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Feb 09

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It’s a Two-fer Tuesday: Dreaming Jewels Jamboree!

Good Show Sir Comments:

1. Jewely Andrews

2. Jewels and Jim

Published 1950, 1955

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 8.00 out of 10)
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16 Responses to “The Dreaming Jewels”

  1. THX 1139 Says:

    1: Anybody thinks they can put out a workout video these days.

    2: I thought Ken Campbell was more a Robert Anton Wilson kind of guy?

  2. Francis Boyle Says:

    1. Generic fifties lazy cover design.

    2. Oh my fuckin’ god, they went there!

  3. fred Says:

    1. If Marylin Monroe did a Hitchcock film, the inevitable dream sequence would probably be something like this.

    2. Dreaming of cover #1.

  4. JuanPaul Says:

    These covers are a special kind of bad. It sounds like something I would like to read, however. From wikipedia:

    8-year-old Horton “Horty” Bluett runs away from his abusive family, carrying only a smashed jack-in-the-box named Junky. Disguised as a girl, Horty takes refuge among the “strange people” in a traveling circus. The owner of the carnival, Pierre Monetre, is a disgraced doctor and scientist with a deep hatred of mankind. Having discovered intelligent nonhuman life in the form of crystal-like jewels, Monetre works to unlock the source of their great power and, ultimately, destroy mankind. Zena, a carnival performer, takes Horty under her wing. She knows that Horty is the key to executing Monetre’s destructive plan, and the only one powerful enough to stop him.

  5. Ryan Says:

    That second cover is a guarantee of low sales, surely. I would not read it on a train, I would not read it on a plane, that book featuring a giant head, I would not be caught reading it if I were dead.

  6. Tat Wood Says:

    The first one’s sort of in line with the plot except that she gives the boy guitar lessons.

    The second might have worked forty years later as a ‘Crystal Maze’ tie-in.

  7. J A Herdman Says:

    1. For when you can’t draw hands

    2. For when you can’t draw bodies.

  8. Tor Mented Says:

    1.) We’ve got diamonds,
    Yes we do!
    We’ve got diamonds,
    How ’bout you?
    Yeah, team!

  9. Bruce A Munro Says:

    “Welcome to the freak show! See the amazing diamond-fisted piebald woman! See the incredible, giant-headed, jewel-eyed Mr. Punch! And for an extra dollar, our clown artist will draw you a picture to remember your experience (feet not included)!”

    @Ryan: would you read it in a box?

  10. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Sentient beings of all persuasions agree, her jewels are dreamier.

  11. Tracy Says:

    The first cover is not bad. It’s very emblemic of 1950s design. I wonder if the publisher was Arkham House. They did a lot of those limited-palette dust covers.

  12. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @Tracy: yeah, there are definitely worse. Here’s the “artist thought he was illustrating a horror story” cover: https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/51i5yamCM7L._SL500_.jpg

  13. Bruce A Munro Says:

    And here’s the pulpy version (doesn’t “The Dreaming Jewels” sound like a pulp-era story title?)

    https://i5.walmartimages.com/asr/01933a7f-48c2-47b0-bacb-610e548fadf5.949661b0250c9b5f86809994cf1394eb.jpeg

  14. Bibliomancer Says:

    Sturgeon’s Law
    90% of Sturgeon book covers are crap

  15. A. R. Yngve Says:

    Cover #2 makes total sense if the target group are Neo-Nazis…

  16. GSS ex-noob Says:

    @B’man: Indeed.

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