Apr 14

Sweatin' to the OldiesClick for full image

Perry Armstrong Comments: When a godawful film adaptation of your excellent novel does the favour of – not – using the proper title, why oh why oh why then remind us about it on the cover?
Published 1992

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 6.40 out of 10)

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25 Responses to “Immortality Inc.”

  1. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:


  2. A.R.Yngve Says:

    Oh, how thoughtful! The cover comes with a Zoom In/Out button on the left side! Amazing what they can do these days…

  3. DaveM Says:

    “Basis for the film FreeJack”. That’s like saying “Written by the scriptwriter for Batman Forever”.

    As per the cover:
    ‘Some users have noted that after long use, the paint on the VR helmet can soften, and in extreme circumstances a small blue drop of paint may appear. All in-house tests show this is not a problem for any units shipped.’

  4. A.R.Yngve Says:

    When you start to drool, it’s time to turn off your VR goggles.

  5. Ray P Says:

    Lets do it. Lets use teal and orange as a colour-scheme.

  6. fred Says:

    Cover blurb should read ‘My book was made into a movie? With Antony Hopkins? How many Oscars did it win? – Robert Sheckley’

  7. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    At least they didn’t turn this one into a movie. And I say that as a fellow who participated in a few Shadowrun campaigns Back In The Day.

  8. THX 1138 Says:

    Tinfoil hats will never go out of fashion, so go one better: tinfoil goggles. You’ll never be fooled by the Illuminati again.

  9. Tom Noir Says:

    Nothing sells books like a cover featuring a guy who needs to wipe his nose.

  10. Ray P Says:

    The film has Mick Jagger in a rather fetching armoured car. I think the producers expected the next Total Recall and got Sleeper sans laughs – aside from Mick’s accent.

  11. Bibliomancer Says:

    Flow My Sweat, the Policeman Said

  12. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    @RayP: in the producers’ defense, I forgot I had ever seen that until you mentioned the Great Lipped One. ‘The movie where Mick Jagger doesn’t not try to act’ sticks in your memory better than ‘The movie’.

  13. Anna T. Says:

    No, sir, I don’t know why we’re waterboarding this person in a tinfoil suit, sir. Orders from above, sir.

    Either that, or Tinfoil Suit got very startled and dropped their drink.

    Your choice.

  14. Ray P Says:

    “If he swallows any of that I’m out of a job.”

  15. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Some time ago a guy showed up on the cable TV show Pawn Stars with the car from Freejack for sale. He wanted 13k for it. I think the owners of the pawn shop laughed at him. Maybe if it had been painted in the teal-and-orange motif, it would have gone for a bit more.

  16. Tat Wood Says:

    The experiment to install artificial intelligence in the trophies for the 1992 Brit Awards backfired as the one given to Prince began to speculate on what he’d use her for….

  17. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Stannum Chopper, from the gritty 90s thriller The Wizordor of Mega-City OZ

  18. THX 1138 Says:

    Mr Jagger in Freejack is camper than Liberace in Sincerely Yours.

  19. SI Says:

    Haha I remember when I was young, I had a friend whose parents really didn’t care what they watched. So we saw Aliens, Predator, Robocop and all the awesome stuff they made toys for well before we really should of.

    One day, he had Free Jack. “BUT IT HAS MICK JAGGER IN IT!” He said… I didn’t know who the hell he was at the time.

    We made it about half way through the movie before putting on Total Recall. I have never returned to it, all I remember is a race car crashing for some reason and a pointlessly distracting video phone in a car.

    I like to keep my memory of Freejack to that.

  20. HappyBookworm Says:

    Someone filled this poor fellow’s helmet with water when he wasn’t looking. When he put it on he was unpleasantly surprised to be dripping wet. That’s not a nice joke!

  21. A.R.Yngve Says:

    I’ve seen FREEJACK… it’s one of those “pre-Internet”, “pre-cellphone” early-90s stories where society is going to hell while people are spellbound by some shitty Virtual Reality that would bore you to tears in today’s real world.

  22. RachelJ Says:

    @A.R.Yngve. Wasn’t that the plot of basically *everything* in the early 90’s?

  23. Tom Noir Says:

    I thought that movie was STRANGE DAYS.

  24. RachelJ Says:

    @Tom Noir. It was every movie.

  25. A.R.Yngve Says:

    And every single cover of OMNI Magazine.

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