Jul 20

Guy N(amed) SmithClick for larger image

Good Show Sir Comments: The Real Slime Shady

Published 1976

Actually, that cover IS a classical work of art!I would touch it without protective gloves.I've seen worse. Far, far, worse.Interesting, but I would still read it in public.Middlng: Neither awful nor awfully goodWould not like to be seen reading that!Awful... just awful...That belongs in a gold-lame picture frame!Gah... my eyes are burning! Feels so good!Good Show Sir! (Average: 7.30 out of 10)

Tagged with:

19 Responses to “The Slime Beast”

  1. Tat Wood Says:

    I worked on a few market stalls in the 80s and spent a lot of time perusing others, looking for decent paperbacks. I saw a lot of Guy N Smith, usually crabs or suchlike. I mean a LOT, but never this one. There are three possibilities:

    1. People really liked it and re-read it.

    2. People who were prepared to give other NEL schlock house-room destroyed them rather than give them away.

    3. The publishers – New English Library, purveyors of Barsoomery and ‘Richard Allen’ hackery about skinheads and girl gangs – were ashamed of this alone and went round removing all copies from shops.

  2. Bibliomancer Says:

    Ladies and gentlemen, let’s meet the author.

  3. JuanPaul Says:

    “Hi there, I am your new Guy N. Ecologist…hey, why are you running away?”

  4. fred Says:

    Sounds like trashy pulp fun at only 110 pages.

    ‘…after Smith has treated us to a little sleaze. Indeed the novel disproves my blanket (mis)judgment of British pulp as being prudish in the sex department,’

  5. Nequam Says:

    The head is a total artistic lift/steal from The She Creature:

  6. Tor Mented Says:

    Artist ripped off the imaginative Paul Blaisdell design from 1956’s “The She-Creature,” which was featured on MST3K.
    Tor’s Rule: Even if they really smoke pipes, any authors who pose for photos smoking a pipe are tools.

  7. B. Chiclitz Says:

    @B’Mancer—That has to be the most disgusting photo of pipe smoking I’ve ever seen. It looks like the pipe has dissolved all the teeth on the right side of his mouth and is just wedged in there. Talk about slime!

    Thanks for posting. Now I’m throwing away all my old Meerschaums.

  8. A. R. Yngve Says:

    It came from the unknown with a monstrous appetite for fondue!

  9. Francis Boyle Says:

    Art direction: “And make sure you make it look exactly like a man in a suit. We wouldn’t want to confuse the readers.”

  10. THX 1139 Says:

    Guy (RIP) had two great passions in life: tobacco and guns. He wrote books about them, too. He’s what you call “a character”.

  11. THX 1139 Says:

    “Anyone have a handkerchief?”

  12. Bibliomancer Says:

    @THX – Actually, he is what you call The Great Scribbler”.

  13. GSS ex-noob Says:

    So I see Smith occasionally branched out from crabs.

    And judging by his photo, might have been a Slime Beast himself.

  14. THX 1139 Says:

    @Bibliomancer: That sounds a bit… furtive.

  15. Bruce A Munro Says:

    @Tor Mented: do they have to be puffing out smoke like a chimney for it to count? Because I recall several pictures of Tolkien with a pipe, sans any billowing clouds.

    Does the slime monster just live in slime, or does it produce it copiously, like a hagfish? Because in the picture it looks like it’s about to chuck a handful (clawful) of it at someone. [1]

    (Either way, with the slime and all the spines, this is definitely a guest you don’t want on the good furniture).

    [1] Either that, or it’s pissed because someone threw a bunch of eggs at it.

  16. B. Chiclitz Says:

    Judging from his penchant for “extremely lewd soft core sex scenes,” as well as his generally sleazy appearance, I’m guessing the novel about the “enemy crab” is more about catching the crabs than fighting them.

  17. Tor Mented Says:

    @Bruce: Point taken. So let’s remove any assumption of toolness from Tolkien and transfer it all to Smith.

  18. Tor Mented Says:

    @Nequam 5) Sorry, didn’t mean to repeat what you just said. I thought I had checked the most recent posts.

  19. Hammy Says:

    …and starring Guy N. Smith’s Slime Beast, a saga bigger than the American West, but not as big as the oceans, the gripping but soggy Western…

    “A Fistful of Seaweed”

Leave a Reply