Oct 16

Shit, I forgot my arrow.Click for full image

Hello there sir, could I stop you for a quick survey today? Excellent. Imagine that we gave you a cover that included terrible fonts, a man with a very chiseled chin in some sort of armour, holding his short bow. Then pump tons of strange glows and lens flare on places you’d not expect. On scale of one to ten, how likely are you going to take this on a bus with you? Sir? Come back! Sir?

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.75 out of 10)

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28 Responses to “Echoes of the Great Song”

  1. SI Says:

    To be fair, Gemmell usually has way worse fonts on his covers.

    I do love the arrow-less bow though! Anyone remember the old dungeons and dragons cartoon? Maybe he creates magic arrows. Hence the stupid lens flare on his hands.

  2. CSA Says:

    Gemmel seems to keep all his books in the same theme/font/layout etc.
    I don’t think they look THAT bad in general, but ive seen worse ones of his ( and alot worse in general). I’ve even read one or two in public

    On the plus side to his covers, they’ve all got fairly muted colours (apart from the gold font) and never has a billion things in the background. But the characters always look cheesey.

    The lens flair makes this worse than it should be, its so over used as a “magic” effect. but we’ve definately seen ALOT worse use of it on a cover.

  3. little mi Says:

    Anyone who gets the word Humdinger on their cover gets my unending awe and respect everytime.

    Plus I do so love David Gemmel; the king of angsty middle-age male fantasy, and I’m not even middle aged or male…not even a bit!

  4. SI Says:

    Alright alright… No more Gemmel then 😛

    Sheesh you can’t keep you guys happy! haha

    Guess I’ll have to add a DG book to my reading collection at some stage. Although that guys hair must need a lot of grease to keep the ends like that!

  5. CSA Says:

    I wouldn’t say Gemmel is amazing, i’ve only read a handful and never felt compelled to read more. The stories are good (not brilliant) but theres few better books for battles and good ole fashioned ass kicking.

    … his hair is pretty strange looking… but i just noticed how incredibly similar he looks to a young Arnie (conan era)

  6. little mi Says:

    Gemmell is really, really good at doing one particular story line and set of characters. His books are all basically as follows:
    Middle aged man’s whole family, love of their life or similar are killed instigating a massive revenge spree in which he kicks lots of arse but is left troubled, broody and generally a bit upset about the world in general. He then somehow turns out by some quirk of fate to be the only one who, despite his flawed nature and general dislike of human kind, can save the world from some evil demon, king, army, whatever. Lots of kicking of evil arse ensues.

    So that’s the plot of pretty much every book Gemmell ever wrote but as brain candy goes I think his books rank among the best.

    He does have some pretty darn dodgy covers though, all broody long haired men with swords or bows looking a bit constipated.

  7. Roses Says:

    I’m afraid I am a deep seated DG fan. Though I think I’ve got a previous edition to this book, which is worse than this.

    For a woman, what could be better an emotionally unavailable, kick-arse hero?

    Seriously, they are even better than vampires.

    However, getting back to the cover at hand – it is dreadful isn’t it?

  8. SI Says:

    Alrighty, the DG is definatly bullet proof then 😛

    I am sure you will find though that a lot of these modern vampires are way too EMO. They are complete emotion losers.

    I suggest that if you ever have to read any of the vampire love stories floating about simply image the main character as Christopher Lee. It makes the story so much better, I swear 😉

  9. JustinLeego Says:

    I’m loving the way that the flare from the tip of the arrowless bow’s arrow magically lights up Hunk’s chiselled facial features.

  10. JustinLeego Says:

    And that face…. it’s a combination of Conan-era Schwarzenegger and… who else?

  11. CSA Says:

    Steven Seagal?

    I also love the random gold… thing… going across the middle of the cover behind his head

  12. Adam Roberts Says:

    You know those joke-shop arrows, axes or knives, made of plastic but with a semicircular section taken out of them so that you can fit them over the top of your head and it looks, for comic effect, as though your cranium has been penetrated by said arrow, axe or knife?

    This Conanalike figure has got himself a golden scimitar one of those.

  13. Adam Roberts Says:

    Also … man alive the hair. The hair the hair the hair.

  14. SI Says:

    I know who he reminds me off. That big chin guy that is always, “Hey it’s that dude.” Probably most noted as the alien guy in the x-files with that little knife needle thing.

    Picture here!

    I need to get out more….

  15. Roses Says:

    You’re right. He’s a dead-ringer. It was the hair that had us fooled.

    Yes, you should get out more…it’s your turn to pick up the wine and crisps. Red this time. And not that cheap Lambrini shite either.

  16. SI Says:

    Lambrini? What do you think I am cheap?

    I’ll just get you a bottle of buckfast and I’ll pick up a 2ltr of White Diamond for myself.

  17. Roses Says:

    You’re so classy.

    Just don’t be sick on my plant pots.

  18. SI Says:

    Plant pots? You mean those chamber pots? Uh Oh…..

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    Damn right it is, mate.

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  22. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    Vaguely American Indian Double Chin Guy is very informative. The lens flare is very professionally rendered. I enjoy reading every day…to the exclusion of all other activities…

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  24. Tom Noir Says:

    I imagine it is difficult to hunt buffalo while constipated.

  25. anon Says:

    Echoes of a great cover.
    @little mi: “Humdinger”, “masterly” and “verve”: It has to be a great book.
    @Tom Noir: I would think it easier than with diarrhea.

  26. Dead Stuff With Big Teeth Says:

    ‘A catawampus synecdoche…my prolapsed fibrillation janeanegarofaloed!’
    -Rave Reviews

  27. A.R.Yngve Says:

    “He drew the bowstring taut, and the enemy horde hesitated for a moment as he took aim with a magic arrow… then he cried out:

    ‘GET TO DA CHOPPAH!!!’ “

  28. GSS ex-noob Says:

    This guy is so Ah-nuld-esque that he really needs the “faux-nan” tag.

    In the smaller image, I thought he was completely shirtless and wearing a bustier. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

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