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Sep 01

The horror! The horror!Click for larger image

Wendy comments: “You want to know why I wear robes with padded shoulders? Look at me! Are you sorry now?”

Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.43 out of 10)
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22 Responses to “Beyond Time”

  1. Ikari Gendo Says:

    Faux Manchu looks like he’s regretting setting the air conditioner on max blow. And the sound of the fan is giving his girlfriend a headache.

  2. THX 1139 Says:

    Thinks: “Not the jumbo shrimp for dinner again!”

  3. Francis Boyle Says:

    I like what they’ve done with the cave. Just because you’re hideous parodies of human beings clinging to the last remnants of sanity in a desolate wasteland of withered hopes doesn’t mean you can’t have a nice rug.

  4. Bibliomancer Says:

    Harry Bennett. The master of horrified, bony, screeching women portraits..

  5. Tor Mented Says:

    That’s not how you draw an exoskeleton.

  6. Tor Mented Says:

    Maybe she’s not everyone’s dream girl, but Tom Jones likes her.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0r8GVPAvd4

  7. fred Says:

    If I had x-ray vision I wouldn’t be looking at bones.

  8. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Harry Bennett should have had the decency to finesse those “feet” with some tasteful smoke or fog the way the other UAI graduates do.

  9. THX 1139 Says:

    @fred: You might be, just unintentionally.

  10. JuanPaul Says:

    Is arthritis pain ruining your scifi/fantasy cover? Talk to your art director about Anatomys™.

  11. Bruce A Munro Says:

    “Are you suffering from Partial Invisibility Syndrome (PIS)? Do people see your unsightly bones and/or internal organs at inconvenient times? Try our new hypoallergenic flesh-colored body paint, and never again worry about sending your guests shrieking into the night!”

  12. Bruce A Munro Says:

    I have that collection – it’s a bunch of alternate history short stories, some pretty clever. The cover illustration does very little to sell it.

  13. JuanPaul Says:

    @bruce It sounds like a case of bonus eruptus…
    https://youtu.be/DqbQzmHOLP8

  14. Verylatetotheparty Says:

    @Francis B. 3) …It ties the whole cold, dank cavern together.

  15. Ryan Says:

    Bear-wielding? Where is the bear?

    @Francis Boyle, I thought that the blue thing on the ground was the swimming pool, and she is just doing a fancy, tumbling dive for the Manchu judge.

  16. GSS ex-noob Says:

    Other than being random, ugly, and stupid there’s not much wrong with this. More’s the pity if it’s as good as @Bruce says.

    @B’man: He’s got form. And the forms are ugly.

    @Ryan: I agree entirely:

    1. No bear.

    2. That’s definitely a swimming pool — there’s even a red beach ball.

    3. We need a “Faux Manchu” tag — I’ll bet there’s previous examples.

  17. Alice Says:

    Everything about this cover is godawful ugly.

  18. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @GSS ex-noob: “Faux Manchu?” That works as a double pun. 🙂 Although my guess was Faux Middle Easterner – which I admit is rather less euphonious.

  19. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Bruce: #1 said it first, then @Ryan, then me.

    ISTM he’s drawn rather more like the painted-up white guys seen in old movies pretending to be Yellow Peril of Our Preshus White Wimmin. Thus, he is a Faux Manchu.

    Anyway, that’s 4 of us in favor of the tag, so I hope @TagW agrees.

  20. Tor Mented Says:

    I was hoping someone would reply to No. 6 and say “It’s not unusual.”

  21. FearofMusĂŻc Says:

    I dunno. Tarzan kinda looks like Speedy from the 1950’s Alka Seltzer adverts. Is this a repurposed ad? Is Mr Lion thinking “I can’t believe I ate the whole thing…”?

  22. A. R. Yngve Says:

    Q: How does one “unravel the threads of time”?

    A: With a pair of very, very large knitting needles attached to a spinning black hole.

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