Sep 29

Tough loveClick for larger image

Ryan Comments: Guns, leather and global warming were all very boring to Uta and Grolsch.

Published 1987

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.33 out of 10)

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17 Responses to “Hardwired”

  1. THX 1139 Says:

    Dolph Lundgren tries to muscle in on Fabio’s act.

  2. Francis Boyle Says:

    Oddly enough, two of my favourite things are not blank stares and 80s hair so I ‘m glad to have had absolutely nothing to do with cover.

    Fire up the drum machine.

    Blank stares
    and 80s hair.
    Uh, uh, uh, uh.
    Yes, baby it’s true.
    I’m a fighter, I’m a lover
    I’m stuck on this cover
    stuck on this cover with you.
    Uh, uh, uh, uh.

  3. Ryan Says:

    Since neither character appears to be wearing undergarments, the amount of chafing from all those leather straps, leather jackets, leather collars, etc. must be impressive.

    Perhaps it is not boredom that the illustrator portrays, but a seething desire to remain perfectly still until it is time to don their pajamas.

  4. fred Says:

    Someone went and substituted ideal for nipple in Rogers blurb.

  5. JuanPaul Says:

    With that tattoo, she must the Last of the Hairbenders.

  6. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @fred—GSS! 😉

  7. B. Chiclitz Says:

    All this tough steely-eyed posing and vamping look is undercut by the tiny delta-winged rocket about to fly into her ear.

  8. Bibliomancer Says:

    Zelazny wishes he wrote this one. Novels pay better than blurbs.

  9. Bruce A Munro Says:

    They asked Arnold Schwarzenegger to model for the cover, but he turned them down on the basis of it being “too over the top.”

  10. GSS ex-noob Says:

    This right here is peak 80s cyberpunk.

    @Ryan: Normally I’d agree with you about the chafing, but since these two seem to be some sort of mannequins or wax figures, I don’t think so.

  11. B. Chiclitz Says:

    By the way, is that a shadowy yet still jaunty hip there?

  12. Verylatetotheparty Says:

    ‘A tough sleek juggernaut…’ Well he certainly looks very… oh right, ‘A tough sleek juggernaut of a STORY.’ – my mistake.

  13. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @BC: I’d say half a jaunt at best.

  14. Verylatetotheparty Says:

    I don’t mind the font, but I admit I’m a bit unsure if the title is ‘Ijardwired’ or ‘Nardwired’

  15. DaveM Says:

    “When you want to cosplay as Duke Nukem but she wants to cosplay as Bayonetta”. 🙂

    A dull cover for sure, but it does fit the story (not the dullness, the story moves at a good clip). This is early WJW when he was still experimenting with styles, and this one has a very “William Gibson rewrites Damnation Alley” vibe to it.

  16. A. R. Yngve Says:

    On his deathbed, Luis Royo will be visited by the ghosts of every actor whose face he’s “borrowed” without permission…

  17. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @Vlttp: “IJardwired” is the title of the Dutch translation.

    @ARY: And the ones who are still alive will turn up in person.

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