Oct 23

That diet leads to colon problemsClick for larger image

Alice Comments: And cotton candy for dessert. Then she threw up.

Published 1966

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.33 out of 10)

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23 Responses to “Claret, Sandwiches and Sin”

  1. THX 1139 Says:

    This isn’t The Incredible Melting Man again, is it?

  2. Francis Boyle Says:

    I don’t know WTF that image is or is meant to be but it isn’t half as bad as the typography.

  3. JuanPaul Says:

    The artist was at a loss as to what to create for the cover of this absurd novel until he cleaned out his fridge and found the above life form in a Tupperware container at the back of the bottom shelf.

  4. Bibliomancer Says:

    The punctuation tells us the real sin here is Madelaine Duke.

  5. Daniel Ramsey Says:

    Much as I love the Oxford comma, I don’t think it would have helped here.

  6. A.R.Yngve Says:

    So their murder weapon is “Le Blob,” then?

  7. Alice Says:

    Not even the Oxford Comma can save this hot mess.

  8. Raoul Says:

    From Goodreads:

    “Mysterious assassinations of world figures throw suspicion on Lady Salvia & her middle-aged widow friends.”

    I knew Lady Saliva was all over this one!

  9. fred Says:

    @ Raoul. “…Lady Salvia & her middle-aged widow friends.”

    With that sentence as the blurb BAEN would not fail to deliver the goods on a cover, especially if it turned out to be a massive bait and switch in the widow dept..

  10. Tat Wood Says:

    ‘An underground organisation assassinates world leaders’

    The Wombles have gone pro-active over plastic waste.

  11. Bibliomancer Says:

    @Tat – actually it’s “world-leaders”

    Punctuation gone mad. There is no God!

  12. Raoul Says:

    @fred – Yeah. There would be some serious cougar cleavage on that cover.

  13. Tat Wood Says:

    @Bibliomancer: it’s also ‘organization’ but I was trying to lead by example after earlier misguided American comments about punctuation.

  14. Tor Mented Says:

    I think the artist dropped something. Maybe it was acid. Maybe it was food coloring in Lady Salvia’s litter box.

  15. Pat Says:

    This is a continuation of the horror theme, I presume? I might allow Lovecraft to describe this as “an undescribable horror”.

    For those as confused as I was, Madelaine is the author – not the title of this volume of C, S and S.

  16. Tat Wood Says:

    It’s a hitherto-unpublished chapter of Proust.

    ‘Claret sandwiches and sin: Madeleine, Duke?’

    Grammatically, it needs ‘Claret’ to be a verb (meaning ‘bugger’ or ‘forget’) but we can’t have everything.

  17. Tor Mented Says:

    Here is a cover that says, “That’s not how you’re supposed to use your colon.”

  18. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Well-punctuated @Tor M! 😉

  19. Bruce A Munro Says:

    So the assassins are underground because they’re some sort of fungi?

    “Mysterious assassinations of world figures throw suspicion on Lady Salvia & her middle-aged widow friends.”

    If world figures were being assassinated left and right my immediate thought would not be “middle aged British widows.” Presumably the international authorities know something I don’t. Is this one of a continuing series in which Lady Salvia (which I can’t stop myself from reading as Lady Saliva ) and her friends involve themselves in international intrigue?

    “Warm up the rocket-car, Dame Fink-Nottle: we’re needed in Peru!”

  20. GSS ex-noob Says:

    “What is ‘an afternoon with the naughty vicar’, Alex?”

    At best, it looks kind of like those crystals you grow on charcoal with bluing and ammonia, with something else splashed down in front.

    Punctuation fails on nearly every level, as does layout and spacing.

    @Tat: It could be “claret sandwiches”. I know claret would make a terrible sandwich, but this is a terrible cover.

    @Tag W: “Sqaure”? The bad writing is contagious!

  21. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @GSS ex-noob: perhaps the picture is what happens when you add too much claret to your sandwich.

  22. Alessandra Kelley Says:

    I find it impossible to tell if that cover is supposed to be claret, sandwiches, or sin.

  23. Verylatetotheparty Says:

    @Alessandra K.: I think, maybe, it’s what’s left after doing something sinful with a sandwich after quite a lot of claret.

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