad Men’ embedded in it.

  7. Tat Wood Says:

    And some astro-turf.

    or maybe it’s real grass for the Modesty Sheep

  8. Adam Roberts Says:

    I looked at this cover three times, and each time I read its title as Horse Is A Steroid. This may be because I regularly ingest horse in an effort to bulk up my muscles.

  9. Bibliomancer Says:

    Or “Horses’ Ass” as it is commonly referred to in the publishing business.

  10. L.B. Says:

    So this Barbie and chess piece on an intergalactic divot walk into a bar…

  11. Michael Toland Says:

    That cover is so brilliantly horrible I’d probably buy this book without hesitation.

  12. SFRuminations Says:

    — oh the comments, my sides hurt —

  13. SFRuminations Says:

    RT @GoodShowSir: New Book Cover: Horses’ Asteroid

  14. Yoss Says:

    I think this cover qualifies for the Trypophobia Banned Books List. You know, if thrypophobes were united and organized enough to compile a list of literature with unsettling artwork.

  15. Jaouad Says:

    “Listen, honey, I don’t mind the long face, but next time please clip your toenails before we get into asteroid.”

  16. fred Says:

    Looks a little like the troublesome micro-meteorite from the original Andromeda Strain movie, maybe. Even has the green.

  17. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @Bibliomancer—note the subliminal support for this *Horse’s Ass* reading in the proliferating “s” sounds of the blurb, but try to avoid thinking about how truly awful that alliterative first line is:
    “A second scintillating collection of satisfying sic-fi. . . .”
    Really, “satisfying”?

  18. JuanPaul Says:

    She has a look on her face like she just realized that she’s trapped on asteroid with a gay horse who has no interest in her.

  19. Herm Says:

    The Horsehead Nebula had to downsize in the wake of the Great Galactic Recession.

  20. Bibliomancer Says:

    @B. Chiclitz – good observation. The blurb is written with a sort of galloping poetic meter – I believe it is called iambic pentathlon.

  21. David Cowie Says:

    What’s happened to the ratings?
    I’ve just noticed that there’s been a big shake-up in the top 15, and that the top rated books have lost about 0.5 of a point.

  22. Bibliomancer Says:

    @David Cowie – with the leaders bunched at the top with a 9.5 score, it is easier to advance your favorites by voting zero on the rival covers.

    I believe there is rampant voter fraud underway and I demand an investigation. I am allowed to repeatedly vote for my favorite bad book cover … and I’ve been deceased for years!

  23. FearöfMusic Says:

    Your own..personal..asteroid. Somewhere to take your horse, your horse of course. Reach out and touch him…

  24. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    I’m ridin’ ‘cross the cover on a horse with no game…

  25. Rags Says:

    Damn that asteroid grass, how did it get there??? What do they grow in the space grasss??

    It is blocking a perfectly good sheepy moment.

  26. FearöfMusic Says:

    Hmmmm. Spacegrass, Dodge Swinger, 1973, top down,chassis free…

  27. GSS Admin Says:

    @David Cowie & Biblomancer

    Excellent work Detectives! It seems we had someone, though coming from different addresses, spam the ratings system causing the chaos!

    The bad news is… the plugin I use doesn’t allow me to delete specific ratings, only all of them! So I either set, for example, I Sing the Body Electric back to zero or do nothing.

    Though I could always delete the logs, so everyone would be able to vote again and will keep the current rating. Basically the plugin I use sucks and I should really look at using another.

    I think Biblomancers suggestion of voting zero seems pretty good.

    A boon to you both!

  28. Tom Noir Says:

    I think it’s a sneak attack by someone at Baen Books who wants to make sure that their covers are not mocked but recognized as the masterpieces they truly are!

  29. Yoss Says:

    Is there a way to view more of the covers by rankings? For instance, if I wanted to see the ones lurking just outside of top 15 glory?

  30. GSS Admin Says:

    @Yoss – Why… I’m just working on that very thing! If you notice just above the ratings on the right hand side there is now a link of:

    Click here to see our Top Rated Covers

    That displays all the covers by rating, which you can scroll back through!

    Hopefully I’ll put a few things in the menu bar at some stage. Might need to update my template first though.

    EDIT – Actually just looking at it… it seems to be great for the first 3 pages then it starts throwing random rated covers in after. Man…

  31. Yoss Says:

    Now that’s service right there! Best of luck getting the details sorted out.

  32. David Cowie Says:

    It’s no surprise that the ratings upset was caused by a person or persons unknown spamming the site with low scores, the big question is WHY?

  33. hestia Says:

    I have nothing to add. Just…this website makes me so happy.

  34. Anti-Sceptic Says:

    The Horses’ Asteroid….where clothes are frowned upon.

  35. Jed Clodhead Says:

    Oh boy! I definitely owned this at one time in the dim and distant past but I have no memory of ever reading it, but I do remember it was much heavier than other books of a similar size. What can this mean? I must seek out a copy on E bay and find out….

  36. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:


  37. Anna T. Says:

    @JuanPaul: No, she’s contractually obligated to be in this picture, and she would really rather be absolutely anywhere else.

  38. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Latawnya, the Naughty Horse, Learns to Say ‘No’ to Soliciting For Prostitution

  39. Tom Noir Says:

    Looks like the redhead is…

    hot to trot.

  40. JJYoyo Says:

    Nude Girl and Panto Horse .5 are discovering why the 13th hole is Par 1000000

  41. Bruce A Munro Says:

    “Sure, it’s an efficiency apartment, but it’s got a lawn!”

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